Googled DP... Mistake!

[Scaredlady]

So I apparently have 'acute noise anxiety' but my never ending fear is that I have schizophrenia/bipolar or will get these illnesses.

Anyway I came across a thread on here about depersonalisation and was so happy to read that it is another symptom of anxiety.

I have been experiencing depersonalisation every once in a while for the last six months but had no idea what it actually was until I read about it on here.

The mistake I then made was googling it because I wanted to expand on the knowledge that I had learned from this site... It was a massive mistake because since googling it yesterday my so called anxiety has increased.

I found reference to the fact depersonalisation is also a sign of schizophrenia, so I am once again terrified. I have spent the day trying to shake the thoughts away, tell myself it is 'Just anxiety' but it hasn't helped.

I know already that I will not be able to sleep again tonight because I won't be able to switch my mind off and I am consumed with worry about being schizophrenic/bi polar.

I keep telling myself 'Even if it is schizophrenia I will get help, I will get better' but then I start to panic again. I am trying to reason and rationalise my thoughts but I am so afraid of being schizophrenic that I can't stop thinking about it.

I was over the moon when I realised depersonalisation was anxiety related but my mind has gone into over drive since discovering there is also a schizophrenia link to depersonalisation.

Has anyone got any advice? I hate being frightened but I am actually sat here 'listening' and second guessing every noise, even the silence.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Someone with your fear is naturally going to panic when they see this and it is good that you are trying to rationalise it because many wouldn't and would just become consumed by their fear. You know that DP/DR are medically recognised symptoms of anxiety disorders and they probably are for depression too. Also, and I don't say this to scare you, but anxiety can be experienced in schizophrenia and bipolar...I say that because I want you to realise that there are many overlaps between anxiety disorders and other mental health conditions. I bet you only know a small fraction of mental health disorders, like all of us unless you read more about them, so you will be working with not enough knowledge to say "this always means this" and "that always means that" hence you come across what you found via Google and it caught you off-guard. A medical professional who works in mental health understands the full breadth of mental health conditions so knows there are a lot more out there than the main ones we hear about i.e. anxiety disorders, depression, schizophrenia, bipolar, etc. It's diverse.

I've spent some time reading about quite a few disorders to get a better understanding of myself and other people and I can tell you that whilst there are core symptoms there are often overlaps into other disorders in terms of things like anxiety or mood.

So, use this as well. Tell yourself that DP/DR exists in many conditions, there is even a DP/DR Disorder which is a rare one.

GP's are trained to make the initial assessments of things like schizophrenia and bipolar. The reason for this is that they need quicker access to mental health services. In England & Wales we have IAPT which has come in to deal with lesser mental health conditions like anxiety disorders & depression. So overhere our GP's have to know how to diagnose schizophrenia & bipolar because those people are sent to a more advanced service above IAPT, the original community mental health teams.

Honestly, there are so many overlaps. I have the minimum 4 criteria for Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) according to my therapist based on the list of criteria BUT I don't have the actual underlying mindset of someone with OCPD so I can't have OCPD. So, you have to be careful with some of these things.