damianjmcgrath
26-10-15, 19:48
I've been really suffering for the last few days, my anxiety has been pretty high because of a chesty cold I've got causing aches right in the area I don't want!
Tonight, I went for a jog, just a gentle 10 min jog but it exhausted me. Hopefully the cold is affecting my fitness as opposed to anything more sinister. When I came back, I had dinner then felt so tired, I had a quick nap. This was about 6pm.
I woke up about 45 mins later, and my left wrist was hurting with pinching pains. My upper back was also aching. This brought on fast heart beats and a big panicking feeling. My throat felt like it was closing over. I got a weird heavy feeling above my eyes like something was forcing them to close. I couldn't quite catch my breath and felt I was noticeably breathing quicker.
Over the next hour or so, I got some stabbing pinching feelings in my left arm pit and then central chest. It was a heavy indigestion style pain which freaked me out more because it was central. I got really cold, and clammy.
I've had anxiety for a long time but it rarely reaches that point where I was convinced I was in real trouble. This was probably the most "real" it's ever felt.
Right now, I'm lying on the sofa, the feelings have subsided but I'm still feeling really tired and shaky. It's a weird type of tiredness, like I want to close my eyes and give up. The sensation of giving up is strong. It's like I have to fight against the feeling of drifting away. I've also got a weird chest feeling, like its itchy. Actually scratching it or rubbing it does help, but it's not a skin itchiness, it feels like it's under the skin.
My left arm feels strange, like it's a bit heavier. Feels like it needs more effort to move it.
Emotionally, I withdrew into myself - I'm really struggling to find anything on TV to distract me. Everything bores me or I don't have the focus for anything. Chatting to family doesn't interest me. I feel my capacity to deal with anything has disappeared completely - if my baby started crying now, I wouldn't be able to cope, I think I'd be so annoyed and wound up.
It's hugely frustrating. I know it's anxiety. It's felt worse then usual which created some doubt for me but I know it's anxiety. But telling myself that didn't work. Breathing exercises didn't work. Distraction didn't work. My mind stayed fixed on the negatives and I'm frustrated in myself that I allowed it to build and I seem to be getting worse at dealing with it. I've now got the added anxiety that it's getting worse and I don't want it to.
I don't really know what advice I'm asking for, I guess I just wanted to share. If anyone has any comments, I'd be interested in reading them. I hate that this can suddenly overwhelm my life for a few hours. I'd love to ignore it but it's like it disables me and I find it impossible to think about anything else.
Tonight, I went for a jog, just a gentle 10 min jog but it exhausted me. Hopefully the cold is affecting my fitness as opposed to anything more sinister. When I came back, I had dinner then felt so tired, I had a quick nap. This was about 6pm.
I woke up about 45 mins later, and my left wrist was hurting with pinching pains. My upper back was also aching. This brought on fast heart beats and a big panicking feeling. My throat felt like it was closing over. I got a weird heavy feeling above my eyes like something was forcing them to close. I couldn't quite catch my breath and felt I was noticeably breathing quicker.
Over the next hour or so, I got some stabbing pinching feelings in my left arm pit and then central chest. It was a heavy indigestion style pain which freaked me out more because it was central. I got really cold, and clammy.
I've had anxiety for a long time but it rarely reaches that point where I was convinced I was in real trouble. This was probably the most "real" it's ever felt.
Right now, I'm lying on the sofa, the feelings have subsided but I'm still feeling really tired and shaky. It's a weird type of tiredness, like I want to close my eyes and give up. The sensation of giving up is strong. It's like I have to fight against the feeling of drifting away. I've also got a weird chest feeling, like its itchy. Actually scratching it or rubbing it does help, but it's not a skin itchiness, it feels like it's under the skin.
My left arm feels strange, like it's a bit heavier. Feels like it needs more effort to move it.
Emotionally, I withdrew into myself - I'm really struggling to find anything on TV to distract me. Everything bores me or I don't have the focus for anything. Chatting to family doesn't interest me. I feel my capacity to deal with anything has disappeared completely - if my baby started crying now, I wouldn't be able to cope, I think I'd be so annoyed and wound up.
It's hugely frustrating. I know it's anxiety. It's felt worse then usual which created some doubt for me but I know it's anxiety. But telling myself that didn't work. Breathing exercises didn't work. Distraction didn't work. My mind stayed fixed on the negatives and I'm frustrated in myself that I allowed it to build and I seem to be getting worse at dealing with it. I've now got the added anxiety that it's getting worse and I don't want it to.
I don't really know what advice I'm asking for, I guess I just wanted to share. If anyone has any comments, I'd be interested in reading them. I hate that this can suddenly overwhelm my life for a few hours. I'd love to ignore it but it's like it disables me and I find it impossible to think about anything else.