Feel nervous walking into a bar, waiting at bar and when about to leave bar

[William1992]

Hello,

I often struggle with anxiety when

1.) About to enter the bar, alone, feeling as if everyone is looking towards me.
2.) Waiting at bar, waiting for a drink - I worry I look 'awkward' to staff members...
3.) Also when about to leave the bar, walking past people.

It's horrible phases.

Does anyone else have these feelings, and/or recommendations on best ways to deal with these situations?

Thanks

[annnaa]

I'm 14 years old & i often have these feelings, not just in bars. even when i'm walking down the street or when i'm in the bus.
it really depends on my mood. when i haven't spoken to anyone but my parents & sister for days, this will probably happen. do you always struggle with anxiety in these situations? haven't there been times when you felt confident and less awkward?

my father recently told me that sometimes we feel stronger in situations where you know the people around you are "weaker" than you. it may sound odd, but that's just the way it is. i can be very talkative around people who don't talk much. when i'm ordering something in a bar, and the waiter just asks me what i want, the moment will most likely pass without anything awkward happening. but i'll probably be the quiet and awkward one if the waiter starts asking me how i'm doing and why i'm looking sad or blabla..

the only way to get rid of this problem is to stop caring. i know, people say it all the time, but it is indeed the only way. i'm still struggling with the same problem, even though i know i shouldn't care about what other people think of me. but if you just stop caring about feeling awkward and start focusing on what you're going to wear on the day of your job interview, you're just going to enter the bar thinking about the suit you rented and not about the people who're looking at you.

Good luck! Xx

[jayb1]

I suffer with hand tremors through my anxiety and am constantly thinking people are staring at me . The reality is people are getting on with their own lives and worries why would we be so important that they are paying attention to us.I think we all need a boost of confidence . The longer I say to myself I don't care what people think the more I believe it

[red_willlow]

I know how u feel. The only way I deal with this is to go in the quieter evenings and go with someone so I'm not alone or I just don't go :(

[rainwinder]

I know that feeling, its very uncomfortable and you are worrying about how people see you and what you should to to make yourself not seem strange.
In fact, no one actually cares how you look or behave and no one will remember you after you leave.

[ChrisScotland]

Yeah, most people with anxiety are very self-conscious. If you're ever in that situation, try flicking through your phone to distract yourself from thinking about people staring at you. But as others say, most people will be getting on with what they're doing and won't be paying any attention to you.