RobinM
18-02-07, 04:16
My name is Robin, I'm 20 and from the East Midlands.
I'm not really sure where to start about the problems I've been having recently, so I'll just list them randomly, not really sure where to post them either, I hope it's ok in here, if not, if someone can point me in the right direction, go ahead.
I have severe Emetophobia (although, that said, I suppose you can't have it mildly) and every time I feel ill, even indigestion, I panic, assuming that I'm going to be sick. (this is the reason for me being awake at 4am on a Sunday)
This has also cause sort of mild Agorophobia, basically, I ALWAYS have to have a drink with me when I go out, so I avoid it as much as possible, if I don't have a drink, I get a dry mouth, feel sick, and panic :rolleyes:
That's resulted in me not being able to work, which is a pain, as I'm now getting into stupid sleep patterns, getting up at silly times in the afternoon :mad: and not being able to sleep til the birds start singing.
I've also been suffering from depression, from not being able to go out, and constantly feeling ill.
I've been to the doctors about 50 times in the last 6 months, and I think they're starting to think I'm putting it on, as I can never describe my symptoms to them (from being ridiculously shy, and not being able to discuss it with strangers), but they have prescribed me lots of different things (Diazepam, which I was advised by the doctor not to take, and that having them in the house would be enough to stop the panic, Propranolol, to lower my blood pressure, which hasn't made me feel any better, and I've since finished the course, and a few antacids)
Since then, I've seen a Hypnotherapist, who has managed to stop me needing a bottle of drink when I go out, and I seem to have more confidence (I've been into town for no real reason this week, just to get out and about) BUT, I still have the attacks at home.
He seems to think it all stems from the death of my Father 4 years ago, from cancer of the eusophagus, as my symptoms are 99% similar to his (I was living at home while he was ill, so I saw everything). This seems reasonable to me, as the thought has crossed my mind (months ago) that I had the same disease, which resulted in lots of blood tests and scans to set my mind at ease.
I didn't mourn at the time, as I was left the only child (of 3) at home with my Mother, and felt like I had to hold it together for her, and help her through it.
I think that is a major part of my suffering, as well as the hurt and knocking of confidence that I took when my girlfriend of 18 months cheated on me on holiday 2.5 years ago, I've not really got over that yet, which was the root of my shyness.
I'm not realy sure if that's relevent to the panic attacks, but I thought I'd be open about it just incase.
Sorry for the long first post, I seem to have got carried away, but it was good to get it off my chest, as I struggle to talk about it to 'real' people, if that makes sense.
I hope this site helps me, I've had a look around, and it's good to know that I'm not alone.
Robin.
I'm not really sure where to start about the problems I've been having recently, so I'll just list them randomly, not really sure where to post them either, I hope it's ok in here, if not, if someone can point me in the right direction, go ahead.
I have severe Emetophobia (although, that said, I suppose you can't have it mildly) and every time I feel ill, even indigestion, I panic, assuming that I'm going to be sick. (this is the reason for me being awake at 4am on a Sunday)
This has also cause sort of mild Agorophobia, basically, I ALWAYS have to have a drink with me when I go out, so I avoid it as much as possible, if I don't have a drink, I get a dry mouth, feel sick, and panic :rolleyes:
That's resulted in me not being able to work, which is a pain, as I'm now getting into stupid sleep patterns, getting up at silly times in the afternoon :mad: and not being able to sleep til the birds start singing.
I've also been suffering from depression, from not being able to go out, and constantly feeling ill.
I've been to the doctors about 50 times in the last 6 months, and I think they're starting to think I'm putting it on, as I can never describe my symptoms to them (from being ridiculously shy, and not being able to discuss it with strangers), but they have prescribed me lots of different things (Diazepam, which I was advised by the doctor not to take, and that having them in the house would be enough to stop the panic, Propranolol, to lower my blood pressure, which hasn't made me feel any better, and I've since finished the course, and a few antacids)
Since then, I've seen a Hypnotherapist, who has managed to stop me needing a bottle of drink when I go out, and I seem to have more confidence (I've been into town for no real reason this week, just to get out and about) BUT, I still have the attacks at home.
He seems to think it all stems from the death of my Father 4 years ago, from cancer of the eusophagus, as my symptoms are 99% similar to his (I was living at home while he was ill, so I saw everything). This seems reasonable to me, as the thought has crossed my mind (months ago) that I had the same disease, which resulted in lots of blood tests and scans to set my mind at ease.
I didn't mourn at the time, as I was left the only child (of 3) at home with my Mother, and felt like I had to hold it together for her, and help her through it.
I think that is a major part of my suffering, as well as the hurt and knocking of confidence that I took when my girlfriend of 18 months cheated on me on holiday 2.5 years ago, I've not really got over that yet, which was the root of my shyness.
I'm not realy sure if that's relevent to the panic attacks, but I thought I'd be open about it just incase.
Sorry for the long first post, I seem to have got carried away, but it was good to get it off my chest, as I struggle to talk about it to 'real' people, if that makes sense.
I hope this site helps me, I've had a look around, and it's good to know that I'm not alone.
Robin.