Where did they all go?

[CherryRed12]

When I went to college, I really struggled. Looking back, I can see that it was the hundreds of new people, the new environment, the new classes but at the time, I wanted nothing more than to run away. I dropped out after a year of skipping classes, and went from an A* GCSE student to receiving 4 U's.

Dropping out cost me by best friend. She'd settled in well. I made a couple of friends at my new college, but nothing long term. It's not been four years since I dropped out, and I've recently got back in touch with my old best friend but obviously it's not like it used to be. I'm now engaged, working in a supermarket at home while she lives away with her boyfriend in Nottingham.

She started speaking to me, but now I'm the one who initiates conversation every time. I feel like I'm annoying her. I always get a response but it's sometimes a conversation ender. After having no-one for almost four years, I was so excited that she reached out to me, but now I can honestly cry every night when she doesn't message me.

I hate being so clingy. I hate being so dependant. My fiancee says she clearly wants to be my friend, or she wouldn't even message back, but my anxiety says otherwise.

Anyone with any experience with this sort of thing would be very welcome :blush:

[Oosh]

Electronic communication is hard and it's easy to get insecure. Can't you arrange to visit her and hang out ? There's a lot less left to the imagination if you're in person.

It's hard when you lose touch with your early friends. I moved city and would love to have a couple of those friendships back. My best friend lives in Australia now and I still miss him now years later. I envy the people who are able to keep those early friendships