Anxiety for 4+ years. Terrified to start citalopram, helpful advice please

[Lynzad]

Hi, I've had bad anxiety for over four years now. It wasn't connected to anything just a random first panic attack one day ended up in a&e and that was enough for the seed to settle. I'm only 25 and feel like I've missed out on so much already due to anxiety, I don't like to be home alone or go out alone but at same time I'll only go to places I know with a small handful of people, mainly only family now as they understand and I'm too embarrassed to tell friends.

I've had cbt but gained nothing, I didn't connect with councillor so waiting for another referral. I've been scared to start ssri just because all you seem to hear online is horrible stories so I went on 75mg of preganlin 3 times a day which took the edge off anxiety but I just know how I'm feeling now isn't right and I just want to feel half normal again and have a normal life because I don't feel like I ever will now.

I was given 20mg citalopram two months ago and I still haven't started them, made the mistake of looking online to see best time to take them and was hit with horror stories. I know people in real life who have taken them and been fine and worked brilliant but I still can't get past assuming the worst.

My doctor has put it down to health anxiety since my thoughts all lead to fear of dying so the idea of side effects is something that really worries me, especially palpitations.

I realise this has turned into a rambling essay but I struggle to get stuff across properly because it's not something I ever talk about

I just wondered if anyone had experience with citalopram that would be helpful? I feel like people only ever leave bad reviews of everything in life and like to wallow in stuff so I'm only seeing the worst.

Thanks

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[MyNameIsTerry]

Hi and welcome to NMP :welcome:

Yes, the internet is full of horror stories about every antidepressant in existence. My advice would be to avoid the internet and read the threads on this board. NMP is quite well balanced and whilst you will still see people having a hard time, you will see the support they get from people with experience of getting beyond the side effects and being on this med longer term.

I did struggle going onto this med but a large part of that was the fact my GP didn't prepare me so I sunk very quickly. The second time around I have gone onto a SNRI and the side effects have been far worse but I didn't sink because I knew this is how it goes for some of us and it's better to get half way and keep pushing through than withdraw and start again, which can be the same.

I found the side effects started to reduce a lot by week 3.

Honestly, you are only saying what probably all of us have ever said. 20mg is the old fashioned way to start, like my GP, and people on here with more clued up GP's have started them on 10mg. That way you get a feel for the side effects you will have but when you increase to 20mg you may see it more pronounced (some do) and not muc at all (again some are like this). It's too individual to predict but this way means you can start at a dosage that is less likely to bring a more intense level of side effects and I wish GP's would get their heads around things like this as it's just common sense with these meds!

[pulisa]

Definitely half the dose to 10mg if you decide to start citalopram. I can't believe GPs still aren't aware that they should not prescribe the full starting dose to begin with.

It's a hard decision to make as to whether to take meds or not and not one to be taken lightly. These are very powerful drugs but they could vastly improve the quality of your life provided that you have some therapy alongside the meds. Side effects are common but often pass after the start-up period of around 2 weeks but some people are unlucky and just can't tolerate the drugs at all.

Managing an anxiety disorder can be very challenging as there are so many uncertainties and tolerating meds or not is just another worry to add to the pile. I would only advise you not to take 20mg if you decide to start-10mg would be a more appropriate starting dose.

[lilann1012]

I think everyone wonders about the side effects of medication. Youve gotten lots of good advice from the replies you've gotten so far. So I will kind of expand on that. First of starting with 10 milligrams is a great idea. It will ease you into the medication and a low dose will make you feel more in control of your med. management. No matter what, don't go on the Internet to check out side effects. You'll never want to take a aspirin again, everyone has horror stories to tell about all kinds of medications.

Next ask yourself what do you have to lose by taking the medication? If you did have a side effect try another medication. Giving the medication a chance to work may be the best decision you've ever ever made! Im not going to get into my issues, but, I am all for medication in dealing with anxiety, OCD, depression. If you had diabetes you'd take something for it wouldn't you? I'm going to tell you this, you're going to be ok trying it out and seeing how it goes. Give it a chance and good luck!

[Shazamataz]

Taking medication for anxiety is a difficult one because many of us are anxious about taking it and things can go round in circles!

I've been on and off SSRIs most of my adult life and never had any real issues until my current start up and that may be due to many factors of changing drugs and other meds I am taking. I'd say there's no harm giving it a crack, but definitely start for a week on 10 mg to ease your way in. They can increase your anxiety and the GP should have prepared you for this and perhaps given you something to help with this temporarily.

Good luck!