songbird717
21-12-15, 22:01
Ok, so I've always had a fear of cold sores/herpes, but due to a potential exposure I've been freaking out and obsessing to a point where over the past day or so it's really been effecting my ability to function and be productive. I feel so hopeless and depressed. Something about the non-curable nature freaks me out and makes me feel like it's all over for me, even though I don't even have one (yet). I know that oral herpes/cold sores are very common and I know that most people are exposed to the virus at a very young age and most never develop symptoms, but lately I've become obsessed with the fact that I may have been exposed. I'm 29 years old and am going through a divorce. I have this horrible fear that I will contract cold sores now and it will make being single really complicated for me. I know that this is not really a huge deal because so many people get them, but it really scares me.
So I am a performing artist and 10 days ago in the last production I was in, there was a scene where my scene partner has a drink of water on stage. I was feeling really dry so I decided to drink from her glass before my number (about 2 minutes after she drank from the glass). I've always been freaked out about cold sores and sharing glasses, so I made a point to turn the glass so I was drinking from the side that did not have her very obvious lipstick marks.
2 days later, she developed a cold sore under her nose and since then, I've been obsessed with the fear that she might have spread it to me. It's like my worst fear came true! (I mean that's why I turned the glass and didn't drink from her side, but maybe some saliva got in the water!) I can't seem to find consistent info online either. Some sources say that the virus dies after 10 second in open air, some says that it can be spread on glasses and can live for up to 4 hours. I've been feeling tingling and itching and burning all around my lips for days, but that could be because I read about that and now I'm manifesting those symptoms. I examine every little spot or discoloration a million times a day. Today I had a spot near the bottom outline of my lip that looked a little redder than the rest (I may have been subconsciously chewing on it but I don't know), so I kept examining it and freaking out. Now it looks fine, but I keep focusing my mind on the spot and I feel like it's tingling and burning. I'm so scared.
I know that in the big scheme of things, this is not a big deal. By 29 years old, I'm sure I've come in contact with the virus before. My grandmother and my cousins get cold sores and if it's as easy to contract while you're young and your immune system isn't as strong, I'm sure this isn't the first time I could have been exposed. I'm so scared though.
So I am a performing artist and 10 days ago in the last production I was in, there was a scene where my scene partner has a drink of water on stage. I was feeling really dry so I decided to drink from her glass before my number (about 2 minutes after she drank from the glass). I've always been freaked out about cold sores and sharing glasses, so I made a point to turn the glass so I was drinking from the side that did not have her very obvious lipstick marks.
2 days later, she developed a cold sore under her nose and since then, I've been obsessed with the fear that she might have spread it to me. It's like my worst fear came true! (I mean that's why I turned the glass and didn't drink from her side, but maybe some saliva got in the water!) I can't seem to find consistent info online either. Some sources say that the virus dies after 10 second in open air, some says that it can be spread on glasses and can live for up to 4 hours. I've been feeling tingling and itching and burning all around my lips for days, but that could be because I read about that and now I'm manifesting those symptoms. I examine every little spot or discoloration a million times a day. Today I had a spot near the bottom outline of my lip that looked a little redder than the rest (I may have been subconsciously chewing on it but I don't know), so I kept examining it and freaking out. Now it looks fine, but I keep focusing my mind on the spot and I feel like it's tingling and burning. I'm so scared.
I know that in the big scheme of things, this is not a big deal. By 29 years old, I'm sure I've come in contact with the virus before. My grandmother and my cousins get cold sores and if it's as easy to contract while you're young and your immune system isn't as strong, I'm sure this isn't the first time I could have been exposed. I'm so scared though.