Christmas fear / excitement

[Traceypo]

Hi all, been doing so well lately, back to work, being more rational and trying to get my anxiety under control.
Christmas is a difficult time, my problem is I get too excited for it, I then confuse the excitement for fear and now I'm sitting here shaking feeling frightened of something that should be a fantastic time.
I can't eat, my mouth feels so dry, I'm scared about going to the pantomime this afternoon. My body feels heavy and I want to sleep.
Please help me give my head a shake, I hate feeling like this, my little boy is so excited and I want to join in too.
Does anyone else confuse excitement with fear?
Merry Christmas all xxx

[MyNameIsTerry]

Yeah Tracey. I can remember discussing this at the walk-in groups. I would worry that any excitement would "spill over" and become some form of anxiety attack.

It's an association thing. If your list of symptoms includes something you could experience in a positive situation, you can have this battle on your hands. Just look at the amount of us that worry about being breathless from exercise yet the body can handle that no problem but because it's a symptom of panic, it's on the radar, a possible trigger.

I think the way out of these situations, as in the case of a member signature I've seen on here, is through them. The more you retrain yourself to know it's ok to feel like that, the less it is remembered as a symptom of the disorder. The more you move in that direction, the more you pull yourself out of it all.

And perhaps some breathing techniques to ease it off?

Merry Xmas and I hope you & your little boy have a fantastic time at the panto. Your anxiety is "behind you" (:whistles:) and thats where you are leaving him...good luck and well done getting back to work!

[Traceypo]

Thanks Terry, I'm going to have to work hard at the retraining as I've got Disneyland next year, I'll be a nervous wreck.
On a positive note, I'm not avoiding things that will make me anxious, I'm the one booking them.
The adrenaline has gone now, still a little shaky but I know that will go soon enough.
You have a lovely Christmas too xx

[MyNameIsTerry]

Thats great news, wanting to do things is so powerful rather than having to put up with doing them or doing thinsg feeling the negative guilt.

Disneyland will be amazing. My brothers been to the US one and said it was great. Your little boy will love it!

It's good that it's calming down. I think you know from going through all this that if it was really bad it could be all day non stop so coming & going, whilst still unpleasant, you can deal with and not let it get in the way. It's all progress and it will just keep getting better for you.

[snowflake293]

I can relate to this.

My general anxiety (not health anxiety) has been bad this week and I know some of it is cause I confuse feelings of excitement with feelings of fear/dread.

I have been unwell for the past few weeks and it all came to a head a few days ago so I feel pretty wiped out. My parter works during the day so when I am off work/at home it gets worse cause I am just sat here thinking about it :(

I hope you manage to have a good Christmas regardless. At the moment I feel like crawling under a duvet and staying there 'til January lol! I am gonna get on with it though.

I find distraction really helps, a nice soothing Christmas film like some of the crappy ones they put on Channel 5 :)

Its such a difficult time of year for anyone with anxiety or a mental health problem because there is this expectation to be happy and merry and sometimes we just feel like hiding away.

Right now I feel physically sick, have pains in my sides, dizziness, headache. had to force my breakfast down cause I know I need to eat. I feel shocking - but I KNOW it will pass!

I totally understand how you feel and you aren't alone xx

[eternally optimistic]

I sympathize with all you say.

Tired and a heavy body is always a worrying time for me.

I think sometimes you think you're anxious when you could be excited!!!!

I try and tell myself its excitement!!!

---------- Post added at 12:18 ---------- Previous post was at 12:16 ----------

Forgot to say have a great time at panto.

A bit of booing and hissing should get you right....... Great distraction..

Have fun.

[Traceypo]

I've tried smiling and laughing when I feel like that to try and tell my brain it's a happy feeling.
Xxx

[Traceypo]

Update - nearly one year later
I no longer confuse these emotions. I now feel true excitement and I can't explain how wonderful that feels to me. I'm so excited for Christmas and I'm not allowing myself to get stressed about it as I now know that what I thought was important is irrelevant and the only thing that matters is I'm spending it with my family and I'll be there in both body and mind.
It's been an amazing and weird year, my operation being the making not the end of me. Everyday I make progress and try not to dwell to much on what I can't change.
I've dealt with my anxiety, faced my demons, successfully quit smoking. I'm not where I want to be yet, I still need to exercise more, cut back on my drinking and lose a stone or two but I know now that I can do this.
I grow everyday as a person, partner and mother and I'm discovering emotions long suppressed and forgotten.
For all reading this, there is a better day and I hope you all find your way there.
Xxx

[Massive worrier]

Yes, definitely! Iv always feel like my time will be up at Xmas. With no reason for it!

Well done for not letting it stop you! Do you often find that when your there the anxiety reduces and you enjoy yourself? I'm always amazed at how anxious I get and then realise I can handle things so much better than I thought!

Has anyone looked at any ACT therapy? I can't remember if you have to tell yourself I am excited over and over again or the opposite and you start to believe it to either be true or silly... Need to look up the details... Heard it works for a lot of people though! Might be worth a try!

---------- Post added at 10:58 ---------- Previous post was at 10:55 ----------

Oops sorry I missed your recent post!

Love to hear a recovery story! Well done and thank you, will continue and hope to be in a similar place soon!

[Traceypo]

I would smile or laugh when I was doing something that should be happy /excited to try to teach myself not to be so scared.
Never give up fighting it.
Xxx

[MyNameIsTerry]

You're an inspiration to people on here, Tracey, a role model.

It's great to see you breaking down all the old thinking and changing.

I too have problems with the excitement symptoms issue, exposure and working in my thoughts has helped me but I still have things to sort. I read your threads and I can see you "get it" at both a conscious & subconscious level, something we are all striving for!

Give us an update on how it goes if you get chance, I'm sure we will be grateful to see it turns out the positive experience we expect.

:yahoo:

[Traceypo]

Thanks Terry, I will update after Christmas.
It's been a hard slog but I've reached a level of contentment and acceptance and have gave up my unachievable goals of perfection!
I'm kinder to myself and allow myself to make mistakes instead of causing myself so much stress trying to make everything perfect.
Xxx

[SLA]

Update - nearly one year later
I no longer confuse these emotions. I now feel true excitement and I can't explain how wonderful that feels to me. I'm so excited for Christmas and I'm not allowing myself to get stressed about it as I now know that what I thought was important is irrelevant and the only thing that matters is I'm spending it with my family and I'll be there in both body and mind.
It's been an amazing and weird year, my operation being the making not the end of me. Everyday I make progress and try not to dwell to much on what I can't change.
I've dealt with my anxiety, faced my demons, successfully quit smoking. I'm not where I want to be yet, I still need to exercise more, cut back on my drinking and lose a stone or two but I know now that I can do this.
I grow everyday as a person, partner and mother and I'm discovering emotions long suppressed and forgotten.
For all reading this, there is a better day and I hope you all find your way there.
Xxx

Wow. Got a bit emotional reading that. :blush:

YES! Confusing feelings and emotions is SO common in anxiety.

Am I anxious... excited... nervous... or hungry? All so similar.

Tired... Depressed... Ill... Lazy?


So many times I have let hunger manifest itself as anxiety. Then you don't eat, and you get more hungry. Which makes you feel more anxious... then you still don't eat, and you get tired. So you stay in bed.... still can't eat... am I depressed? :doh: That is how easily it can get out of control.

Observing yourself without any thought or judgement. Learning to properly explore your feelings and emotions for what they are.

So great reading this and you have inspired me.

[KeeKee]

A lovely read Traceypo. Hope things continue to keep getting better.

[Traceypo]

Wow. Got a bit emotional reading that. :blush:

YES! Confusing feelings and emotions is SO common in anxiety.

Am I anxious... excited... nervous... or hungry? All so similar.

Tired... Depressed... Ill... Lazy?


So many times I have let hunger manifest itself as anxiety. Then you don't eat, and you get more hungry. Which makes you feel more anxious... then you still don't eat, and you get tired. So you stay in bed.... still can't eat... am I depressed? :doh: That is how easily it can get out of control.

Observing yourself without any thought or judgement. Learning to properly explore your feelings and emotions for what they are.

So great reading this and you have inspired me.

You're so right, once I'd accepted my thoughts had got me into that mess I was able to realise that more positive and rational thoughts could help me get out of it.
That's what I love about this forum, as members words, actions and advice can really make a difference. There are so many on here who helped me on my journey, inspirational words and replies that made me look more into my own behaviours and the impact they were having on my mental health.

KeeKee, thank you hun.
Xxx

[pulisa]

It's so good that you've turned your life around and are so much happier now. You've achieved so much and should be very proud of yourself. It must feel really liberating to have literally cast off your "shackles"! xx

[Traceypo]

It's so good that you've turned your life around and are so much happier now. You've achieved so much and should be very proud of yourself. It must feel really liberating to have literally cast off your "shackles"! xx

Thank you, I just wish there was one 'fix' for all as I really do empathise with all who are struggling with anxiety.
I feel freedom, instigated mainly by being nicotine free and I don't fear the unknown as much.
Xxx

[Sam Winter]

Decembers are definitely the longest months for me, I don't eat as well as I do when I'm facing my choking phobia because I don't want to die beforehand, I go to the doctors more often and get more scared about my side pains ect, because you guessed I especially don't want to die during that time, it almost seems like its more of struggle staying alive for it, it can be draining lol x

[Traceypo]

Decembers are definitely the longest months for me, I don't eat as well as I do when I'm facing my choking phobia because I don't want to die beforehand, I go to the doctors more often and get more scared about my side pains ect, because you guessed I especially don't want to die during that time, it almost seems like its more of struggle staying alive for it, it can be draining lol x

Sorry Sam, just saw this. I think the colder darker months are always the hardest as we tend to stay in more and lack daylight hours. I used to have a similar thoughts so I'd distance myself from loved ones as in my head I thought that would make it easier for them when I was gone!
Xxx