Facebook anxiety and self esteem

[GirlAfraid23]

I know it's pathetic but everytime I endeavour to put a picture up on facebook I get zero to two or three likes on it I know it's a "first world problem" issue but I find it upsets me and brings out my self esteem issues.
I took a photo earlier today (yes a selfie but I rarely take them) and thought it looked quite nice so I put it on facebook as my profile picture.
I have received four likes for the picture itself on instagram but only one for the profile picture. Others get a ridiculous amount of likes and comments and I bet people see my picture with one like and think how sad I am.

I'm starting to think people really dislike me or I'm very ugly :(

[lindadiana]

its neither that your ugly or no one likes you,facebook is a terrible place if your lonely or family live a long way off etc,my daughter is 16 and you sond just like her,she is convinced shes ugly,even my 21 year old does,and even myself,im 57 and nobody comments on anything I put on there, very rarely they might,i feel ugly abnormal,its a horrible feeling,everyones seems to be in relationships and appear happy,i know this is not a true picture of plenty on there,(it seems like its only for shiny happy people with lots oof rubbish to share,but it still gets to me,it makes me feel unlovable undatable unworthy and useless,if I post anything about world issues most don't say a word if I share a picture of something unimportant they comment,so my advice is stay off facebook,i don't go on very often anymore,only if my eldest daughter says did you see what I put on your page etc,my daughers nearly 40 and she puts mainly crap on ther sharing ridiculous things that do not matter,and gets loads of likes,she is addicted to it,so it can effect people of all ages in differents ways,for me ive been single for so many years and seeing couples makes me cry,as I want to be a part of a couple more than anything

[rainwinder]

I have the same feeling too.
Other people post thing on fb and get a lot of likes and comments, but for me only one to two like.
And I seldom post things on fb now, and its not important, I have real life friends, I leant that virtual thing is not that important now.

[MyNameIsTerry]

its neither that your ugly or no one likes you,facebook is a terrible place if your lonely or family live a long way off etc,my daughter is 16 and you sond just like her,she is convinced shes ugly,even my 21 year old does,and even myself,im 57 and nobody comments on anything I put on there, very rarely they might,i feel ugly abnormal,its a horrible feeling,everyones seems to be in relationships and appear happy,i know this is not a true picture of plenty on there,(it seems like its only for shiny happy people with lots oof rubbish to share,but it still gets to me,it makes me feel unlovable undatable unworthy and useless,if I post anything about world issues most don't say a word if I share a picture of something unimportant they comment,so my advice is stay off facebook,i don't go on very often anymore,only if my eldest daughter says did you see what I put on your page etc,my daughers nearly 40 and she puts mainly crap on ther sharing ridiculous things that do not matter,and gets loads of likes,she is addicted to it,so it can effect people of all ages in differents ways,for me ive been single for so many years and seeing couples makes me cry,as I want to be a part of a couple more than anything

Linda,

I know what you mean. Social media is largely "kiddie speak". If you want n adult discussion you need to head for forums. I find forums are much better for more indepth debates although some are like FB, Twitter e.g. Digital Spy.I was on MSE before here and they had a specific forum set up for more serious debates and they were very indepth and often got quite heated. Better than the "OMG look who's dating who" garbage on typical social media.

And hopefully without sounding creepy, you have a photo on your profile page on here and you are a very attractive lady! Whats inside counts more.

---------- Post added at 03:50 ---------- Previous post was at 03:44 ----------

GirlAfraid23 - social media has many tricks. At my last workplace there were hundreds of people who accepted friends on their FB literally to show how popular they were. These people were all of different levels, some of them professionals who wouldn't ever speak to the people they "friended" when at work. Some of us not involved in all that scene would say how ludicrous we thought it was.

It's just about people appearing to be popular. The more friends, the more likes, the wider or more popular your associations are, the more likes. It's typical of networking or even market surveying, the more chance from the more attempts to get a response or better targeting.

I find it all incredibly sad. People at my last workplace would take a photo of what they ate for breakfast and have it on their page. I used to laugh at the ones who updated their page to say they were on holiday away from their homes...any local burglars must have been very happy. :D

Making comparisons to others is something a therapist will tell you to avoid. You will make mistakes, you won't know the true picture as you are not a mind reader and your distortions/bias due to your anxiety/depression will further steer you away from an objective view.

It's a waste of energy. And having one amazing friend is 1000000% better than having 500 poor ones.

[uru]

Maybe you aren't cute. Would that be so bad?

[unsure_about_this]

I rarely post anything on my wall anyway as I don't use FB much. As for groups I have joined a group of the secondary school I went to, when FB when through an update and a lot of groups went

but at the moment I am too scared to post a comment in the group thing (really waiting to see if a photo featuring me in the form I were in. gave a few likes to some comments. I know there are at least 15 people I went to school with in the group.

I think very careful what I post on FB and prefer really photos of me not being featured.

[Chocolateface]

I don't get many likes on fb either but am not bothered by it, to be honest I do get fed up of reading what everyone had for lunch or watching another clip of a cat etc. I actually use fb as a reminder for birthdays or contacting a couple of friends who live abroad so calling would be inappropriate.

Clare