Revalibur
13-01-16, 12:06
Hey there, fellow sufferers, do-gooders, samaritans and nice people,
I am a, 24 year old young man.
I would like to be a little bit of diagnosed by you. I know the real-life docter is the one to do that, but I've been there already and I have found a little good help at a psychologist, daily mindfulness (if I can get myself that far), positive thinking and screaming "LIFE IS GOOD" as a mantra in my head when creepy thoughts arise. But I still want to see if anybody recognizes my issues.
To the point then: I'm having panic attacks for about two years now. In the beginning I didn't know what hit me, then it dissapeared for a while, then I made some stupid, stressful mistakes in life and then it came back accompanied with more.
It came back with a nagging sense of not a just panic, but pure dread. It went worse and suddenly I began to worry for suicide a lot. And then I mean a really big lot. Accompanied with existential worries when time moved on (I am in this body? What am I here for? What does a life on earth matter when it's dying anyway?), panic attacks and feelings of dread worsened over time. I became really afraid that I was becoming suicidal, because of the feeling of dread, and due to a lack of coping system, my brain decided to try and find solace in the bigger picture AKA the universe, which kind of worsened it.
Now I have posted this as a GAD thread, because panic attacks are common for me for about 2 years now, but the thoughts.. is this OCD? I cannot simply stop them. Anybody recognize this behaviour?
Is this what a suicidal person goes through? Or am I "simply going mad", in a good non-lethal way?
I'm having a couple of other symptoms, but before I'm making this post any longer I'm curious if there even will be response to it. (I've always avoided online-communities, so this is a first!)
Thanks for reading this and I hope anybody can tell me something about it.
I am a, 24 year old young man.
I would like to be a little bit of diagnosed by you. I know the real-life docter is the one to do that, but I've been there already and I have found a little good help at a psychologist, daily mindfulness (if I can get myself that far), positive thinking and screaming "LIFE IS GOOD" as a mantra in my head when creepy thoughts arise. But I still want to see if anybody recognizes my issues.
To the point then: I'm having panic attacks for about two years now. In the beginning I didn't know what hit me, then it dissapeared for a while, then I made some stupid, stressful mistakes in life and then it came back accompanied with more.
It came back with a nagging sense of not a just panic, but pure dread. It went worse and suddenly I began to worry for suicide a lot. And then I mean a really big lot. Accompanied with existential worries when time moved on (I am in this body? What am I here for? What does a life on earth matter when it's dying anyway?), panic attacks and feelings of dread worsened over time. I became really afraid that I was becoming suicidal, because of the feeling of dread, and due to a lack of coping system, my brain decided to try and find solace in the bigger picture AKA the universe, which kind of worsened it.
Now I have posted this as a GAD thread, because panic attacks are common for me for about 2 years now, but the thoughts.. is this OCD? I cannot simply stop them. Anybody recognize this behaviour?
Is this what a suicidal person goes through? Or am I "simply going mad", in a good non-lethal way?
I'm having a couple of other symptoms, but before I'm making this post any longer I'm curious if there even will be response to it. (I've always avoided online-communities, so this is a first!)
Thanks for reading this and I hope anybody can tell me something about it.