Other people's opinions holding me back from what I want to do

[white1989]

I've always been worried about what Other people think of me from a very young age and I think that's just a part of my anxiety. I've began to notice over the last few years that I'm incredibly worried about what people think of me. Since leaving uni 4 years ago, I'm constantly comparing myself to friends and worrying that my life isn't as good as theirs, mainly to do with jobs etc. I'm always looking at uni friends' lives on Facebook and thinking I'm totally inadequate; I have a good degree from a good university and I know I'm intelligent and have a good job now but it's not what I want to do and it doesn't make me happy. There's so much pressure to feel like I need to keep up with my uni friends and have an amazing job that's really well paid and do all the amazing things I see them doing on social media. The reality is that my life is totally different to theirs because of my anxiety condition, I don't travel and go out anymore like I used to and I don't really do anything without my partner or family because my anxiety just doesn't allow it. I'm always worrying what people are saying about me, that my old 'friends' that I don't see anymore are saying that I'm ignorant and rude and never bother with anyone other than my boyfriend, but I know it's because they don't understand what I'm going through and I shouldn't let their opinions bother me.
I'm not happy in the line of work I do at the moment and have decided to follow a dream which I've had for a number of years, which is to retrain as a beauty therapist. The one thing which is holding me back is everyone's opinions on this decision. I'm totally hindered by the worry of all my old friends and uni classmates saying that I'm a drop out, a failure, lost my mind because I've got such a good degree but I'm dropping out to decide to train in beauty. My opinion is that life is too short and I need to do what makes me happy, but I'm sadly held back by the worry of other people's opinions. Why am I like this and how can I overcome it? :( i wish I was a stronger person that could push other people's opinions aside and do what makes me happy, but I'm really struggling to do that.

[uru]

it's totally natural to compare yourself with others, -we all do it.

what I would say is

1) don't compare your real self with their facebook selves.
2) life is long...5 years ago I thought I was 'winning' -look at me now.

Before you 'follow your dream' check out a couple of books
1) what should I do with my life
2) So good they can't ignore you

[KeeKee]

This is me all over. I worry constantly what others think. I hate leaving the house as I think the neighbours will be judging me. I haven't worked or studied for almost 3 years now and my daughter asked me the other day why some people like me don't want to work! So I can only begin to imagine what other people are thinking. I don't have any degrees or anything and have only had 2 jobs both of which are no longer trading so I'd have no references when I eventually start applying for jobs. I do really want to work but at the moment I can't stand interacting with strangers, I'm fine getting served in shops and keeping doors open for people etc, but I have zero interest in others and simply cannot work with members of the public as I have a 'monotone' voice and cannot forge a smile. I won't tell my daughter off in front of people as they judge me (they really do as I have seen them moan about another family member when telling their child off). I don't like giving my opinion as it turns into an argument with my family. I feel judged that I don't drink alcohol, I feel judged that I don't like the type of music or TV programmes that most people do and it's making me too scared to be around new people. This was a big issue in CBT as I was told simply to not care what others think, but I do care and always have so it's not easy just to stop caring.