snowflake293
16-01-16, 17:26
Hi everyone
Not really sure if this post is in the right place but I am my wits end and I dont know what else to do. Had a full on melt down today and really just need to talk to someone about it :(
I have suffered with anxiety, depression and eating disorders for 15 years. Most recently my anxiety has been health anxiety-related, but luckily I am getting over that now. For the first time in a while I feel like I am getting back to normality, however I am planning a wedding and the stress of it all is setting me off big time :(
I'm getting married in 7 months time and today I went with my family today to buy my bridesmaid dresses and I had a total freak out. I ended up throwing up and having the go off by myself for a while. Afterwards I met up with just my Mom and I cried and cried and cried.
I feel so guilty cause there are folk out there far worse off than me but I can't sort my head out!!! The only thing that helps me is drinking. When I drink I feel normal again, or sort of fuzzy and like I don't care.
When I was in the city centre I felt panicky and sweaty. I cant cope with crowds of people and I feel like I am 'zoning out' like I am almost looking down on my body if that makes sense?
This isn't just wedding nerves. I feel like I can't function normally around people who I do not 'trust'. I feel like retreating from everything at the moment! I feel so irritated by people and even things like loud noises are setting me off panicking.
I have had a load of therapy over the last 18 months and I am on sertraline. I had my last appointment with the therapist last week and it went well, so I do feel I am getting better. My upcoming wedding is causing me to feel sick.
All I want to do is run away. I feel so alone. I feel massively paranoid about everything! The only way I can describe it is feeling like an elastic band that had stretched and stretched and has finally snapped.
I am overweight by about 2 stone and I'm a recovering binge eater/occasional purger. I am sensitive about my weight but I pretend not to care. I dont think I look especially bad, but I am just feeling all this pressure to be 'on a diet' cause thats what people do when they get married. I feel like total sh*t. To be honest, I dont even care about 'losing weight' I'd rather just get married in my pjs and not care about it! I can't escape this pressure though... I feel like I am suffocating.
Reading this back it all sounds like utter self-indulgent rubbish. I just feel panicky and lost and I dont know where else to turn. My other half is fantastic and totally supportive but I feel like nobody else understands.
Hoping someone reads this who can relate. I feel so unstable at the moment and I am just necking a load of whiskey even though I know it will do no good. I just want to escape all this sh*t in my head :(
xxx
Not really sure if this post is in the right place but I am my wits end and I dont know what else to do. Had a full on melt down today and really just need to talk to someone about it :(
I have suffered with anxiety, depression and eating disorders for 15 years. Most recently my anxiety has been health anxiety-related, but luckily I am getting over that now. For the first time in a while I feel like I am getting back to normality, however I am planning a wedding and the stress of it all is setting me off big time :(
I'm getting married in 7 months time and today I went with my family today to buy my bridesmaid dresses and I had a total freak out. I ended up throwing up and having the go off by myself for a while. Afterwards I met up with just my Mom and I cried and cried and cried.
I feel so guilty cause there are folk out there far worse off than me but I can't sort my head out!!! The only thing that helps me is drinking. When I drink I feel normal again, or sort of fuzzy and like I don't care.
When I was in the city centre I felt panicky and sweaty. I cant cope with crowds of people and I feel like I am 'zoning out' like I am almost looking down on my body if that makes sense?
This isn't just wedding nerves. I feel like I can't function normally around people who I do not 'trust'. I feel like retreating from everything at the moment! I feel so irritated by people and even things like loud noises are setting me off panicking.
I have had a load of therapy over the last 18 months and I am on sertraline. I had my last appointment with the therapist last week and it went well, so I do feel I am getting better. My upcoming wedding is causing me to feel sick.
All I want to do is run away. I feel so alone. I feel massively paranoid about everything! The only way I can describe it is feeling like an elastic band that had stretched and stretched and has finally snapped.
I am overweight by about 2 stone and I'm a recovering binge eater/occasional purger. I am sensitive about my weight but I pretend not to care. I dont think I look especially bad, but I am just feeling all this pressure to be 'on a diet' cause thats what people do when they get married. I feel like total sh*t. To be honest, I dont even care about 'losing weight' I'd rather just get married in my pjs and not care about it! I can't escape this pressure though... I feel like I am suffocating.
Reading this back it all sounds like utter self-indulgent rubbish. I just feel panicky and lost and I dont know where else to turn. My other half is fantastic and totally supportive but I feel like nobody else understands.
Hoping someone reads this who can relate. I feel so unstable at the moment and I am just necking a load of whiskey even though I know it will do no good. I just want to escape all this sh*t in my head :(
xxx