Help1989
29-01-16, 12:27
I haven't posted or been here for months now. I'd got a hold of my anxiety. Been having cbt and my therapist said she doesn't think I suffer too badly with health anxiety because I do have a lot of real health problems that have been diagnosed over the past few years. That's where my problem is though.. I thought my bowel problems (tmi sorry) were to do with my endometriosis and o could deal with all the pain and problems that came with it. I wasn't anxious or scared. Now after an Mri my gynae says that he doesn't think my problems are anything to do with the endometriosis and that I need more bowel tests. I'm going for a colonoscopy in 3 weeks. I'm back to being petrified now and thinking the worst.. I'm not scared of the procedure cos I had one done around 2 years ago (I'm only in my 20s!!) but of what they might find. I've got all weird symptoms like pain and full feeling in my bum (sorry!!) and a host of other stuff. These are newish (wasn't happening when I had last colonoscopy) so in scared there's a tumour or something there. I can't eat, can't sleep, the pain in my lower back is getting worse. I hate this feeling. I know my fears are quite valid but I wish I could think of a way around freaking out so much. What else could it be other than a death sentence?? I just feel for someone with quite a few health issues I've been dealing with it all quite well but it's the unknown that freaks me out!! I've just come on here for a rant cos I can't go back to tormenting my family with my worries like I used to, it's not fair on them! Had anyone got any advice??