justmebrah
25-02-16, 17:59
I'm scared...
Tore two ligaments in my ankle 3 months ago -- and now I feel like I have a DVT in my calf.
I don't have swelling, but sometimes the skin color of the ankle and foot (when I get out of the shower) is a bit red...and my calf hurts after I stretch it the next day.
I read all over the internet that you need to stretch and build up your muscles after non-weight-bearing for a certain amount of time...and that pain is expected.
Those little follicles near my ankle seem agitated, like red -- it has been dry in the house (about 35-40% humidity), and my other leg is kind of the same, but not as bad. Of course on the injured ankle, I had a walking boot for 2.5 weeks, ankle brace for 2 weeks, and then an ace bandage for like another month. So it kind of makes sense that the hair follicles would be aggrivated.
--
I quit Physical Therapy for my ankle (tore 90% ATFL and partially CFL), because they had me do lunges, and I felt a rip in my quad -- I convinced myself this was a DVT in my upper leg. I pretty much refused to bend my leg for three days after this until I went to the ER and they performed an ultrasound and said I was fine. I don't remember them scanning all the way down to my ankle in the main vein there, so now I'm convinced (for a week or more) that I have a DVT in my calf or ankle.
--
I still cannot do a full calf raise on that side, but every time I feel a bit of pain, I know for sure my mind makes me back off because I'm afraid a blood clot is going to free itself and kill me.
--
The sad part is, it's not even death I'm afraid of -- it's leaving my 6 year old son without a father.
--
This consumes me, it's all I think about.
For years (maybe 5 years or so) I was convinced that I was dying from colerectal cancer. Then I was convinced for 2-3 years that I was dying from throat cancer. Now I'm dying from a DVT...
I have a fear of hospitals and doctors offices -- any time they take my blood pressure there it's like 140 / 100 or worse. If I measure it myself on a sterilized device at a pharmacy, it's like 120/80. As soon as I walk into a doctor's office, I start feeling like I'm going to breath something in and die. When I drive past hospitals, I turn my air conditioning off so I don't get the air inside my car...it's that bad.
--
I know I have an issue with convincing myself I'm dying -- but even people that have issues convincing themselves that they are dying -- get a disorder or disease and die...just because you know you struggle from this disorder doesn't mean that you can't contract some .001% disease and drop dead.
--
Like I said, it's not even death I fear. I am a Christian, I try to leave my anxiety and ask for God's help...but I don't want to be that person that jumps off a building and prays and assumes he'll be ok, because he probably won't. I just don't want to leave my son without a father...and my wife without money to pay for a nice place for him/her to live.
If you have any insight at all, please post it up. I'll be checking for anything, even just a hello.
---------- Post added at 12:59 ---------- Previous post was at 12:40 ----------
Reading more of this forum, I've realized I've had a lot of the same things people are posting about...
The one side of my nose was clogged for a very long time. I assumed this was some type of cancer and I was dying.
In fact, I remember being around the age of 10 and coughing until I threw up once in the sink and I thought I was dying. I hid this from my mother.
Among other various things as well...
But I drive down the road and I see this sign on a billboard that says "Having chest pain, call 911 immediately" -- and I'm just thinking that if I called 911 every time I had chest pain I'd probably have called 911 about a thousand times so far.
The chest pain I get is the worst when I know there's going to be a snow storm that night. Because I know that if I have a heart attack that there's a chance an ambulance won't be able to get to me if I need them.
--
I don't know, maybe I do have a problem ... but that doesn't mean that I can convince myself that rare things don't happen even to those people.
It is weird though, usually a symptom doesn't go away until the next one starts.
Tore two ligaments in my ankle 3 months ago -- and now I feel like I have a DVT in my calf.
I don't have swelling, but sometimes the skin color of the ankle and foot (when I get out of the shower) is a bit red...and my calf hurts after I stretch it the next day.
I read all over the internet that you need to stretch and build up your muscles after non-weight-bearing for a certain amount of time...and that pain is expected.
Those little follicles near my ankle seem agitated, like red -- it has been dry in the house (about 35-40% humidity), and my other leg is kind of the same, but not as bad. Of course on the injured ankle, I had a walking boot for 2.5 weeks, ankle brace for 2 weeks, and then an ace bandage for like another month. So it kind of makes sense that the hair follicles would be aggrivated.
--
I quit Physical Therapy for my ankle (tore 90% ATFL and partially CFL), because they had me do lunges, and I felt a rip in my quad -- I convinced myself this was a DVT in my upper leg. I pretty much refused to bend my leg for three days after this until I went to the ER and they performed an ultrasound and said I was fine. I don't remember them scanning all the way down to my ankle in the main vein there, so now I'm convinced (for a week or more) that I have a DVT in my calf or ankle.
--
I still cannot do a full calf raise on that side, but every time I feel a bit of pain, I know for sure my mind makes me back off because I'm afraid a blood clot is going to free itself and kill me.
--
The sad part is, it's not even death I'm afraid of -- it's leaving my 6 year old son without a father.
--
This consumes me, it's all I think about.
For years (maybe 5 years or so) I was convinced that I was dying from colerectal cancer. Then I was convinced for 2-3 years that I was dying from throat cancer. Now I'm dying from a DVT...
I have a fear of hospitals and doctors offices -- any time they take my blood pressure there it's like 140 / 100 or worse. If I measure it myself on a sterilized device at a pharmacy, it's like 120/80. As soon as I walk into a doctor's office, I start feeling like I'm going to breath something in and die. When I drive past hospitals, I turn my air conditioning off so I don't get the air inside my car...it's that bad.
--
I know I have an issue with convincing myself I'm dying -- but even people that have issues convincing themselves that they are dying -- get a disorder or disease and die...just because you know you struggle from this disorder doesn't mean that you can't contract some .001% disease and drop dead.
--
Like I said, it's not even death I fear. I am a Christian, I try to leave my anxiety and ask for God's help...but I don't want to be that person that jumps off a building and prays and assumes he'll be ok, because he probably won't. I just don't want to leave my son without a father...and my wife without money to pay for a nice place for him/her to live.
If you have any insight at all, please post it up. I'll be checking for anything, even just a hello.
---------- Post added at 12:59 ---------- Previous post was at 12:40 ----------
Reading more of this forum, I've realized I've had a lot of the same things people are posting about...
The one side of my nose was clogged for a very long time. I assumed this was some type of cancer and I was dying.
In fact, I remember being around the age of 10 and coughing until I threw up once in the sink and I thought I was dying. I hid this from my mother.
Among other various things as well...
But I drive down the road and I see this sign on a billboard that says "Having chest pain, call 911 immediately" -- and I'm just thinking that if I called 911 every time I had chest pain I'd probably have called 911 about a thousand times so far.
The chest pain I get is the worst when I know there's going to be a snow storm that night. Because I know that if I have a heart attack that there's a chance an ambulance won't be able to get to me if I need them.
--
I don't know, maybe I do have a problem ... but that doesn't mean that I can convince myself that rare things don't happen even to those people.
It is weird though, usually a symptom doesn't go away until the next one starts.