Overthinking.

[frazm88]

Evening,

My overthinking has recently scared off a female I had been dating.

Now i can't get over the fact I've done it, from the moment I wake up until the moment I get some version of sleep at night it's all I think about.

"What if" thoughts are running wild, wether it be to going back and changing things that happened or her moving on to someone new whilst I'm stuck here wallowing in my own self pity.

This leads to thoughts of will I ever be happy again?! I'm 27, all my friends are settling down and I'm here scaring people off.

I'm not sure if anyone has similar experiences with over thinking, and I wasn't entirely sure what posting this will achieve, but thanks for reading.

[MyNameIsTerry]

I think you are being a bit hard on yourself, a classic anxiety/depression issue, because she was hardly clear in her intentions. She seemed to end it and then keep it going and then nothing again.

Whilst you can work on the issues that led up to that, that shows that she wasn't someone who was going to be decent (in my opinion) as she was unwilling to confront the situation herself.

[frazm88]

Thanks for the reply Terry.

I just can't see the end of this rut currently, I don't usually get hooked up on these things but this time my anxiety seems to have grabbed on to it and it's running wild.

[Chocolateface]

I overthink things too, it is usually why did I say / do that scenarios, and as Terry has said it is part of anxiety. You don't say how long you were together or how old she was, so it could just be a case of not being anxiety but her wanting different things in life.

I can't offer any more advice on overthinking other than to say you are not alone, and you are only 27 which trust me is still plenty of time to find that one special person.

[frazm88]

Thanks for replying.

It was only a month of dating really, it's just hit me pretty hard and the guilt of overthinking has consumed me.

I'm beating myself up over it and I over reacted and completely deleted her off social media.

[Chocolateface]

A month of dating isn't that long so I seriously doubt you scared her off as she would not have had time to get to know you, I hope you are able to meet someone else who understands you.

[frazm88]

Ah we've known each other for 6 years or so on and off.

I don't think it would be fair for me to look for anyone else at the moment.

I was at the Dr's last night for my anxiety and they've gave me Anti d's and I'm getting referred for counselling.

[Chocolateface]

If you had known each other that long maybe she built a image of you then got to know you and she had unrealistic ideas of who you were, if that makes sense. Seriously you sound like a lovely person and trust me women want real men not what hollywood makes us believe they are

[frazm88]

yeah, I think it was maybe more the timing issue more than anything else.

just as well as I'm no where near a hollywood man hah!

[Chocolateface]

What you mean you are real

[frazm88]

What you mean you are real

haha it would appear so.