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skylight2007
04-03-07, 11:55
Hiya there everyone, hope your all a little better.

As the title suggest, I had spend many many years living in fear, suffering from panic , ocd and all kinds of anxieites. The hardest things I had to learn was taken back control in my life, as I had felt all those years I had no control, almost to a point of not knowing who I was. I seem to feel responsible for everyone and any thing and put a hugh burden on myself to fix things for others, when in hindsight lots of things had nothing to do with me.

coping with change meant several things, from taking small risks, like getting into cars, lifts, buses, trains, been able to sleep in the dark, fear of being alone, all these things controlled my life and I knew I had a choice to change, instead of living and exsisting!! I knew I had to get back control in my life and start taking risks to get better.

The only way I can relate this to you all is like a person who wants to stop smoking, you make a plan and your goal is to follow through no matter how hard. At first you want to achieve it, you put your mind to it, you get pass the first day, and you do all you can to distract yourself keep yourself busy and avoid situations that you know you may slip and smoke. You begin to have mild withdrawel symptons, you become irritable, moody, have sleepness nights, a bit of shivering, coughing, etc...... you know your going through these uneasy symptons, but you stick it out. Your cravings get worse on some days and your soooooooo tempted to just have one more cigeratte!! your changing your thoughts, and your keeping strong, you tell yourself you can do it, but the temptation is hard, you have the craving and your fighting it, but you dont give in, you plod along and as days go by you cant believe you've got to week one!!!

Well this is how it was for me. introducing change is hard, and more we do something positive to change the negative the more we increase our chances of getting on with our life without fear. For me anxiety works like the person who is stopping smoking.

What I needed to was feel good about the change, set myself small goals, everyday, and begin to build my confidence and strength. I began to do volunteering, to meet new people, learn new social skills, and build a better self image and begin to like myself a lot more.

I understand how hard it is to change a habit of a life time, because thats how I felt, a habit that took over my life in everyway which way and I believe we all derserve to live our lifes without fear, hard work I know , but we have to begin somewhere.

wishing you all the best in your efforts.

skylight

jo61
04-03-07, 12:52
Hi Skylight, I have found your post truely inspirational. As a smoker I can so relate to it. I hope that one day I'll have the strength to take back control in the way I want to. Keep posting - it's a gem.

davidthegnome
04-03-07, 13:06
Thanks for that great post Skylight. I am also a smoker, so, like Jo, I can definitely relate. You have done very well and have a good positive attitude. Congratulations and well done, I applaud your effort, your strength and your courage. I think I might try volunteering myself.

Good luck and God bless you, keep up the good work!

Dave

skylight2007
04-03-07, 15:53
Hiya there, jo, thank you so much for those lovely words, I really do appreciate it, and I do believe we can all take back control in our lifes.

Dave thanks so much too, it really is hard work, but we will all get there in our time, as for volunteering, its a great way to meet people, building confidence and learning something new, I often encourage those who havent worked for a while due to anxieties to take up some form of volunteering, to give them something to look forward to and even take up evening classes etc....... I really hope you find something you like, there are loads of volunteering opportunities for people to try!!! good luck Dave.

Skylight