Counselling!

[minny]

Hi all!

Today at 3pm I have my 3rd hour long session with my counsellor. My other 2 sessions ran quite smoothly but for some reason, todays appointment is leaving me feeling very anxious and apprehensive. Ive had 4 panic attacks already this morning accompanied with severe nausea and Im working myself into a right state even as I type. Counselling is very new to me so I dont understand why after 2 sessions that went extremely well, I should be feeling this way today. If Im honest, I feel like I would be more comfortable running through my high street shopping center completely naked!!

Im trying to reason with myself relax about the situation but would really appreciate any advice.

Thankyou

Love Minny...xx

[KW]

Hi Minny

I'm sorry you've felt like that this morning. Try drinking some water and maybe listen to some soothing music for an hour, or have a lay down? Just so you can feel a bit more relaxed. I find listening to music really helps me to focus and calm down. Hope you'll feel better soon Minny

KW

[Merlinssister]

Sorry to hear you're having a rough time. Counselling can be unsettling. It can make you start to think about things you didn't want to think about, however sensible it seems to be to do so. The third session can be harder because you're passed the introduction stage, and you're moving to the useful stage, but not quite there yet. Take heart that long term it should be useful, and it will help deal with things. For now be kind to yourself.

[Marc]

I've been there Minny, and it's hard I know. I well remember the powerful emotions that surface before, during and after a session.

I always felt it was my subconcious trying to resist change.... not that knowing that helped any, although I thought it should.

I would love some good counselling again, but finding some that works for me (and I can afford) is not easy.

Had one course many years ago that I found very helpfull, but tried about 5 different ones in recent years, 4 of which have been unsucessful. The 5th one was very pleasant, with a counsellor who was also a spiritual healer. After the 'laying on of hands' at the end she said I was cured, unfortunately it was not quite that simple lol.

Hope you manage to get there ok, and that it goes well, but if not there's always this site to keep you going.... isn't it great to know that NMP is there. :)

Good luck,
Marc

[minny]

Me again!

Thankyou for the supportive comments. Im begining to see and feel how the process of counselling actually works. I just didnt anticipate it making me feel so vulnerable. At the end of my last session a few doors were opened that I had been struggling to keep firmly closed. Maybe thats why I feel so scared and anxious today. I know the counsellor is going to pick up where he left off so maybe if I write down all the things Im facing talking about today it will actually prepare me for my session.
If Im rambling then I apologise.

I have always been a strong, bubbly, confident person but the past 18 months have literally knocked the stuffing out of me. I have lost 6 members of my family to cancer and my dad, having been diagnosed with a rare form of gastro-intestinal sarcoma of the connective tissues has only a few more months left too. I have moved house twice in a year, the first move being from my home in Wales to my now husbands home in Derby and the second from his house to a larger house in a village just outside the city. Shortly after moving to my partners house in the city center we were burgled as we slept. My kids found the mess in the morning and this had a huge impact on me. My partner was working nights at the time and this only fuelled my fears. The hardest thing to deal with was missing all my friends back home. Thats when the feeling of isolation set in. My partner bless him, changed jobs so he could work days and we married on Friday 13th of August this year. No one from my family attended, my dads reasons obvious but several members of my family have never quite forgiven me for moving to Derby in the first place.

I am very calm and reasonable when it comes to dealing with trials and issues but Ive never had so many things to deal with all at the same time. The only way I can describe it is "I feel all tangled up!"

It has helped a little writing all of this down. Lets see how the session goes this afternoon!

Thankyou for listening....Minny..xx

[seh1980]

hello there Minny,

Sorry to hear that you have been getting worked-up about the counselling. I see a counsellor and I remember how nervous I was at first!! Just remember that the first two sessions went really well so I'm sure that it will be the same this time!! Just try to relax and tell yourself that the counsellor is only trying to help you and he/she knows all about anxiety so you have nothing to be scared of. Let us know how it goes, ok?

Sarah :D

[pips]

Hi Minny,

So Sorry to read what a rough time you have had.

It's only natural to feel anxious about seeing a councellor you can end up discussing your most personal emotions so you are bound to feel open and vunerable. Just remember they are here to help you and give you some positive visulization for the future.

I go to CBT every week and I always feel exactly how you have described. I have had 2 sessions as well and I am finding them more draining as I go along. I think this is because you are opening yourself up more. Its hard being able to change things as well as they become such habit.

You are on the right track though, I often feel guilty like I'm wasting her time as I don't really have anything major to have caused the panic and anxiety in the first place. I find though if I do write down how I am feeling my worries and concerns and show her it does help enormously.

I hope it goes well and I wish you the best of luck!

Let us know how it goes for you.

Take care

Love PIP'S XX XX

[Meg]

Hi Minnie,

I think you figured it out yourself .....

I hope today went well and you were able to write things down in preparation.

Much counselling can be very probing and it can turn out to be very intrusive. You can call a for a break at any time in the session if its too overwhelming .






Meg

It is impossible to get out of a problem by using the same kind of thinking that it took to get into it.
- Albert Einstein.

[minny]

Ive been 16 days without a drink now and its days like today you realise what a prop alcohol can be. I would give anything at the moment to have just one glass of wine but unfortunately, I dont yet trust myself to stop at just one!

Ive listened to what all of you have had to say and its helped enormously. I am very grateful to you all. Ive written down everything I feel I need to say ready for my counsellor and now Im off! Session 3 here I come!

Love Minny...xxx

[Meg]

Well done Minnie on keeping off the booze.

Meg

[Sue]

Sorry you have a bad day but I hope it went well.

I used to get really worked up before seeing my councillor, but now it doesnt bother me at all, think I have just got used to it. Plus its good to have someone to talk to who really understands.

Let us know how you got on?

Sue

[Karen]

Hi Minny

I hope the counselling session went okay.

I also get quite worked up before my sessions and I think what others have said is true. We are often facing difficult issues and it is only natural to worry about this beforehand. I also get very anxious because I get panicky about the possibility of having to talk. I have social phobia and talking is the worst part of it for me. I still communicate with her by writing at present but before every session I panic that this could be the time she will push me to talk and not allow me to write anymore.

Briary

[ophelia]

i really hope you feel better soon...counciling never worked for me, all I have is my poetry which helps me empty the thoughts inside my head

do you meditate, maybe this would be helpful...sending you good vibes

when does an obsession become a compulsive disorder

[Merlinssister]

Considering what you've been through minny, you sound amazingly together! Hope the counselling went okay today.

[Caz Fab Pants]

AMEN Merlinssister!!!

Minny - Dont think you are giving yourself credit where credit is most definitely and undoubtably due!!! Most people would be gibbering wrecks after going through just half of what you've been through lately. I'm amazed you have held it together so well, you must be a very strong and able person.

Hopefully you're going to win the lottery or have something equally fantastic happen to you over the next few years, you deserve it.

Caroline :)
x

[minny]

Hi all!

Well what a day! I have learned so much in such a short space of time and I have you all to thank for much of that! :)

My session today was a tough one as issues were raised that I really didnt feel comfortable discussing. This is where my 3 sheets of A4 came into play. Writing everything down beforehand helped me AND my counsellor so much. Once my counsellor had been put in the picture he approached my difficult issues in a way that gently eased me into talking about them. I could feel the panic rising inside me but it was much easier to control than it was earlier in the morning.

My counsellor has now set me 2 tasks. The first is to attempt to attend my daughters parent/teacher interveiw ( these are normally done over the phone!!) and the other was to invite one of the mums at the school who has shown concern about my wellbeing to my house for a coffee!

I will give both tasks my best shot and I feel that with the support given to me from everyone in here.......

I can achieve anything!!! :)

Thankyou all so very much!

Love Minny...xxx

[sal]

Hi Minny

Without the drink and talking to a counsellor, give yourself credit for how well you have done.

Well proud of you.



Love Sal xxxxx