Bohophobo
30-03-16, 01:47
Hi, im 28 yrs old female and ive had bipolar depression and high anxiety disorder for 15 years or so. I get really down and when it gets bad I dont feel like I can move and I worry about everything and everyone. I wash my hands to much. Only eat certain things that are safe, avoid alot of places because people are unpredictable and I question my loved ones because I love them so much i must be sure their safe lol im lucky they love me.
I got all the usual down sides of panic. The high heart rate feeling like your gonna pass out feeling like your being strangled and something I like to call stress ache. Sharp stabby pains in my chest and stomach that are apparently not real.
For the 8 months ive become the live in carer for my ill mum. I dont resent this I love my mum but as a consequence ive been struggling with taking my pills and being functional. So ive made a choice to stop taking the pills and focus on look after mum. So far so good. Except im waiting on a re referral for cbt to talk all this over and my anxiety is creeping up by the day.
Yesterday I was damn sure id have to get my ill mum to call an ambulance because I was deffinatly having a heart attack with a heart rate of 160. After some breathing exercises and some mindfullness I didnt have a heart attack and die but this is a stage I didnt want to get to again.
So I brought myself here as I know the best thing I can do is get some perspective . I Read some things. Its odd but nice to see so many people who understand the sheer exhaustion of battling your own mind.
Itd be really nice to chat sometime. Thanks for reading if you managed to make it threw all this :)
I got all the usual down sides of panic. The high heart rate feeling like your gonna pass out feeling like your being strangled and something I like to call stress ache. Sharp stabby pains in my chest and stomach that are apparently not real.
For the 8 months ive become the live in carer for my ill mum. I dont resent this I love my mum but as a consequence ive been struggling with taking my pills and being functional. So ive made a choice to stop taking the pills and focus on look after mum. So far so good. Except im waiting on a re referral for cbt to talk all this over and my anxiety is creeping up by the day.
Yesterday I was damn sure id have to get my ill mum to call an ambulance because I was deffinatly having a heart attack with a heart rate of 160. After some breathing exercises and some mindfullness I didnt have a heart attack and die but this is a stage I didnt want to get to again.
So I brought myself here as I know the best thing I can do is get some perspective . I Read some things. Its odd but nice to see so many people who understand the sheer exhaustion of battling your own mind.
Itd be really nice to chat sometime. Thanks for reading if you managed to make it threw all this :)