I just want to cry

[ItWillPass]

I have been trying so hard to fight this anxiety... and I have been doing pretty well... I THOUGHT. I ahve no idea what happened today...but it just has not been going very well. I am so frusterated I dont even know what to say... except I want to cry. I was very mean to my husband, and I yelled at my kiddies. I just lost my temper and said mean things. I never was a mean person. I dont get what is happening to me. Sometimes I get so upset I feel like there is a switch in my head, and once its on, I cant turn it off. Then after our argument I felt panic creeping up on me, and he is usually my suport and voice of reason, but of course my pride got in the way, and I refused to even talk to him. Is this normal???? can anyone relate??? I was NEVER like this! How can a fun happy person turn into this? Just had to vent. Things are okay now... husband of course is standing by me like a rock... but i just feel so guilty about how I treat him sometimes. can anyone relate?

[minny]

Hi Heidi!

I think a lot of people can relate to how youre feeling. I often get snappy and irratable for what I feel is no reason at all. Its only later when Ive calmed down that I can sometimes pinpoint what triggered my mood off! Other times like yourself, there doesnt seem to be any trigger at all. My kids and husband sometimes bear the brunt of my moods but Ive found information to help them understand why my moods often change. There is some wonderful literature around including this site that will help your family understand. There are even leaflets aimed at helping young children. One thing I found helped enormously was making an appointment with my GP for my family. They sat down and talked to him for nearly an hour about my condition and every individual question was answered for them.

Please dont be hard on yourself. We dont choose to feel the way we often do. This group can help you! :)

Good luck...Minny..xx

[KW]

Hi Heidi

I think we do all get like that sometimes. I find i take it out on people close to me simply because i'm angry at the world, angry with myself..and a lot of it comes down to frustration. It's great you've got this site to talk about your feelings



KW

[seh1980]

hello Heidi,

I think we all have some bad days - I know I do and I always take things out on my boyfriend. Bad days are very normal for people with anxiety. No matter how many good days we have, a bad one always comes along. Don't let it get you down!!

Sarah :D

[stimpy]

Hi Heidi

I know just what you mean.

Panic and anxiety has given us all personality transplants at some point.
It has the ability to turn the average smilie person in to a jibbering shaking nervous wreck.

We don't mean to be so mean it is just that flustration gets the better of us all at some point or another.
I think it is just the way panic and anxiety make us feel.
We don't want to be this way, but we can't help it and so we become flustrated.
We fight, it gets us nowhere and so the first people who come up against us get both barrels. It is perfectly normal.

I find my inflatable punch bag useful for venting some flustration.
Or a pillow works just as well.

It's not your fault, it is just Mr Panic working his magic again. [}:)]

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'

[sal]

Hi Heidi

I appreciate just how you feel and how hard it is, but everyone needs to let their anger out and it is unfortunate but a fact of life that we always seem to hurt those closest to us in these situations.

I am sure your husband understands.



Love Sal xxxxx

[Sue]

Yep, totally relate.

I think it boils down to frustration and annoyance of being in this b***y awful predicament.

are you ok now?

Sue

[ItWillPass]

Hey everyone... thank you so much for your replies... It is so good to know that there are people out there who understand me. I wish you all could understand, without having to go through it also... Its miserble. Anyway... today I am okay. I almost feel like I am recovering from my bad day. I feel a little shaky... and alittle iritiable... but im okay... I just want this all to pass. will it ever?

[minny]

Hi Heidi!

With the right support anything is possible! Be strong and turn to those who understand and can help you!

Good luck!

Minny...xx

[sal]

Hi Heidi

Pleased you are feeling slightly better today. It will pass but it takes time to get yourself back to how you were. But i am sure with support and your own inner strength you will get there.

Take care and we are all here to support you.



Love Sal xxxxx

[nomorepanic]

Hi Heidi

It is quite a normal feeling and sometimes we lash out at people that we don't mean to hurt atall.

Here are 2 quotes from my story on the website ...


Irritable/Moody - oh yes and with a vengeance at times!! I must have been impossible to live with!! I sometimes got very childish as well and would throw tantrums and objects!!

Hurtful/hateful - I could be very hurtful towards others. I drove people away as I was so spiteful and aggressive - hitting out at the ones I loved just because they were there.

We all do it and then we regret it.

I am sure your family understand how hard it is. Sit down at talk it over with them and explain why you did it and how you felt.

Good luck and hope you feel better now.

Try reading this post too ...

i shouldnt be like this (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1706)


Nicola

[sal]

Hi Heidi

Hope as the day has gone by you are feeling better and not feeling guilty for losing your temper.

It is a normal thing to happen when it all gets too much for us so dont just put it down to anxiety. Everyone needs to let it out and you are right in doing that rather than bottling it all up.



Love Sal xxxxx

[Merlinssister]

Hey Heidi,

Hope you're feeling a bit better now.

MS

[stimpy]

It gets to us all, but it will get better.

I hope you are feeling better today.

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[:p]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'

[jill]

Hi Heidi.

How are you feeling today?
Things will get better it just takes time.
Its easy to fight with others. but the hardest thing is fighting with yourself. Please dont think that this is going to be forever because its not. With time and support it WILL get easyer.

Take care

Love Jillxxx

May your troubles be less
and your blessing be more
and nothing but happiness
come through your door...

[Meg]

Hi Heidi,

We have all behaved in ways we regret due to anxiety and panic. Sometimes it is represented by anger , othertimes we can start to manipulate people into providing our needs, some people get clingy , others want space.

Remember that fear is an emotion and anxiety is a close relation to fear so it's no wonder that our full emotional range goes off our usual scale.


Do remember to make an effort to really thank those we think we lash out at for their support and love once the blip is over.
Not only will you feel better, but it really demonstrates to the other person that you recognise that this is not you at your best and acknowledges their help and tolerance.

What often causes huge rifts with panic is when people feel that they are being taken advantage of and that introspection and possibly selfishness is setting in and the loved one is giving huge amounts of time and effort - often without a clear idea or understanding of how this will all get resolved.

Glad you're feeling better today


Meg

It is impossible to get out of a problem by using the same kind of thinking that it took to get into it.
- Albert Einstein.