ade
09-03-07, 14:33
the weight of grief that i have been experiencing has finally broken me into pieces.yet another journey home from work sobbing with an urgent sense of heartbreak.i know my innocence was wiped out by rape but i never realised how much my beloved family would trigger this canyon sized feeling of lonely
loss.i got home and fell through the front door and collapsed on the floor begging for safety and peace.my wife was her usual beautiful compassionate self,but it was the actions of my 6yr old girl that astonished me."daddy,you are the bestist daddy in the whole world" she wrapped her arms around me and held me close."you are a gift from god" she said.i was sent to bed and told to rest and i drifted into exhausted sleep listening to my wife bathing the two little cherubs.next morning at school i was told by a support worker that megan was the single most caring girl in the school and she often gave up her playtime to help special needs kids with their work,so i went onto ebay and bought her dolly bunk beds which she has wanted since christmas.
my god i love my family.
the grief is incredible yet a part of me feels cleansed by all the tears,as if they are a human protest at the inhuman treatment we sufferred as children,a line of contact to an absolute view on innocence that i am glad to feel.mine was wiped out.period.but theirs is sacred to me and it will be honoured within a happy family unit.i have survived thus far and no murderous paedophiles are going to finish their filthy work through my suicide.no ******* way .they got me,by the love of god they will not get my children.period.
loss.i got home and fell through the front door and collapsed on the floor begging for safety and peace.my wife was her usual beautiful compassionate self,but it was the actions of my 6yr old girl that astonished me."daddy,you are the bestist daddy in the whole world" she wrapped her arms around me and held me close."you are a gift from god" she said.i was sent to bed and told to rest and i drifted into exhausted sleep listening to my wife bathing the two little cherubs.next morning at school i was told by a support worker that megan was the single most caring girl in the school and she often gave up her playtime to help special needs kids with their work,so i went onto ebay and bought her dolly bunk beds which she has wanted since christmas.
my god i love my family.
the grief is incredible yet a part of me feels cleansed by all the tears,as if they are a human protest at the inhuman treatment we sufferred as children,a line of contact to an absolute view on innocence that i am glad to feel.mine was wiped out.period.but theirs is sacred to me and it will be honoured within a happy family unit.i have survived thus far and no murderous paedophiles are going to finish their filthy work through my suicide.no ******* way .they got me,by the love of god they will not get my children.period.