Life after panic disorder

[bobpeters]

Folks here may already understand what I am about to talk about, may have dismissed what i am about to talk about for themselves and yet I am very happy to talk about... "questions"

Why did I panic? What was I so afraid of?

It turns out I am FANTASTIC at scaring myself! I don't need Stephen King or Koontz or anyone else to scare me, I scared me! I wish they would rename panic disorder to story disorder, as for me, that was where my problem was. I told me scary stories that I believed in, this resulted in panic, and then in more scary stories that I believed in because I felt scared! and more panic and the story was built upon more! Unwinding all of those scary stories took time, effort and questions.

That went on for 10 years, I'm still not sure how I survived it all but thankfully I did. Then I started to learn the value of questions. Questions change the world, and they change how we view it. So could I use questions to change myself and not be a panic sufferer? Turns out yes...



Here are just a few of the questions I asked myself over the past 6 months:

What if I didn't have to live with panic disorder, what would I do?

What's causing IT?

Who is causing IT?

What if IT does not exist and IT is just me being afraid?

What am I afraid of?

What if I wasn't afraid of those things, how would life be different?

What if I stopped telling myself scary stories?

What if I stopped believing in my scary stories?

What if I told myself a positive story every morning and every night?




I hope one day to write a book about my experience.

I'm happy to discuss. Thank you for your time!
Bob

[Beckybecks]

It's a bit like How CBT works.
We taught our brain these bad habits of reacting to certain circumstances with panic.
Now we have to unlearn those habits.

For myself, the first panic attack was triggered by something real.
But thereafter I began to fear the panic attack itself.

The fear of fear. Which simply triggered more panic attacks. And round and round it went.

Eventually I was just a huge ball of fear and found plenty of things that I could be anxious about. I developed phobias one of them being HA.

My mind is constantly searching for something else to fear.

But it's just a habit......

[bobpeters]

It's a bit like How CBT works.
We taught our brain these bad habits of reacting to certain circumstances with panic.
Now we have to unlearn those habits.

For myself, the first panic attack was triggered by something real.
But thereafter I began to fear the panic attack itself.

The fear of fear. Which simply triggered more panic attacks. And round and round it went.

Eventually I was just a huge ball of fear and found plenty of things that I could be anxious about. I developed phobias one of them being HA.

My mind is constantly searching for something else to fear.

But it's just a habit......

Hi Beckybecks,

Yes, CBT is a wonderful thing and is the basis of what helped me get through what I went through. And I needed to shift from Thoughts Feelings Actions to something that resonated change in me... so my take went from TFA to

Questions, Stories, Feelings, Actions and sometimes Stories, Questions, Feelings, Actions. This subtle shift in the process changed my perspective from something done to me to something I was doing to me. The questions are used to "break" the habits.


I am curious about your thoughts on what questions could you ask yourself around 'searching for something else to fear' so that it is no longer debilitating?

Bob

[Beckybecks]

I did a CBT course and one of the exercises was similar to what you're doing now. I think it was called Concrete Thinking or Challengng Thoughts.
I had to do an exercise where I analysed my fear, and did a full investigation into the causes and solutions. A bit like detective work :)

So I made a table with the following headings: Situation, Negative automatic thoughts, Consequences, Evidence for and against the thought, Alternative explanations, Consequences of thought challenging.

I found it really helped me to question my fear and just turn it inside out. I think all the analyzing really puts everything into perspective.

When I say my mind is constantly searching for something else to fear, I'm afraid that's when I'm on automatic pilot, just a bad habit my mind has formed which I need to keep under control.

I seem to collect information that may be of "use" to this habit, especially side effects of medication and symptoms of diseases. My mind is forever on alert to any useful little snippets. But that's because those are my major fears. It obviously depends on the individual as to what info they collect.
The questions I need to ask myself regarding this painful habit?
Why do I need to remember this information? I don't need it and when Or if I do ever need it, it's all out there waiting for me.

Thank you for making me ask myself that question.

It's a good exercise to remember.

[Petesy]

It's a bit like How CBT works.
We taught our brain these bad habits of reacting to certain circumstances with panic.
Now we have to unlearn those habits.

For myself, the first panic attack was triggered by something real.
But thereafter I began to fear the panic attack itself.

I'm the exact same

The fear of fear. Which simply triggered more panic attacks. And round and round it went.

Eventually I was just a huge ball of fear and found plenty of things that I could be anxious about. I developed phobias one of them being HA.

My mind is constantly searching for something else to fear.

But it's just a habit......

I'm the exact same becks

[chiguy]

Great post, Bob. So pleased to hear that you've beaten your illness and are enjoying FULL recovery. Bravo!

I'm currently coming to the full realization that I have a real issue with how I process fear, anxiety, etc. Your words were very encouraging to me.

I am starting CBT on Thursday and am excited to put in some good, solid work and kick anxiety's rear end for good, because the way I feel right now is no way to live life.

Take care all. Such wonderful folks out there that share the struggle.

[bobpeters]

Great post, Bob. So pleased to hear that you've beaten your illness and are enjoying FULL recovery. Bravo!

I'm currently coming to the full realization that I have a real issue with how I process fear, anxiety, etc. Your words were very encouraging to me.

I am starting CBT on Thursday and am excited to put in some good, solid work and kick anxiety's rear end for good, because the way I feel right now is no way to live life.

Take care all. Such wonderful folks out there that share the struggle.

Thank you for your comments chiguy, I am grateful for your feedback.

That's the first step to mastering our fear response, is understanding the I part.

This might not be the right time for this for you, and what i found helpful was keeping a journal to see your progress. After my sessions I kept a note on my iPhone/ipad with the following sections: Successes, Living my life (the accomplishments in fears I faced), two things I will change about me to become the person I want to be, learnings and questions for my therapist. I shared all details/contents with the therapist which helped me to maximize my time with them.

Best wishes on your road to fear mastery.
Bob