Severe anxiety over moving house

[molrol]

Hi all,

My partner and i currently rent a very cute but slightly shabby flat in Bristol, recently we decided to look for a new place to rent - as i am going back to uni - we wanted a house, to save some money and something a bit more in touch with nature. As such, i found a lovely two bedroom cottage in a village just outside the city. Its literally a 10 minute drive into town, 40 minute bike ride, its rural, cheaper than the flat and very pretty. We snapped it up and at first i was very excited imagining our new life in this home, until a few nights ago. I woke up at 2am with dread flowing through my body and the thought 'we are doing the wrong thing.' I didn't sleep again that night.

Since then, i literally cannot stop thinking about this move. I keep thinking about how much i like the flat we are currently in, we've made a lot of effort to make it look nice and everyone compliments it. We have two cats who are 100% safe from traffic and lovely neighbours we get on well with. I keep thinking about how busy the road outside the new house is - through road for commuters - and there are planes overhead quite a lot. I keep worrying about the cats getting hit by cars / attacked by other cats. I'm worrying about the effect of the planes overhead and i can't shake the feeling of doom i have. The negative 'you are making a huge mistake'

My friends keep saying if we don't like it we can move back, and yes technically we can but i would only want to live in this flat - its pet friendly, allowed to decorate etc.

I wish i could just relax, enjoy this new chapter and rationalise the fears i feel but i just can't. I feel agitated, tearful and like something is going to go very wrong.:wacko::wacko::wacko:

I wish we had never decided to move. It should feel like this.

[shiznit76]

I get like this over situations that people would normally be so excited about I get very anxious. At CBT I discussed this and the therapist told me that when we suffer with anxiety it can be hard to differentiate between excitement and anxiety as the chemicals released are the same, but when we have experience of anxiety we mistake the feelings and that can cause the spiral in to deeper anxiety.

[molrol]

hiya

Thanks for replying. I think theres a lot of truth in that, i feel excited then that excitement almost gets too much and it develops into anxiety. I am very caught up in the 'what ifs' at the moment, which is terrible.

What if we don't like it?
What if the cats get killed/hurt on the road?
What if we can't find anywhere to live back in bristol and we are stuck there?
What if the noise from the road ruins living there?

I read somewhere that people who suffer with anxiety/ocd can't handle uncertainty - probably because they don't have control. And i think thats very true too, i know for certain that i like my current flat, the neighbours and the area to give it all up and move to somewhere we know nothing about is almost too much to bear and i think that IF we didn't like it then i would be kicking myself for giving up something i loved for something i dislike.

I'm driving my partner MAD haha! But i guess people who don't have this can't possibly understand, it's less about moving house and more about the feelings that change and uncertainty evoke within us.

[shiznit76]

yes that's very true, I find uncertainty hard to cope with, but by and large, all my unfounded thoughts have turned out not to happen, but I still worry about unknowns. I'm sure it will all go well for you