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Victory2016

07-05-16, 15:47

Uhhh having a really bad day. Can't stop crying, high anxiety, heart is pounding, feeling shaky and feeling like I can't sit still. I try to do stuff, but i just want to lay in my bed. I just keep thinking I am never going to get out of this and that i am never going to get better. I am so sick of feeling like this.....I want my life back so bad

I am on day 32 of 20mg!! :weep::weep::weep::weep::weep:

Mugs

07-05-16, 16:13

Hi
Sorry you feel so bad, I know it's awful and scary.
I'm not familiar with your story at all. Do you have any kind of benzodiazepine to take while you get used to the antidepressant?

Victory2016

07-05-16, 18:12

Hi
Sorry you feel so bad, I know it's awful and scary.
I'm not familiar with your story at all. Do you have any kind of benzodiazepine to take while you get used to the antidepressant?

Thank you!!! Yes I do I take Klonopin daily up to 3X a day @ .5mg, but I mostly take 2 a day and I am trying not to take 3 a day. I was on Celexa two years ago and it worked great. The side effects are just horrible this time or maybe its just my anxiety and depression and still waiting for the Celexa to kick in.

I dont understand I guess the Celexa can overpower the effects of the Benzo.

Just feel so hopeless today. Everyday I wake up hoping it will be a good day.

Mugs

07-05-16, 18:16

How long have you been taking Klonopin?

Victory2016

07-05-16, 18:21

2 years I am wondering if I need to switch to something else like ativan or maybe I hit tolerance. I can still tell that it works. just not sure it works as well as when I first started taking it.

Suziewuzie

07-05-16, 18:28

Mugs

07-05-16, 18:28

I understand.
I became tolerant to it after using it for a couple of years, it just did not help me anymore.
I had to wean off or go higher, I chose to wean off cause taking more and more was not the answer for me.
Switching to another benzodiazepine will not likely help much.
Ativan is shorter acting and harder to wean off of.
Your doctor may have some other suggestions.
Sorry.
I spend a lot of time deep breathing and trying to distract myself.

Victory2016

07-05-16, 21:53

Around the day 30 mark on Citalopram was probably my worst time, anxiety was horrible and I wanted to quit taking it. You'll be fine, the feelings are just that - feelings, they will pass and you will get through this horrible time x

Thanks for the Hope!!! I really needed it. I been through this before and know how it works, but when your in the middle of it you seem to forget that you will eventually feel better and still need that reassurance. I scares me when I see people say they feel like a new person at week 4 and I am feeling worse. Why could I not be one of those lucky people who barely gets side effects and works fairly quickly....oh well I will keep keeping on. I keep telling myself I have been dealing with this for 3 years whats another 8 weeks to possibly feeling great.

Glad to see you a feeling good.

---------- Post added at 20:53 ---------- Previous post was at 20:48 ----------

I understand.
I became tolerant to it after using it for a couple of years, it just did not help me anymore.
I had to wean off or go higher, I chose to wean off cause taking more and more was not the answer for me.
Switching to another benzodiazepine will not likely help much.
Ativan is shorter acting and harder to wean off of.
Your doctor may have some other suggestions.
Sorry.
I spend a lot of time deep breathing and trying to distract myself.

Yea I know I was on Ativan prior hence the reason I went on Klonopin. How much were you on? how did you wean off? Did you have bad withdrawal? I went to my doctor the first week in January to try to start weaning off, but then my mother passed away a week later. Needless to say my anxiety and depression spiraled out of control and that's why I have gone back on the Celexa and halted trying to wean off the klonopin at this point in time.

Mugs

07-05-16, 21:55

Hi
You are fortunate to have found a drug that had worked for you in the past.
Many of us never do:weep:

Victory2016

07-05-16, 22:00

Hi
You are fortunate to have found a drug that had worked for you in the past.
Many of us never do:weep:

I am guessing you haven't found a drug yet? What are you dealing with anxiety, depression or both? Have you tried a lot of the SSRI etc...

Mugs

07-05-16, 22:36

Hi
Yes I have tried many different classes of drugs, so frustrating to feel so anxious all the time.
Klonopin, clonazapam as it is called here, is the only drug that ever helped me.
The most I was on for any length of time was .5 mgs twice per day, when that pooped out my anxiety came back with a vengeance.
I weaned off over a couple of months, .125 mgs per week. I was on and off this drug several times so I know a lot about tapering if you need any help I would be glad to help you.
I was on mirtazapine at the time of my taper, I think it helped with the withdrawal.
I never felt any different coming off really because it no longer worked.
Had to come off mirtazapine because it raised my cholesterol, but it never really helped my anxiety much anyway.
I just weaned off mirtazapine about 12 days ago.
I originally started with anxiety a few years ago, now I have depression. I think that's because I have been sick for so long with little to no relief.
I'm worn out, my family are supportive but have moved on, no longer know how to help me and I understand that completely.
I am a nurse and long to return to work but my dream is fading.
This site had helped me lately, trying to help others and playing the games is good.
I hope you find relief soon.
It is a lovely day here today, in the past I would have been on the golf course.
Mugs

Noivous

08-05-16, 00:09

Victory2016

08-05-16, 12:29

Hi Victory - Someone very close to me whom I can honestly say was the worst case of anxiety/depression I have ever seen. Really a complete basket case. It got to such dire straights that I finally had to take this person to a psychiatrist - a very good psychiatrist. This doctor was from India. When we got up to leave his office he got up and walked around his desk and took my friend by both hands and looked him square in the eyes. He slowly said - "you are going to get through this, everyone does."

He was right. This person - this worst case I have ever seen - is well now. I too have had my time in hell and came out the other side. You will too. Always go back to that. You are going through something right now but it will pass.

God bless,

N.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!! This is a very encouraging post. Really needed to hear this. Glad your friend and yourself have come out on the other side :bighug1:

---------- Post added at 11:29 ---------- Previous post was at 11:23 ----------

Hi
Yes I have tried many different classes of drugs, so frustrating to feel so anxious all the time.
Klonopin, clonazapam as it is called here, is the only drug that ever helped me.
The most I was on for any length of time was .5 mgs twice per day, when that pooped out my anxiety came back with a vengeance.
I weaned off over a couple of months, .125 mgs per week. I was on and off this drug several times so I know a lot about tapering if you need any help I would be glad to help you.
I was on mirtazapine at the time of my taper, I think it helped with the withdrawal.
I never felt any different coming off really because it no longer worked.
Had to come off mirtazapine because it raised my cholesterol, but it never really helped my anxiety much anyway.
I just weaned off mirtazapine about 12 days ago.
I originally started with anxiety a few years ago, now I have depression. I think that's because I have been sick for so long with little to no relief.
I'm worn out, my family are supportive but have moved on, no longer know how to help me and I understand that completely.
I am a nurse and long to return to work but my dream is fading.
This site had helped me lately, trying to help others and playing the games is good.
I hope you find relief soon.
It is a lovely day here today, in the past I would have been on the golf course.
Mugs

So sorry you have not found anything to work. Yes the feeling of being anxious all the time is like torture. I hate it. I know how you feel about family and wanting to return to work. I haven't worked in three years. I will keep my hopes up for you that you will eventually find something that will work

Yes I may take you up on your offer about weaning. My doctor was really unsure. I looked up the Ashton Manual online and was going to follow that or go to a compounding pharmacy and get it in liquid form. I am just so fearful of going through withdrawal.

Mugs

08-05-16, 17:35

Hi
I personally think the Ashton method is a little extreme. I was not prepared to take years to wean off, but who knows.

Noivous

09-05-16, 23:05

Hi
I personally think the Ashton method is a little extreme. I was not prepared to take years to wean off, but who knows.

What's the Ashton Method?

Thanks,

N.

Victory2016

09-05-16, 23:30

What's the Ashton Method?

Thanks,

N.

Its a protocol on how to taper of a Benzodiazepine. Not sure if I am allowed to post the link, but here it is http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/

Mugs

10-05-16, 02:00

The Ashton Method is based on the theory that we must come off benzidiazapines by micro tapering, taking many months to years to finally be off. They advocate a switch to Diazapam for easier weaning.
It would be a personal choice. Most doctors and pharmacists have never heard of it and prescribe a more timely taper schedule.
I did not follow the Ashton Method when I tapered.
Take care.
Mugs

Noivous

11-05-16, 23:06

Thanks Mugs! That is very interesting. I've not done benzos myself but addiction is a subject near and dear to my heart. And benzos can be a horror show if abused. So do you take any benzos now? Believe me I'm not saying they don't have their place but one has to be very cautious.

N.