Sudden turn for the worst

[PanickyPolly]

I thought I was doing really well since I met my new friends and last night I even went out with them but today I got anxious to the point of crying abouttexting a guy and haven't heard back even though he seemed really keen, made the first move ect. I'm now thinking the worst. I then found out someone in work had gone ahead and completed a project I proposed myself first but was turne down for and that upset me but mainly I'm scared I'll never see this guy again. Also his friend is ill and I'm worried he's taken a turn for the worst. I'm so isolated...even though I saw those people last night I've only seen them twice and I don't see anyone regularly and live in my own. I feel terrible. Came home and wanted to either kill myself or self harm so I got on the phone to the samaritans. Am still here but don't particularly want to be.

[kazzie]

Awwww hang in ther polly:hugs:

feel free to pm me if u wanna chat xx

Luv kaz x x x

[PanickyPolly]

Thanks for the reply kazzie I've pm'd you. I feel horrible this morning. Almost worse than last night. Couldn't sleep as thoughts of yesterday were just going around and around in my head. Feel so lonely. People in relationships don't know how lucky they are. Just don't want to be here at all. My life has been almost was's' all my life and I'm sick of it. The completed project that the other person did in work was crap...I would have done a much better job and it was my idea.