so low

[rosebud]

Hi

Feeling so down today, everything seems hopeless.
Have been doing really well and today out of nowhere feel so depressed and low. Thought i had turned a corner. I know it's probably just a bad day and tomorrow i might feel better but its knocked me for six. Don't want to feel this way ever!!! Why ?

Traceyxxx

[nomorepanic]

Rosebud

Sometimes we just have days like this for no reason.

I try to write them off and get up the next day with a positive attitude and say to myself that it was just one of those days and now it has gone.

Hope tomorrow is better for you.

[rosebud]

Hi

Thanks for your replies Nic and Lolly made me feel better.
I will try and see it as just a blip and not dwell on it.
But your right Lolly it hits you like a ton of bricks when you have been doing so well.
Thanks again.
Traceyxxx

[Keitharcher]

Hi Rosebud

Sorry to hear you think you are having a bad day, just try to think of the all the good things, its been a lovely day, so thats not so bad is it. The air is crisp so thats not such a bad thing is it. he blossom is starting to appear on the trees thats a great thing. The spring flowers are sghowing thats another great thing. maybe today is not such a bad day your just a little out of sorts a bit liverish or maybe just taking stock. Well once the batteries have recharged you will be fine tomorrow and maybe looking back you can say today might not have been such a bad day after all

Keith

[rosebud]

Hi Keith
Thanks for that. Today has been better. Wouldn't say i'me full of the joys of Spring but better than yesterday. The weather is gorgeous today so that has helped to lift my mood.

Traceyxx

[Piglet]

Good to hear you feel slightly better today Rosebud :)

Love Piglet :flowers:

[Keitharcher]

Rosebud

Today was better tomorrow will better still, if you let each day will get better until there are no bad days just some days more ace than others - it works for me

Keith

[kazzie]

Hi Rosebud

I had a crappy day a couple of weeks ago and thought the same as you but it was just a blip and im sure yours is too

Have a:hugs:

Luv Kaz x x x

[rosebud]

Thanks again for all your replies.
Starting to loose that constant fear feeling so thats a start. Scared to say that really in case i jinx myself !!!
Just hate the horrible black cloud that descends somedays out of nowhere, but it always passes thank god.
Thanks for the hug Kazzie.
Traceyxxx

[happyone]

Hi, just caught this thread just now.
Sorry you had a bad day. It is so right that we just have them and then they go. I know that at the time it feels like it is never going to lift and that somehow you will be stuck with that bad feeling forever, but it does inevitably go.


Starting to loose that constant fear feeling so thats a start. Scared to say that really in case i jinx myself !!!
You won't jinx yourself! trust me! I have spent so much time worrying about feeling 'good' in case I am on my way to feeling bad again, that I didn't enjoy the good!
Take care. Hope the next few days just keep on getting better and better!
happyone
x

[Piglet]

I think we all say that don't we about jinxing ourselves, or start touching wood when we have a good long spell, to make it last.

I guess we have to realise even before anxiety etc we would have had bad days too, it's just in those days we didn't view them as steps backwards. We just sorta felt crap then moved on and didn't dwell on it any further.

So Piglets lesson for today is that we have got to let the bad day's just go, as once they're done then they are in the past. Also to accept we are human and having a bad day is part and parcel of life for EVERYBODY!!

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

Piglet passes Rosebud and Happy a pringle each while they all sit back in a companiable silence and think how nice it would be if NMP was a commune that they could all live in! :D

Piglet :flowers:

[happyone]

I am so moved.....
Piglet gave me a pringle! I feel so happy and proud!

Now that is a friend.:cloud9:

happyone
xx

[rosebud]

Piglet gave me a Pringle:dribble: Oh my God hope i don't get hooked !!!

Thanks Piglet and Happyone:)

Traceyxxx

[Piglet]

I don't know what I am thinking just gaily giving 2 pringles away like that - anyone would think its a lovely spring day and I have squirrels playing on the patio or something! :D :D :D

However ....... Piglet puts the lid back on the tube very firmly and gives both girls a hard stare lest they think they may be getting another :mad: .... we may be friends but lets not get carried away!!:lac:

Piglet :flowers:

[rosebud]

Rosebud legs it down the Supermarket in search of Pringles:dribble: :dribble: :dribble: xxx

[Piglet]

Shall I be your dealer Rosebud??

Piglet :flowers:

[rosebud]

oh yes please Piglet. I'me developing quite a liking for them:ohmy: xxx

[W.I.F.T.S.]

Hi Rosebud,

I know exactly how you feel. Personally, I feel like I've confused anxiety with depression for a long time though. I DO suffer from depression, but I think that not wanting to do things, lack of energy and the knot in the pit of my stomach are to do with anxiety rather than depression....depression is more of a by-product of getting up every morning and not feeling excited about doing things and facing new challenges. Depression comes when your brain becomes fatigued of seeing the same, familiar surroundings and living the same routine WAITING for something to happen.

Something that I'm struggling to come to terms with at the moment is how it's 'normal' to travel long distances. Even before I had my breakdown, long distance travel scared the sh*t out of me. Imagining being on the other side of the world and having a panic attack and wanting to go home? How could I possibly fly thousands of miles anyway? And over oceans and mountains?!! But, my cousin has just visited to say that she's going to San Francisco, Hawaii and Las Vegas on holiday, my brother and his wife are going to the Dominican Republic on honeymoon, my dad has been to America and Thailand more than once, my gran is going to germany in the summer and even my mum, who suffered from agarophobia for 4 years, is talking of going to Canada!!! The kids at the school where I work are going on a skiing trip!! Why aren't they petrified like me?!

I know that I think of things differently to most 'normal' people, that I overwhelm myself with worry thoughts. I didn't ask to be like this though. Why do these thoughts trouble me, whilst other people are perfectly relaxed and even enjoy the experiences? I guess it's in whether you decide to go forward or back in these situations. If you're the sort of person who is always up for doing stuff, always volunteering yourself and if you have a 'can do' attitude, then you're much more likely to be happy and balanced compared to someone who hangs at the back, creates obstacles and prays to not be noticed. I do sincerely try to be a 'forward' person. I suppose either way, whether you go backwards or forwards, you're going to get an adrenaline rush, so it's better to go headlong into the experience and enjoy it (like a rollercoaster), rather than to resist it and go into meltdown anyway!!

Sorry, to turn your topic around to me rosebud...typical depressive self-absorption! I thought it best to add to your post with my own feelings rather than to create a new post. I've come through depression twice before myself and my mum is much stronger for her 4 years of agoraphobia (she flies abroad every year now!). Both anxiety and depression are tricks of the mind. We need determination and courage to see things for how they really are, but nobody suffers forever. The body and mind naturally work to heal itself. I read something really good the other day....trying to remember how it was put, because it loses a lot of power if I paraphrase it. I can't remember, I'm afraid. But, the gist was that depression is our subconscious's way of getting us to act to make ourselves happier, when our conscious mind lets us drift unsatisfactorily.

All the best,

WIFTS xx

[rosebud]

Hi Simon

I feel pretty much the way you do about things. I haven't had a very good week after having a pretty good 10 days or so where i thought things were starting to turn around. But the fear has snuck up on me again, thinking i'me about to drop dead at any moment!!! But no matter how bad things get there is a little part of me that thinks there will be something good at the end of all this. Without hope where would we be? So i plod on regardless and look forward or try to to having the old Tracey back and not being afraid anymore.
I live in hope:)

Traceyxxx