Can't cope with change at all, don't know how to get over it

[sazza1510]

Always since a child I have had a bit of an issue with change when I am settled into a routine if it involves an emotional situation. I now have a 3 yr old daughter and if it involves her I just feel helpless if it is disrupting her at all.

At the moment this week I have really had 2 things which have brought this on. Firstly, my daughter is at nursery school but is due to leave in September to go to preschool (all attached to the same school) but the thought of it makes me feel sick as I know her routine changes and she is having to leave somewhere I feel safe with her in and know she enjoys and knows the staff etc. I have had sleepless nights over her having to leave and move on. I know I need to snap out of this because every year from now she will leave 1 class and go to another right through till she finishes School!

Secondly, she isn't the most confident child and has her group of friends at Nursery who she looks for and talks about all the time so when she chats away about them I feel relaxed and happy because I know she is happy. Found out today as nursery is so busy with children now they are moving the eldest children to preschool already...my daughter isn't one as she is a younger one but all her friends are the older ones. When I found this out I felt physically sick and upset almost crying at how to settle her when she realises her friends are gone till September. There is only 1 friend left for her to play with and it panics me she will be so disrupted and sad wondering where they have gone.

So in my mind I am thinking its not long till September till she can get involved again with them but then the horrible feeling of her leaving nursery sets in altogether, I just feel like I just can't win.

Can't stop getting so upset, not sleeping and feeling sick from it. Don't know what to do with regards to coping with change.

[fretty freda]

I think your more worried than she will be children adapt very quickly , not like us adults , I reckon she will be just fine x

[Noivous]

...change will come whether we like it or not. Change is inevitable. I know it's a lot easier for me to say than for you to do but you just have to face it. Like aany other fear. It is conquered when it is faced. Think of change as a bully. There is only one way to handle a bully. You have to stand up to the bully. Try to embrace the change and look at it as an opportunity. Because there probably is opportunity in it.

N.

[Fishmanpa]

While I understand where you're coming from, you're already dealing with major changes on a daily basis. How do you cope with a sleeping state to being awake? From morning to afternoon to evening? The meals you eat? etc. etc. etc.

These are all changes. Again I get that when emotional factors are involved it escalates but draw on what you already know are routine changes and you'll see in the big picture that what you're thinking is minor. Your child will adapt much better than you imagine and I urge you to treat your anxiety about it as our little ones pick up on what we're feeling a lot more readily than you realize.

Positive thoughts