such a mess

[DonnaT]

I have dealt with ha for ten years now and when I have a bad turn It always just seems to get worse and worse. I thought the last health fear I had was bad and that maybe if I got through that one that the next one wouldn't be so bad ir that I could deal with it easier and move I quicker. How wrong was i ????????:blush: They get worse and worse with each episode.
I'm in such a mess I'm laying in bed in a huge panic about everything. I've even started to get palpations which means I know I'm really stressed. I have weird visual things going on, back ache, tingling. All of these symptoms are related to the problem I think I have.
I have wonderful children and I'm to frightened to get up out of bed because I don't want to have another day of worry and trying really hard nit to have symptoms (if that makes sense) nobody around me understands even my mother who is herself on medication for anxiety.
even tho I've had this a long time I have trouble getting my head around the fact anxiety can do this to you and that frightens me.
I have a opticians appointment on Monday and I'm so so frightened they will find something bad. I don't have anybody to talk to nobody wants to listen because they have all had enough of me which I understand but I just need a shoulder, a hug and patience. I'm on medication again and starting cbt soon and trying other things to help but I just want to be happy and enjoy my life and especially my beautiful children. I'm afraid to be on my own without another adult in the house, I'm afraid to drive even tho I'm just about to drive to london:roflmao: I'm afraid to leave the house afraid to stay in the house. Afraid to get up, afraid to keep laying down. I just wish I was normal. The only thing that makes me smile is my newborn baby and my children.
I'm sorry to put this on you all when your all going through your own problems but I have nobody.

[Pigeon]

Hi Donna

Here's a big hug from me to see you through :bighug1:

You sound as though you're in a bad place at the moment. Have you considered that you might be feeling worse than usual due to post natal hormones? Seriously this can affect you in a big way. I know this from experience. I had PND for a couple of months after my first child was born and it was horrible. It made it impossible to think rationally

It's good that you are on medication and starting CBT but this will take time to have an effect. Do you have anyone else you can confide in - a friend, someone else in the family? Is there anyone who can help with the children to give you a break?

In terms of the physical effects you mentioned, please try to believe that anxiety can cause all these things and more. You only have to look at the posts on here to see that.

You're doing the right thing getting help and you WILL feel better, I promise. Just keep strong , put one foot in front of the other and you'll get through it. Xxx