Fear of HPV

[Beckmo]

Hi

I'm new here, I've suffered with anxiety for a few years now, specifically HA for the past two.

I'm 22 years old and I've been together with my boyfriend who's 25 next week for 14 months. He's the only person I've slept with, however he himself has been with 14 people before me. We've always used protection, however we have had skin to skin contact, so I can only assume the same with his previous partners.

Stupidly I never went for the HPV jab while I was at school, and my anxiety probably started when I found out how many people he had been with before me. I've tried to redeem myself by getting the HPV jab privately since (still have one more jab), however I'm aware that if I already have a strain, it won't protect me from it.

I have this immense fear of HPV and Cervical Cancer. I've already accepted the fact that I probably have a high risk strain. However I'm aware that my immune system can get rid of it by the time I have a smear. But it's the not knowing whether it will by then or if it will get worse. I feel that it would probably come up if I went for a smear now.

Certain things trigger this anxiety, news articles, or if I'm aware I haven't been anxious lately, however this time it's been triggered by a girl who I went to school with recently passing away from Cervical Cancer. She was only 26, and had gotten married 5 months prior. It just really hit close to home.

[Nicholebear]

All you can do as a woman is get your annual pelvic exams and pap smears every 3 years It's good you are having the vaccine done. If you're worried about the number of partners your boyfriend has had, maybe ask him about getting tested as well. Since deep down you're always going to worry about it.

[MissyMischief]

Hi Beckmo,

I'm not sure how much comfort I can give you, but I had to add my two cents.

There are many strains of HPV and pretty much everyone picks up the strains. But your immune system fights them off and nothing ever comes of it. Pretty much every sexually active person on the planet has had some strain of HPV at one point or another.

I was diagnosed with cervical dysplasia (pre cervical cancer) four years ago. It was a scary time in my life, but it was caught early, so they basically cut the bad cells out. Long story short, I'm fine now. I get my regular paps and all that, but cervical cancer is a very preventable cancer.

My advice is just to bite the bullet and go in for your regular pap. My guess is that it will come back completely normal for you.

I know it's hard when you're totally anxious to squash all your fears, but if you take the right preventative steps like getting your regular check-ups, and keeping your immune system strong, you will be just fine.

Take care!

P.S. Just wanted to add: There's no test for HPV in men (or at least the one that leads to cervical cancer). Also, I know the tests are only recommended every three years now, but if this is a big worry for you, try and get one every year...that's the way it used to be anyhow. Once a year is definitely enough to catch anything early enough.

[Beckmo]

Thank you both for replying.

I'm just doing what I can to prevent anything bad happening. My boyfriend got tested when he finished uni (which was when he was with the majority of his partners) and he was all clean. We've been sexually active for 10 months, and neither of us have had any symptoms so I'm not concerned about that as much. I know he can't get tested for HPV which does fuel the anxiety a bit.

Unfortunately I'm eligible for a smear until I'm 25, but in the meantime, I'm trying to eat a bit healthier, and take multi vitamins. I very rarely drink because I'm on citalopram and I've never smoked.

I understand the reasoning behind the age change here in the UK, as I could have cell changes right now, and by the time I'm 25 they could be gone. It's very difficult weighing up that risk though.

[Fishmanpa]

I don't know how comforting this will be but it is the reality.

With pretty much the entire sexually active world population exposed to the virus, there's no way with the exception of celibacy to avoid it. Even the use of condoms does not rule out exposure as one can contract it from oral sex.

The vast majority of people who are exposed have no issue as the body eradicates the virus. There are only a couple of strains that can potentially cause an issue and for women, it's an easy test to determine if the virus is there. For men, while we can be screened for STIs there is no test to determine if HPV is there. That being said, men can get the vaccine as well and it will prevent infection is they don't already have it. If you've had the vaccine, that has been proven to protect you from the virus.

The bottom line is to practice safe sex and get regular gyno exams.

Positive thoughts

[MissyMischief]

I suggest if you're really worried and can't let the fear go, get tested privately. It may be expensive, but worth it for the peace of mind.

Also, there are unmistakable signs that the HPV has advanced. For me personally I was having heavy bleeding after sex. Every time with no let-up. It was pretty damn obvious to me that something was wrong. And even though the HPV was pretty advanced at that stage, I was still able to take care of it. It never turned into cancer.

Sounds to me like you're doing everything right. I know it's hard when your anxious to let shit go, but I hope that you can find some peace of mind.

[Beckmo]

Thanks Fishmanpa

I'm trying to be as realistic as I can with myself, I know it's impossible to avoid the virus.
However I didn't go for the HPV jab until after we started having sex. I've kicked myself for it and had thoughts that it would come back to spite me in the future.

I'd just like to add, that I don't have any physical symptoms at all, my periods are regular as I'm on the pill, the only back ache I get is from drumming.

---------- Post added at 18:27 ---------- Previous post was at 18:18 ----------

Just talking on here has helped me a bit Genoire.

It's something I've briefly considered, and I think if I ever have physical symptoms before I'm 25, I'll probably go private.

It's a topic that just keeps coming up every so often which triggers the anxiety. The last time it triggered was when the girl I went to school with died last month.

It's strange, I never used to care what happened to me before I met my boyfriend, now I can't imagine leaving him. I appreciate life a hell of a lot more now, which is probably the where the anxiety comes from in the sense of fearing health issues would ruin it.

[Beckmo]

Hi all,

Just posting an update as currently this anxiety is plaguing me again. This usually gets to me every couple of months. But this is the first time it's gotten to me in about 4 months or so, and I'm disappointed in myself because I was doing so well.

The anxiety is always the same, it's a fear of cervical cancer or any abnormalities. I just have this massive anxiety over it all, even though I have no symptoms whatsoever.

Realistically I know I don't need a smear until I'm 25, which is 18 months away as by then it would only be 3 years since I became sexually active, but the anxiety is there because I'm expecting a bad smear then. Or worse, it coming back normal and me not being able to trust the results.

I think it stems from me being so happy in my relationship, and I'm waiting for something to ruin it. Which I know sounds ridiculous but I can't get past it.

I'm on a waiting list for CBT, and have been for 5 months, so not sure how much longer I have to wait. I still take medication, and have great support from my boyfriend. I've never had anybody so understanding in my life like him.

[LF87]

I've had two abnormal smears with mild changes and HPV. So have several of my friends and we're all in long term Relationships. It's actually really really common. We all sadly missed the vaccine when it came out as we're old (29). It's not so bad, honestly. They do these tests to keep an eye on everything, so even if your fear happens it's really not a big deal. The tests keep on top if everything to stop cervical problems developing. I have to have another smear in a years time, and if the changes have moved from mild to moderate changes, they will remove the cells. My two friends had the worst severe changes, had them removed, and are now HPV and abnormality free.
Don't let this worry you, it's all very manageable if needs be! X