Speaking to people at work about emotional problems

[Hannahlou84]

Sorry I haven't posted for a while.. I have kind of being existing in a state of denial, and was actually coping really well. The things is, I am not now. I have a lot of panic attacks, and am worked up all the time- mainly about work it seems- and when I am there i can't concentrate. My job isn't exceptionally stressful, so I feel silly saying anything- but I am getting a lot wrong at the moment, and I don't want people to think I am just being lazy or useless.

I realise the best thing to do is probably to speak to my line manager- unfortunately she isn't the easier of people to approach, and she certainly isn't sympathetic (she would be the first person to say so!), but I am also kind of attached from her- so I *need* a positive response..

I don't know how much to say- or what to actually say- or if I am better off just muddling along. I don't really know what other details to give to you- as it is actually as straightforward as it seems... but I can't get my head around it, make a decision or decide how to do it... if at all!!

Thanks

Hannah xx

[skylight2007]

Hiya Hannah, if your panic attacks are interferring with your concentration then maybe it may be a good idea to have quiet word with your boss, I understand she may come across as unsympathetic, but she may just surprise you and respect you for actually having the courage to tell her your having some problems. The main thing is your aware your getting some things wrong, and that may have even been noticed but nothing has been said, so I feel having a chat with her will clear things up and if she has noticed any changes in you, then you will have the opportunity to explain how you've been feeling.
your not lazy, panic attacks are awful, she may not understand how they affect people, so you could explain to her and then you both dicuss where you go from there as regards how you continue to work. Hope this helps. Sky

[samc100]

Hi Hannah
My new manager is the scarey type. But cos' I wanted her to know why I have appointments and might seem to struggle I decided I needed to tell her. And also some of my team knew what was wrong with me and I wanted to be the one who told my boss - not them.

I prepared myself on what to say. I was confident ( well I tried to be!) and told her that I have been been suffering from panic attacks and it had been a harder battle than I had anticipated. I said that there may be times it would affect me at work.
She told me about the 1st time she had a panic attack. Which obviously wasn't the response I expected!

I told her how it affects me at work and we did discuss some methods on what to do when losing it at work ( e.g. I'd email her say off for walk).

I did have a month of performing dreadfully at work recently and it was really distressing. My concentration went completely. I am working hard to regain myself and status at work. I feel I have lost the confidence my colleagues had in me. But that is not the reality - they are concerned but supportive and although I may not be up to par now, I am trying and usually brilliant at my job.

I was so worried they'd think I was a nutter/ a weak link/ not a contributing part of the team if they knew what was wrong with me. But I am really glad I have told them - they may think I am loopy but they are supportive and many of them have told me about their similiar experiences.

Be brave Hannah - tell your boss. Her reaction is not your responsibility though. There is a slight risj she may not react well but that doesn't mean it won't be easier for you in the long term.

[W.I.F.T.S.]

I'd definitely come out and be open about it. I worked for a large company and now a school and they've both been really understanding about it....surprisingly so.

Not only does it help you to relax, because the weight is lifted off your shoulders and you don't feel like you have to cover it up as much when you feel a panic attack coming on, but it covers your position at work. Legally, if you've declared that you suffer from anxiety/panic disorder, then it would be incredibly difficult for them to discipline or fire you on the grounds of incompetence.

[Hannahlou84]

Hiya all

Thanks every so much for your replies- they are all very sensible and reassuring! Unfortunately, I still can't quite be brave enough to 'get on with it'. I will be okay once I actually get the chance to talk to my boss, but it's the asking that's worrying me- that and her thinking I pulled her away from urgent things 'just for that'... do you know what I mean?

Thanks though.. I am trying to work out exactly what I want to say, what she needs to know, and what I want out of it... but I don't think I really want anything other than a little understanding... but I am not sure I am going to get that!! :wacko:

Thanks again.. any ideas on how to approach this, or more of other people's experiences would be :yesyes:

[bearcrazy]

Hiya Hannah,

I had to come out and tell my boss about my GAD. I showed her a book about it and she is really sympathetic. I had to tell her cos I kept crying at work!! I also told the rest of my colleagues, and it has helped.:yesyes: