View Full Version : Thiiking of getting a new dog ?
Hi , so any one who has read my previous posts will know been through a lot this year and for the last few years , 6 weeks ago I lost my dog who I'd had for 11 years he got me through some very tough times (welling up writing this ) we gave him a good spoiled life but his last month was a nightmare having his leg taken off and then losing him two weeks later I was with him he took his last breath which broke my heart , we have another dog but she's not really my dog and she won't go out now he's gone she's lost without him as well , so you've probably guessed my dilemma do I get another dog there are so many miss treated ones needing a good home , I've not been great mentally lately so it could be a good thing or bad I know I'm going to have to train up a new dog , I also feel really guilty about replacing my once in a lifetime dog but we did save the last two from idiot owners who thought beating them was the best way to train them , I know ultimately it's my choice but I would appreciate any input , thanks In Advance.
That might be a good idea. I can't see a down side really. The distraction would do you well too.
Positive thoughts
Shazamataz
03-06-16, 22:22
I'd say go for it!
I completely understand the loss. I had to get my 13.5 year old retriever put to sleep in November last year. Only had him for 2.5 years and it still broke my heart. A year earlier I decided to plan ahead and got myself a retriever puppy, kind of a pre-replacement so to speak. I also have another dog who is coming up 5.
My only advice would be to get something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. I found, probably because of the anxiety state I was in as well as the grief, that I had some trouble for a while loving the new one after putting the old one down. I think it's because even though they are the same breed Zico, the new one, is nothing like Caesar, the old one. He had some big shoes to fill!
I'm past that now and in love with Zico too but I think getting the same breed made things harder. Just a thought.
Anyway, having a new companion may be the making of you? I'm sure you old dog would want you to be happy.
Best
S
Go for it:D your obviously a dog/pet lover like me you can't do without them:D do it and enjoy.
Yep I'm with the rest. Go for it.
Definitely go for it. Not sure where you're based but adopting a new dog from somewhere like Battersea dogs home might be an idea.
Hi . Thanks for the replies , shaz you hit it on the head with big shoes to fill my last dog was such a character , fearless , stubourn , fussy but only on his terms , I'd say he thought he was human but he probably thought he was well above that , my big fear is my anxiety and depression are so up and down at the moment I might not be up to the job , think I need to go see a dog and see how it feels , thanks
It's always amazed me the fearlessness of dogs. They can hear a rustling in the woods in the pitch dark of night and in they charge. Yeah good idea about checking to see if you're ready. That's fair to the pooch.
N.
Shazamataz
04-06-16, 01:52
Hi . Thanks for the replies , shaz you hit it on the head with big shoes to fill my last dog was such a character , fearless , stubourn , fussy but only on his terms , I'd say he thought he was human but he probably thought he was well above that , my big fear is my anxiety and depression are so up and down at the moment I might not be up to the job , think I need to go see a dog and see how it feels , thanks
It's a difficult one in the sense that having another dog is a huge responsibility when you are unwell BUT it would also give you a focus/motivation to get out and about and perhaps help with the grieving process. You will know if you are ready when you go look at some dogs and how you feel about the idea of bringing one home.
I'm struggling today as my boy was castrated yesterday (I held out as long as I could - he's nineteen months now - as I wanted him to have the testosterone to get nice and big and chunky but the humping was getting out of hand!). I didn't sleep the night before as was anxious about getting up super early to take him to the vet. Then last night he wasn't that happy and wouldn't settle so I managed only 3 hours and feel a bit back to square one. But I HAVE to take my girl Lola out (she's half collie so if she misses a walk she will drive me mental) and there have been many days these past few bad months where I wouldn't leave the house if it weren't for the dogs.
Look forward to hearing what you decide and if you find the right one :D
Here's a photo of me and Caesar (the old fella) I got a shoot done a month or so before he passed. Memories to treasure forever! (not sure if it will attach but will see what happens!)
Wow! That is a fantastic picture! And a beautiful dog. I'm sorry you lost him. But thanks for sharing the picture.
N.
Shazamataz
04-06-16, 02:09
Wow! That is a fantastic picture! And a beautiful dog. I'm sorry you lost him. But thanks for sharing the picture.
N.
Thanks. I'm a photographer myself so have loads of fairly professional images of all of my animals but, of course, they never have me in them and I really wanted someone to capture the connection we had.
He was an 'accidental' adoption as he came here temporarily after a marriage break up but when they hadn't visited in 5 months I told them he was staying with me. Had 2.5 wonderful years with him but wish it had been longer.
The new one isn't bad either, but doesn't have quite the same character as he's still a big baby!
I don't blame you for keeping him...and he looks very pleased with the arrangement also. :)
Feel free to share any of your pictures you like. I'd love to see them as I'm sure others would also. But don't feel pressured to do so.
N.
Shazamataz
04-06-16, 02:45
I don't blame you for keeping him...and he looks very pleased with the arrangement also. :)
Feel free to share any of your pictures you like. I'd love to see them as I'm sure others would also. But don't feel pressured to do so.
N.
Oh haha, don't get me started! I'll attach a couple of Zico (retriever, no balls haha) and Lola (border collie/american bulldog)
I have SO many to chose from!
Oh haha, don't get me started! I'll attach a couple of Zico (retriever, no balls haha) and Lola (border collie/american bulldog)
I have SO many to chose from!
Great pics:yesyes: beautiful dogs. Sorry to read you lost the retriever.
MyNameIsTerry
04-06-16, 05:16
Buster,
This sounds like a great idea!
Yes, anxiety could be the case but if you have looked at the new puppy threads on here everyone has said the same and we have all said it will go and they will be so happy they stuck it out. They all were! Some were talking about it being too much for them, not being able to bond because of their anxiety a couple said they were thinking of taking their dogs back but not long after that we get an update saying how happy they now are.
As someone used to dogs, you will get into that easily I think and I agree with Shaz that this might help you out because you loved your old boy so much and it hit you hard. You are not replacing him, spin it around into the fact you are doing something good for another poor dog who needs a loving, caring owner. How happy will that dog be to have someone like you looking after him/her?
It is a responsibility, and anxiety at first is possible, but you went through all that hard stuff with your last dog and you did cope. Starting with a new one will be much easier in my opinion than going through the hard decision over the treatment and then losing him.
Hopefully he/she will be good for your other dog too who depending on your old dog for safety & comfort to go out.
---------- Post added at 05:16 ---------- Previous post was at 05:11 ----------
Little trick for you, Shaz....
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/attachment.php?attachmentid=2676&d=1465004708
:yesyes: once you have uploaded a pic as an attachment to NMP, it adds it to a new webpage to be opened so you can then post the pic with the Insert Image function just like any other online image. So, I just clicked on the attachment and used the address in the browser. It can be a bit temperamental though and sometimes it needs uploading more than once and even opening from the attachments menu before it seems to properly open in a post (no idea why).
I bet Lola is very happy now Zico is a bit less "interested" too :roflmao:
Caesar, Lola & Zico are beautiful! Excellent photos.
BUT the question all us men are most interested in, but are too shy to ask is, where do we get those wellies from? :winks::biggrin:
Hi , very kind replies , loved the photos and I noticed the wellies , spoken to a few dog walkers , we'll all of the ones who noticed he was missing we all know each other's dogs names but not the owners , most have lost dogs before and some held out for months some just for weeks but they all caved in even the ones that said they couldn't go through losing another one , really need to work out how to upload photos on here , got used to sleeping downstairs on the sofa when he was ill and now can't get out of it , I need to get back into my old routine sleeping in bed , early dog walk and get some work done , had planned on some camping trips with the old boy this year just the two of us to help me stop worrying about my partners ill health but that's what happens when you make plans , just have to come up with a new plan , take care all
MyNameIsTerry
04-06-16, 07:46
You've uploaded that pic fine. All you needed to do then open the attachment from your attachments menu which brings up a new tab/window with your picture in and copy the web address and then when you post click on Insert Image and then put the web address of that attachment into the box that comes up. Doing that would have done this.
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/attachment.php?attachmentid=2677&d=1465022445
Beautiful dogs. Was yours the one in the foreground sitting down? Who's the one behind?
Hi. Cheers terry I'm not great with uploading pics the big one in front is the last photo of him after he had his leg off , the little one at the back is my partners dog she's 9 now but looks and acts like a pup , thanks
Shazamataz
04-06-16, 10:09
Buster,
This sounds like a great idea!
Yes, anxiety could be the case but if you have looked at the new puppy threads on here everyone has said the same and we have all said it will go and they will be so happy they stuck it out. They all were! Some were talking about it being too much for them, not being able to bond because of their anxiety a couple said they were thinking of taking their dogs back but not long after that we get an update saying how happy they now are.
As someone used to dogs, you will get into that easily I think and I agree with Shaz that this might help you out because you loved your old boy so much and it hit you hard. You are not replacing him, spin it around into the fact you are doing something good for another poor dog who needs a loving, caring owner. How happy will that dog be to have someone like you looking after him/her?
It is a responsibility, and anxiety at first is possible, but you went through all that hard stuff with your last dog and you did cope. Starting with a new one will be much easier in my opinion than going through the hard decision over the treatment and then losing him.
Hopefully he/she will be good for your other dog too who depending on your old dog for safety & comfort to go out.
---------- Post added at 05:16 ---------- Previous post was at 05:11 ----------
Little trick for you, Shaz....
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/attachment.php?attachmentid=2676&d=1465004708
:yesyes: once you have uploaded a pic as an attachment to NMP, it adds it to a new webpage to be opened so you can then post the pic with the Insert Image function just like any other online image. So, I just clicked on the attachment and used the address in the browser. It can be a bit temperamental though and sometimes it needs uploading more than once and even opening from the attachments menu before it seems to properly open in a post (no idea why).
I bet Lola is very happy now Zico is a bit less "interested" too :roflmao:
Caesar, Lola & Zico are beautiful! Excellent photos.
BUT the question all us men are most interested in, but are too shy to ask is, where do we get those wellies from? :winks::biggrin:
Haha I have a collection of wellies aka gumboots with all sorts of patterns. I get them here at The Warehouse very cheap but a pair only lasts 2-3 months of dog-walking. Still easier than getting wet/muddy shoes all the time.
Good to know about the attachment. So lovely seeing my boy on the screen :)
Good thing is Zico has never been allowed to be 'interested' in Lola. She is top dog and, in fact, she humps him every night after dinner!
Quite excited now to see if Buster gets another dog. I loved having three, though it was a bit expensive and thank goodness in a way that Caesar is gone now I'm not working. Spent nearly $6000 (New Zealand) on him in 2.5 years - worth every cent.
Zico is happy as a clam today so I think he will recover well from losing his 'manhood' :blush:
---------- Post added at 21:09 ---------- Previous post was at 21:07 ----------
Hi , very kind replies , loved the photos and I noticed the wellies , spoken to a few dog walkers , we'll all of the ones who noticed he was missing we all know each other's dogs names but not the owners , most have lost dogs before and some held out for months some just for weeks but they all caved in even the ones that said they couldn't go through losing another one , really need to work out how to upload photos on here , got used to sleeping downstairs on the sofa when he was ill and now can't get out of it , I need to get back into my old routine sleeping in bed , early dog walk and get some work done , had planned on some camping trips with the old boy this year just the two of us to help me stop worrying about my partners ill health but that's what happens when you make plans , just have to come up with a new plan , take care all
Awwww, love staffies :)
Oh haha, don't get me started! I'll attach a couple of Zico (retriever, no balls) and Lola (border collie/american bulldog)
I have SO many to chose from!
Fabulous photos! Thanks! Haha yes most photographers are happy to show off their art. And dog lovers love showing their dogs. In you we have both.
The pictures are beautiful as are the dogs. Lola is very unique looking. Poor Zico...he never knew what hit him.
And the area you're in is beautiful. I love the terrain.
Thanks again for sharing!
N.:yesyes:
---------- Post added at 10:34 ---------- Previous post was at 10:30 ----------
Good thing is Zico has never been allowed to be 'interested' in Lola. She is top dog and, in fact, she humps him every night after dinner!
Hahahaha....You've turned him into a Transvestdog!:D
What a beautiful picture:)xx
So went out to see a dog today got really panicky and upset driving down really mixed up on what I wanted not sleeping again last night didn't help , the dog was friendly and was ok with our other dog it was a bit hyper but it was only 9 months , took it out to see what it was like and there was no fur flying with them both off the lead , the only stumbling block was me just didn't get that feeling that I couldn't go home without him , really beat myself up over it coming home , I said one will come along and find us like my first dog we were only supposed to look after him from Christmas to new year but he never went home , that was off my partners brother , tonight she emailed him to see if he knew of any dogs needing a home and his daughter is pregnant and thinking of giving up her staffie when the baby comes along , could be fate again but we will have to see , I've seen a photo and it's a beauty red and white , and he's standing with my old dogs sister , watch this space , ps I know I started the thread but I'd love to see other peoples pet pics we used to have cats before dogs , take care all
Shazamataz
04-06-16, 22:38
I think you are doing well Buster. Not just rushing in is a good idea as well as following your instincts. Of course there is a lot to consider as it's so important for a new dog to fit in with the one you already have but YOU have to feel a connection and the right one will come along I'm sure!
I know just how you feel about taking on a new dog/pet, Buster, especially as you are feeling so low and full of doubts as to whether you could cope with the commitment when you are struggling to cope with living every second of every (long) day.
I'm not sure whether you should take on a new dog at the moment if this is going to make you feel even more anxious, especially if you are under pressure from your family. The time needs to be right for you and it's a huge decision as you will be giving any potential new dog the best life possible. Go with your gut instincts- any decision is so difficult for us but you need to get it right for the sake of you and the new dog.
MyNameIsTerry
05-06-16, 13:20
If they are thinking of giving up their dog because of the baby coming, perhaps they don't need a decision right now? Perhaps it can wait for few days?
Here is a pic of mine when he was 6 months old (he's now 9 years) since you want to see other's pets:
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/attachment.php?attachmentid=2368&d=1432446431
I felt loads of anxiety when I first saw him as a nervous little ball of fluff. It took a little bit of time dealing with new routines and the crying at night (I had sleep issues back then as I was at my worst) but I soon got used to it. I feel sad that I've lost so much time that I could have spent walking him with my bizarre sleep routines so I spoil him with toys a bit. We play. I'm very glad we had him though, he's very loving.
Shaz - so it's more the other way around then and she will be getting annoyed at his lack of performance? :blush:
Hi , nice cute picture of your dog I've only got one pic of mine as a pup and it's a photo of a photo , don't know where the last 11 1/2 years went I got him I was ok working and no real anxiety that came four years ago and even then I only stopped walking him for two weeks when I had a breakdown it used to absolutely kill me to leave the house but he needed walking and I needed to get out , we had a few laughs about his stubourness last night hed jump in the drivers seat of my van at petrol stations and refuse to move , he wouldn't watch you eat but he'd face the other way and drool , a day like today he's lay in the sun until he was literally a hot dog then flop into the house panting for an hour , it's the daft things I miss most , we've talked today and we aren't having the dog we saw yesterday but the other one might come along she's not due just yet so it gives me somtime to get my head together , it's been a rough day but I do feel the pressure is off to make decision just yet , I want the whole process to feel right like it did first time , I fuss that many dogs when I'm out I can imagine what these feel like on the photos they all have a different feel to them mine had short fur but I'd scrunch up his neck skin while watching tv and him taking up most of my seat so I was squashed in the corner , take care .
I'm glad you've come to this decision. You're still very much grieving for your companion-you'll know when you're ready. I hope you sleep better tonight.
MyNameIsTerry
06-06-16, 07:40
That's the joy of pets, the funny little ways. Mine is quite stubborn and he knows he's cute as he plays the sad eyes for treats a lot. He is very friendly though, a burglar would be incapacitated in a big puddle of drool rather than bitten!
Mine thinks he's human and had been taking over the chairs for years, but he gets shifted over. We bought a new dog cushion for him as the carpet is not as fluffy as before and he's forever in that now most of the time and on the chairs much less.
Staffies have a bad rep but they can be soft as anything. I remember an old bulldog running up to me at a national park once, wagging & tongue lolling, and he jumped up on my legs to great me. He was like a little beer barrel! The pups are very cute though.
Do yours all love nosing in carrier bags like mine does? He things it's either treats or toys!
That's good that you have some breathing space. Perhaps it feels a bit too soon and you need time to process it? You might get used to the idea now you know a dog you can have?
I know how you felt about going out, I was the same both times although it was the meds that did it to me. Getting out as soon as possible is essential, I think. Its hard at first but having to walk the dog is a healthy activity that will help us in the long run. It's better than getting more agoraphobic as it gets harder the longer you go with that.
Hi , so any one who has read my previous posts will know been through a lot this year and for the last few years , 6 weeks ago I lost my dog who I'd had for 11 years he got me through some very tough times (welling up writing this ) we gave him a good spoiled life but his last month was a nightmare having his leg taken off and then losing him two weeks later I was with him he took his last breath which broke my heart , we have another dog but she's not really my dog and she won't go out now he's gone she's lost without him as well , so you've probably guessed my dilemma do I get another dog there are so many miss treated ones needing a good home , I've not been great mentally lately so it could be a good thing or bad I know I'm going to have to train up a new dog , I also feel really guilty about replacing my once in a lifetime dog but we did save the last two from idiot owners who thought beating them was the best way to train them , I know ultimately it's my choice but I would appreciate any input , thanks In Advance.
Yes 100 per cent get a new dog
get a really cute, playful one too.. and i assure you a month down the line you will have so much fun with it, that you wont have time to be sad about the last dog!
Moving on is the best way. Always. :yesyes:
Well we've gone for it no gong back , new addition turned up today 19 week old staffie called bella , unwanted pup brought round in a cage that's been chucked in the garden , ok I've been realy anxous all day running round after her but hoping it will calm down tomorrow , shed a few tears for my old dog and still miss him like mad but we bailed him out of a crap life and hopfully we've done the same for this little one , hope the photo comes up if not I'm sure our friend terry will come across it and open it up I'm still working out how to set the timer on the vcr ( over 40s joke ) take care .
Shazamataz
25-06-16, 22:12
Oh she looks lovely Buster! She is a very lucky dog to have come to live with you. I hope she will help you feel better
x
Thanks shaz , she just settled down after 12 hours of going potty took her out and let her off the lead in a field and she came back so fingers crossed she will learn quick , I'm going to have to work out our time difference beçause neither of us seem to sleep , hope you are getting a break from the anxiety mine never sleeps , take care .
MyNameIsTerry
26-06-16, 05:01
Ahhh, she's lovely. Very cute!
She sounds confident so that's a good thing to have in a new pup. Hopefully she will be good for you and for your other dog. The anxiety will fade as you get into the routine with her and the bond will take over, something you know very well from your last lad.
And don't feel bad, you aren't forgetting him or replacing him. You are doing a good thing for an animal that's needs your help and deserves the good life you will give her. I think your old boy would be proud of that.
How could I resist posting up a cure pic like this???
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/attachment.php?attachmentid=2698&d=1466888009
:yesyes::yahoo:
Cool! She looks like a sweetie! While nothing can truly replace the love and companionship of a previous furry friend, building a relationship with a new pet is wonderful and the dividends are priceless. Good luck with her!
Positive thoughts
She's beautiful! Wishing you much joy and pleasure as you bond with her and well done for taking her on-she's come to a great home.
Hey Buster!
Just wondering - how's it going with the pooch?
N.
I must admit it's been a while since we had a pup and I was in a better place mentally back then to deal with it but she's coming on , she comes back 9 times out of ten off the lead she's house trained now , she's a handful but then pups are , we've just been away and our older dog was the problem kept us away every night whining and scratching the door she's better now with another dog but she's nine and the pup is 6 months she was more content with the old boy , I'll stick with her and hopfully have another great dog in a year , thanks for asking it was very good of you , take care .
MyNameIsTerry
24-07-16, 05:02
Will you be thinking of having an older dog next time then, Buster?
Your pup will calm down in time. It's really good to hear your other dog has responded well. She's obviously very in need of canine company and not an alpha.
So the new dog earned her keep last night , I slept down stairs because it was too hot , about 1 o'clock she jumped up barking like mad and ran in the back room followed by my older dog she's got a real good bark for young dog , any way woke me up and thought it was my daughter coming home after a few mins of no noise no micro wave turning on or fridge door opening I got suspicious , some low life had opened the back door which I hadn't locked they'd legged it and left the door open , I'm hoping they had just got the wrong house as its a terrace we've got a few new neighbours , anyway it's good to know she barks at the right time well worth two tins of dog food a day .
best home alarm in the world
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