How can a tablet make me feel so awful

[Andy1718]

Day 12 - Beginning to loose faith in what I have taken. Think the anxiety I lived with before is better than what I am feeling now. No sleep again last night. Woke to sweating hands, adrenaline in my arms and nausea. Absolutely no energy. I seem to feel worse in the day after taken my tablet in the morning and then feel better mid evening. Any reason for this? Sleep is still very hit and miss. I do hope that it's all worth it. My anxiety was mostly situational such as meetings, work gatherings. Was not anxious all the time but very anxious is certain situations. However it all got to much for me with work, bad back and my father passing away. Now wonder whether I should have stuck to propranolol only instead of being on this roller coaster ride! Doctors seemed to think that cit was the answer but scared that I have opened a can of worms that I can't turn back on.

[Becky2785]

Hi andy I'm on day 20 and feel really down these past few days with intrusive thoughts. I thought the same about tablets I wish I never took any and just seemed therapy instead but here we are after taking them things will get better for us we have just got to be strong soon we shall see a difference hope ur well xx

[Suziewuzie]

What you're feeling is totally normal - it gets much worse before it gets better. I went from only having panic attacks in certain situations, to being riddled with anxiety all day every day. It's horrible but it seems to be the norm, and in my experience it will stick around for another couple of weeks. If you're struggling with sleep then it's worth asking your GP for a course of sleeping tablets, I'm not a fan of taking tablets but the lack of sleep in the first few weeks was killing me so I took sleeping tablets for two or three days.
Propanolol is useful for easing the physical symptoms of anxiety and lots of people take them together so if they're helping ease the symptoms at all that's great. Pretty much everyone who posts on this forum will tell you that they feel worse in the mornings & start to feel better in the evening - not sure why that is! I take my tablets at night so I don't think it's anything to do with what time we take the citalopram.
In the early days it's impossible to think about anything other than how you're feeling, and it's hard because thinking about it and talking about it constantly only makes it worse. Soon you will get to a point where your symptoms get a little easier to ignore & once you get to that point it all starts getting better. This forum is great and I used to post on here ALL THE TIME in the beginning but once I started to feel better I actually found posting on here and giving my anxiety so much time & attention just made it worse. But right now it's early days for you & you need the supporr and somewhere to vent.
Are you doing anything to help yourself like self help books, meditation etc?

[Victory2016]

Stay strong and don't give up! You will feel better. The first 2-3 weeks are the worst. For some of us our symptoms get worse before they get better. My anxiety and depression got worse when I went on the meds. I am on day 63 and my depression and anxiety are so much better, but I still have aways to go.

[Mojo61]

Keep going Andy, you are doing fantastically well even though it probably doesn't feel that way to you.

Suzie, Victory and Becky are right, you will feel like absolute crap and even that you are losing the plot - but you aren't, it is just the fear of the medication that's making you feel that way. Try saying to yourself "Every tablet I take is helping me and moving me closer to recovery"

Would you like me to send you the link to some free Claire Weekes audiotapes? She is old fashioned but what she says makes perfect sense - we are our own worst enemy when it comes to anxiety; we "feed" the monster by responding to panic with more panic. She teaches you how to stop doing that and once you have mastered the technique it becomes a lot easier to deal with the symptoms because you understand them and how they work.

Don't give up, you are nearly there!!!

[Becky2785]

On day 20 today really shouldn't count the days but I can't help it just got over 2 bad days feel ok today I emailed the samaritons last night for a bit of support and back at the doctors on Tuesday then therapy on Wednesday. Waiting for that to arrive tho hope everyone is well

[Andy1718]

Thanks for the support guys. My biggest fear is going back into work and will I ever get back? If I don't what I am going to do, support my family? Had an ok day today but I cannot stop thinking about what is going to happen. Feel I am loosing my mind. Thanks but I have the Claire weekes audio just not done much of it. Trying to stay strong.

[Suziewuzie]

You will go back to work. I had all that too - I was never going to be able to go back to work, I'd lose my job, then I'd lose my flat, then my relationship would fail etc. This is where the CBT techniques come in handy!!
Remember you're not going to listen to one audio tape / read one book and feel better, just like you're not going to magically feel better by taking a tablet. Sadly we have to work at this ourselves & that seems impossible when we're already so beaten down, but it's not x

[pollynewsome]

Id love the claire Weeks links please:) Im at 8 weeks and loads better but yes the first 6 weeks for me were not the best.. The anxiety was worse than ever. The adrenaline in the arms is still an issue, it causes me so much pain.. I had a tens machine on it all last weekend to take some of the pain off. Keep strong. x

[Mojo61]

I will send you the link Polly x

[pollynewsome]

Ty x