Pure frustration

[Andy1718]

Ok guys. So into my 5th week on. My anxiety has settled a little and I am not in a panic state but that's about it. Every morning I wake and hope with a positive mind that today is the day that I feel like my old self. So today I wake up with anxiety in my arms and head. Thinking, thinking and more thinking. I feel ok in the day, busy and on an anxiety roller coaster. One minute I feel great then the next a rush of thoughts and anxiety, then it goes. Come on tablets let's be having you.

[Mojo61]

It is a very slow process Andy, and one you can't hurry up unfortunately. If only it were as simple as taking a tablet for a few weeks and then everything would be back to normal, but it doesn't work like that. I'm going into week 11 and still experiencing a roller coaster of emotions - some days up, some days down, sleeping, not sleeping, eating, not eating. All I can say is it is far better than the hell I was living through daily just a few months ago and I'm hoping and praying that it will eventually get better still and I will be able to lead a half decent life again.

You are doing so well when you think back to how you were in those first awful days. Try not to put a time scale on things or wishfully thinking that perhaps today will be the day that it all goes away because you are just adding more pressure on yourself and it isn't helpful. Instead try to take each day as it comes (very hard I know when you feel yucky) and let time pass by naturally. That's when you will come to realise how much better you feel and how far you've come :yesyes::yesyes::yesyes:

[Andy1718]

Such great advise once again. I guess I am just impatient. Finding it hard to judge how I am feeling. I am better than I was but of course as soon as you start thinking about if you are better anxiety sets in. It's a viscous circle but you are right I need to give it time. Only have another 2 weeks off work until I see the GP again. Really want to get back into the classroom to teach but it's not a case of testing the water. You have to be fully committed and I am not ready for that yet. Just worried that if I leave it too long I will never go back or won't be able to get back to work.

[Suziewuzie]

You will go back! From the posts of yours that I've read you're obviously desperate to get back to normal & return to work. You are hopeful, and that's important in recovery. It's true that the longer you leave it the harder it seems to return, but you need this time right now - youre going through a lot while the medication gets established in your system and it's much easier to do that away from work. You have a clear goal - to return to work, and that's what you're working toward every day and you WILL get there. And when you do go back it will help immensely and you'll feel better after a couple of weeks. The anxiety rollercoaster is the worst and it's exhausting but it will start to settle soon with fewer downs & more ups.