Will I ever be happy again?

[Mojo61]

Hi guys. I'm now going into week 11 on 10mg citalopram. The anxiety has got much easier but I am still really miserable and tend to ruminate quite a lot. I'm just not happy and can't find joy in anything, nothing excites or motivates me and it feels like I'm just going through the motions of living without all the fun and excitement that most people feel.

Will I ever be happy again, and wake up looking forward to the day instead of just wishing the hours away until the evening when I get a bit of a reprieve. I'm not even sure that increasing the dose to 20mg will help and I certainly don't want to get those side effects again.

Sorry for the whinge - just feeling really down and weepy lately even though I've been trying my hardest to keep busy, and I even volunteer 1 day a week now at Age Concern.

[MaWi69]

Hey Mojo, sorry to hear you aren't feeling happy. I have no idea what citalopram does (restraining myself from Google) But im sure your Age concern volunteering will be a great help - nothing like helping others to give a sense of achievement and positivity. :)
And have a virtual <hug> for good measure.
M

[Mojo61]

Thank you x

[pollynewsome]

I was on 10mg and it helped a little but going up to 20mg did make a massive difference! still not 100% but much much better than i was. Very few side affects increasing but i know we are all different. The doc told me that the therapeutic dose is 20mg and that you really wont notice that much of a difference at 10mg so i increased after 4 weeks at 10mg.. I have now been almost 11 week at 20mg and i am now having days where no anxiety at all.. like this weekend:) i have a bit today but for good reasons so not dwelling on that.. Talk with doc and see what they think. Im glad i increased cos i didnt want to but its made a difference. Keep strong. chin up and big hugs:)

[Mojo61]

Thanks Polly. I had a fantastic week last week, there were times when it felt like I was back to my normal self and I actually managed to forget about the anxiety on several occasions! Then on Wednesday I changed over to a different HRT patch and that's when it all started going downhill again. I don't know if it had anything to do with the new patch because this one doesn't contain progesterone and I read that withdrawal from this hormone can cause increased anxiety, weepiness, low mood and insomnia, which is exactly what is happening. Hopefully it will settle down over the next few days and I will feel better. I'm going to give it 3 full months on 10mg which means waiting until 2nd July and then I will have a review regarding increasing to 20mg.

[pollynewsome]

Good idea Mojo see the full 3 months out. it could well be the patch! hope it settles down for you real soon..

[Mojo61]

Yes I'm hoping so Polly x

[dale12345]

I am sorry you feel so bad I ha e been there it will get better.

[Victory2016]

Hi Mojo....

Yes we will! I just went through a horrible two weeks and today I feel a lot better. I just hope it stays.

I think the HRT is causing some of your issues, so hopefully that will get better. Also you may need 20mg you never know it maybe just what you need to beat this. You can always back down to the 10mg if you feel it was better for you.

I have an appointment with a new psychiatrist on July 22nd and if he wants me to move up to 30mg I will do it. I will be on Cit for 15 weeks by that point.

:hugs:

[Mojo61]

I think I'm going to have to increase to 20mg - I feel dreadful

[Becky2785]

I'm thinking the same mojo not feeling dreadful but still anxious and the thoughts are still there but scared to increase I'm only on week 6 so not sure what to do xx

[Mojo61]

I was so good up until Wednesday last week, been getting steadily worse since then. This morning I woke up feeling really sick, I thought I was going to throw up. Stomach churning and aching all over.