Help me please!!!!! [Archive]

Nicole201017

09-07-16, 19:03

Hi guys I want you to know your not alone! I'm 23 and have suffered with servere HA since I was 17! It's been a long old road and im still on that f***ing road lol! The past 2 months in perticular have been such a difficult time I went though somethings that landed me in having to have a d&c for retained products that was the worst day ever crying uncontrollably because I was being put to sleep! But that went brilliantly long story cut short I've been in and out of A&E first time was all my HA because I had an infection sorry that was be fore the d&c then back in a couple of days after d&c for extreme pain in lower stomach everything came back fine, then just for my reassurance I put in a urine sample at my own doctors Thursday they rang me back Friday saying they had dipped it and it showed some white blood cells! (Cried my eyes out thinking I'm going to die) when will this end! I've now gone on to find a mole that's was itchy today no other symptoms looks like but that sparked me on to look at one on the leg witch has jagged edges and slightly faded edges! My HA has gone completely hit the roof!! I THINK I have every cancer possible I have every infection possible I have blood clots all over my body I have all sort of heart problems the list is endless! When will I ever be free of HA my life and my children's life's are being completely affected by the I'm being fined by the educational welfare because my child is late or sometimes not in school because of my HA I'm currently staying with my mum and leaving my partner of 8 years at home on his own because of my HA!!! Although I am absolutely terrified of dying sometimes I think would it be easier to take my own life instead of some illness/disease!! (I love my babies and want the best life so them but my HA is holding me back I don't want to leave them behind) :weep:

DisgracedAngel

09-07-16, 20:46

Fishmanpa

09-07-16, 21:05

Hi Nicole

Have you spoken to your doctor about how you're feeling? I think that is a very important first step! Please get someone to talk to, because while many of us here have debilitating health anxiety, you shouldn't ever assume anyone is best off without you because of it. This can be dealt with...but in baby steps! I just joined yesterday to get the help I need myself. I also started CBT therapy. I know I can do it, and if I can, you can! Just a matter of making that first initial step. Please, please talk to someone.

Exactly! When I see a desperate cry for help in this medium, the best advice is to seek "real life" support and help. The site is great in knowing you're not alone and cathartic in that you can express your feelings and there's some great resources here as well, but it really comes down to acting on your own behalf.

Positive thoughts

Nicole201017

09-07-16, 23:13

Thank you for your reply's! I've been to the doctors a few times for my HA I am always offered anti depressants witch I won't take because I'm scared of taking tablets in case of feeling "weird" not in control! I've taken them once about 4 years ago and they made me feel so bad like I an out of space experienced witch triggered a massive panic attack! I've also gone for therapy last year had about 3 sessions but had to stop due to compilations in late pregnancy and then labour! I was told I could go back just need to be referred by my doctor! My mum keeps pushing me to go back! So I'm going to make an appointment next week defiantly! Again thank you for your reply's! I'll keep you posted ☺️

Fishmanpa

09-07-16, 23:27

I'm a cancer survivor. I know more than anyone how meds can make you feel worse before you feel better having had chemo and radiation. Some people experience unpleasant side effects on SSRIs and some don't and everything in-between. Not taking them and no therapy essentially allows your illness to remain and it's obvious from what you posted, it's not getting any better.

You're asking for help. Help yourself, listen to your doctor and your mother, look into therapy and give some serious thought into meds. Do it for yourself and for your loved ones. I had an illness that could have buried my six feet under. Your illness, left untreated is doing that to you above ground.

Good luck and as always...

Positive thoughts

DisgracedAngel

10-07-16, 11:41

I must say I know nothing about the mess because I haven't been on any. I didn't want to, but my HA is so ridiculously out of hand that I kind of hope for something. From what I've read here, what works for one may not work for another. It's best to try something different if your doctor thinks it's appropriate.

Glad you're going back to your doctor though...the first step!! :-)

Fishmanpa

10-07-16, 14:46

From what I've read here, what works for one may not work for another. It's best to try something different if your doctor thinks it's appropriate.

True. My daughter (she has anxiety and depression) went through three meds and all the fun that goes with ramping up and cross tapering until they found one that works. It was difficult but she was in therapy and managed it well. She's doing GREAT now :)

Positive thoughts

geezer46

12-07-16, 11:10

Nicole we are all on here for the same reason h/a.I have had it for over 50 years so i know how you feel and there is not a lot of help in England no groups etc,i now pay to see a psychiatrist who specializes in h/a,i drive her nuts but she tells me i am lucky and that i must think that way it is hard to do so but you are only 23 do NOT be like me get the help you need now do not let it ruin your life is my best advice best wishes to you.

Intercity

12-07-16, 11:57

Trust me the tablets will do exactly the opposite they will help you get the control back. They are not as strong as you think. I was scared too but I am now on Citalophram which are very mild and I can still do my driving job.
They will help I promise but they take time to work at least a few weeks after starting them.

Good luck 😎