View Full Version : Intense anxiety and fear from Variant Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (vCJD)
Hello everyone :emot-wave: ,
I'm new around here and this is my second post on these forums.
I will present myself quickly : 25 years old male, living in Switzerland, Geneva, where i was born in 1990. I'm sorry if my english is a bit rough, my native language is french :smile:.
I was always a pretty anxious child and teenager, with an acute phase in 2005-2008 when i was 15-18 years old.
Back then the anxiety mainly took the appearance of emetophobia (fear of vomiting, fear of losing control) and it caused me to lose a lot of weight to the point of having my vital prognostic engaged, to develop obsessive compulsive disorder like excessive hand washing, and fear of food and alimentation in general (because food = vomit material, right ?).
After being hospitalized for these problems i hopefully met a great specialist and thank to his aid and counseling i managed to slowly overcome these fears, even if it took a considerable amount of time.
But now i feel i'm back at the starting point.
Recently, the 26th may, i had an acute vertigo attack. Like the room was spinning around me. The acute vertigo went away quickly, but since then i feel dizzy all the time, like i'm swaying left and right (not brutally, it's more of a subtle feeling). I was always a pretty avid user of computers, it's also my job, and now i can hardly stay in front of a screen, it "sways" too much and my eyes gets tired very quickly.
Now, a little bit more than a month later i still have that sensation. I've seen countless specialists, even some very renowned in the "mysterious" world of vertigo and unbalance, did countless tests (even very specific and recent ones, with virtual reality goggles on my eyes and all that), cerebral MRI scan, blood tests, ophthalmic tests... and they all came back normal. Apparently i'm "structurally" healthy. There's nothing pointing towards a chronic disease or a real deficit of the inner ear or the brain. For the specialists it's mostly likely psychological with a "benign" physical cause that probably started it all.
But still, since that event my anxiety is through the roof. I had multiple panic attacks, initially caused by the thoughts of having to be dizzy, tired and depersonalized for the rest of my life. I lost a lot of weight, too.
Then the anxiety calmed itself a little bit (not the dizziness or the derealization though, they were always present since the event), until an ophthalmologist told me that he saw a little bit of "skew deviation" in my eyes. Needless to say i opened Google to look what "skew deviation" was, and i fell on a page talking about Variant Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (vCJD) as a result.
And now here i am.
I am absolutely convinced that i suffer from the early stages of the disease. Even more when i saw that the early symptoms are mostly psychological (anxiety, depression and dizziness) and most of the time wrongly labeled by specialists as a "simple" psychological problem. I'm anxious beyond anything i ever experienced. I'm expecting the worse, i'm already have mental images of my parents crying over my body in a vegetative state, i'm on the fence for every symptom that would reinforce that diagnosis.
I just don't know how to get out of this anxiety loop anymore. I just don't know how to convince myself i don't suffer from this disease. How would i know anyway ? There's no real diagnosis and it can stay dormant for years until it manifests itself. Switzerland was pretty safe from it and i never went in the UK in my whole life, but i frequently went in Italy (1995-2005) when i was a kid because my grandparents live back there so...
I can't accept that i'm going to die in a few months. To the stage when anytime i do something or say something i hear a little voice saying "profit of what you said / what you did until you still can" and causes massive anxiety.
DisgracedAngel
10-07-16, 11:52
Around the same time as you, I had the sudden onset if vertigo. I never happened before and it scared me. I ended up in hospital for them to tell me I had a sinus infection. The next few days were still awful so I went to my doctor who said I had labyrinthitis, probably as a result of the sinusitis. I has given anti dizziness tablets and VRT exercises, and told it could take 3-10 weeks to overcome! I have also found that labyrinthitis can have lasting effects beyond that if there is damage to the very inner ear. I know you said you had all of this checked but have you been to an Ear, nose and throat specialist?
Luckily mine went away in the three weeks although I still need to have a steroid nose spray because doctor said this will be a long term problem because I apparently have a crooked nose lol But I was prepared to demand to see an ent specialist if it didn't.
Around the same time as you, I had the sudden onset if vertigo. I never happened before and it scared me. I ended up in hospital for them to tell me I had a sinus infection. The next few days were still awful so I went to my doctor who said I had labyrinthitis, probably as a result of the sinusitis. I has given anti dizziness tablets and VRT exercises, and told it could take 3-10 weeks to overcome! I have also found that labyrinthitis can have lasting effects beyond that if there is damage to the very inner ear. I know you said you had all of this checked but have you been to an Ear, nose and throat specialist?
Luckily mine went away in the three weeks although I still need to have a steroid nose spray because doctor said this will be a long term problem because I apparently have a crooked nose lol But I was prepared to demand to see an ent specialist if it didn't.
Hello.
I know you said you had all of this checked but have you been to an Ear, nose and throat specialist?
Yes i did. Three times, three different persons :blush: (yeah when i want to have answers i do anything, even stupid things). They all said i was fine, and it was certainly not a vestibular neuronitis or a labyrinthitis. And i trust them because the vertigo attack wasn't extremely intense nor long (10 seconds is way too short to be labeled as a neuronitis or labyrinthitis) and i didn't had any kind of infection prior to that.
As i said i don't have vertigo (room spinning etc) since the initial event but i do feel dizzy, like nothing is really stable or straight , and i have troubles concentrating because of that. Apparently it's a problem of perception, not actual balance, since i'm able to walk, exercise, or run without issues.
Hence my fear of Creutzfeldt-Jakob (mad cow). All the symptoms i have can be linked to the early stages of Creutzfeldt-Jakob. Maybe that sensation of dizziness is an early neurological symptom ? I'm terrified. Not being sure of anything is killing me.
The worst part is that the crippling anxiety isn't always present. It's fluctuant. Like a wave if you want. And i'm convinced it's also a typical Creutzfeldt-Jakob symptom because it doesn't make any sense. In such a case my anxiety should be permanent, not fluctuant like that, it must be neurological.
---------- Post added at 14:44 ---------- Previous post was at 10:58 ----------
Already told my relatives to be ready to see me gone in a few months. They laughed at my face. I feel i start to annoy them with my problems.
When I see posts like this that are about an extremely rare disease, I know Dr. Google is involved. When I say extremely rare, it's like the brain eating amoeba, rabies and other illnesses and diseases that if indeed someone had one, it would make the headlines.
In the US, fewer than 1000 cases of vCJD a year are reported and that's out of a population of close to 320 million! That's a .000003125% chance. In other countries, the stats are close to the same.
With you being cleared by several medical professionals and scientific medical testing as well as your presence on this forum, it all points to a non physical issue. Are you getting help for your anxiety?
Positive thoughts
When I see posts like this that are about an extremely rare disease, I know Dr. Google is involved. When I say extremely rare, it's like the brain eating amoeba, rabies and other illnesses and diseases that if indeed someone had one, it would make the headlines.
In the US, fewer than 1000 cases of vCJD a year are reported and that's out of a population of close to 320 million! That's a .000003125% chance. In other countries, the stats are close to the same.
With you being cleared by several medical professionals and scientific medical testing as well as your presence on this forum, it all points to a non physical issue. Are you getting help for your anxiety?
Positive thoughts
Thanks you for your thoughts Fishmanpa,
Yes, Dr.Google is obviously involved. That's the downsides of being "connected" all the time.
I will soon start a therapy for my anxiety. It took over one month between finding someone and getting an appointment.
I'm aware that the chances of getting such a disease are infinitely small, but still, the fact that there's a chance, no matter how small it is, is already enough for me.
As for being "cleared", well there's no definite diagnostic for vCJD except post-mortem. Our fellow Dr.Google gave me enough examples of cases of vCJD (in fact i've read pretty much everything Google had to offer about it) that went undiagnosed until the severe symptoms appeared because the MRI scan and various "standard" tests were somewhat normal.
It's the fact that an early vCJD is often diagnosed as a depression / panic attack / general anxiety that chills my bones day and night. And that's part of the reason why i can't accept that i might suffer from "just" anxiety, because what would happen if i start believing that and, in the end, i was indeed suffering from vCJD ? I would be be devastated beyond imagination, literally and figuratively.
Besides how do i know if i'm anxious from having vCJD or it's having vCJD that makes me anxious ? I'm expecting the worse, who knows in which state i will be in a month.
countrygirl
10-07-16, 17:35
Is your neck aching! I always come into any post about vertigo with this question as any tension in the neck muscles from whatever cause even anxiety can cause attacks of vertigo and persistant dizziness. I know as I have had this for 30 years due to structural neck problems but it applies to anyone whose neck muscles are just tense from say sitting at a computer all day:winks:.
Your neck muscles and joints send messages to your inner ear, plus you have a sypathetic nerve ganglia running down your neck that affects balance. ( Neuro and physio information).
I know from long experience that these symptoms cause huge anxiety because so many nasty things can cause them. I was told 30 years ago that my problems were from my neck but didn't believe it and had every test and then done again over and over to rule out brain tumour etc.
So if you can try and limit your computer use or take lots of short breaks and don't stare at the screen and relax those shoulders and neck!
Is your neck aching! I always come into any post about vertigo with this question as any tension in the neck muscles from whatever cause even anxiety can cause attacks of vertigo and persistant dizziness. I know as I have had this for 30 years due to structural neck problems but it applies to anyone whose neck muscles are just tense from say sitting at a computer all day:winks:.
Your neck muscles and joints send messages to your inner ear, plus you have a sypathetic nerve ganglia running down your neck that affects balance. ( Neuro and physio information).
I know from long experience that these symptoms cause huge anxiety because so many nasty things can cause them. I was told 30 years ago that my problems were from my neck but didn't believe it and had every test and then done again over and over to rule out brain tumour etc.
So if you can try and limit your computer use or take lots of short breaks and don't stare at the screen and relax those shoulders and neck!
Hello ! Depends what you mean by aching. My neck doesn't "hurt" per say, but my upper back does when i'm sitting in a bad chair or when i walk too much. I do have some difficulties to swallow time to time (like it takes longer to "pass"), though. Which is another symptom that we find in vCDJ. Great.
Hello ! Depends what you mean by aching. My neck doesn't "hurt" per say, but my upper back does when i'm sitting in a bad chair or when i walk too much. I do have some difficulties to swallow time to time (like it takes longer to "pass"), though. Which is another symptom that we find in vCDJ. Great.
It's also a very common symptom (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/articles/symptoms) of anxiety! I'd bet my next year's salary you're not dealing with vCJD :)
Positive thoughts
It's also a very common symptom of anxiety! I'd bet my next year's salary you're not dealing with vCJD :)
Positive thoughts
Thank you Fishmanpa,
I know that this is a probable sign of my anxiety, but is my anxiety just anxiety or anxiety resulting from the disease ? That's the part i have difficulties to deal with. Besides i still don't have any appetite, when i eat i feel full very quickly, and as a result i'm losing weight.
DisgracedAngel
11-07-16, 11:59
Anxiety can cause a lot more problems than you think. I'd say your anxiety is taking over which is why you're feeling these things. Anxiety caused by the one and only Dr Google.
When I am at high anxiety, I tend to lose my appetite straight away. I've hardly eaten the last few days myself because of it.
MyNameIsTerry
11-07-16, 12:27
There is am interesting link from Josh1234 in this thread that may be worth a look.
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=185499
There are tons of dizziness threads on here so whilst this may not apply, it might be more people you can talk to.
A common indicator of HA is skewed perception towards the rare at the cost of not considering all the other possibilities, and the rare is always something nasty & scary. That's because of Cognitive Distortions in anxiety and depression.
As countrygirl has mentioned, neck problems come into play. Upper back soreness may suggest postural issues.
There are other threads on here with suggestions and even exercises that can prove certain things.
Swallowing problems are also very common in anxiety. It's not always that it has changed either, just that we are perceiving a normal bodily function incorrectly due to anxiety.
---------- Post added at 12:27 ---------- Previous post was at 12:18 ----------
Here is a thread I was thinking of.
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=178684
The OP was worried about brain tumour, which it wasn't and it's a typical HA worry, but I'm pointing this out because it may initially be triggering for you. But the posts by Debs71 and pulisa might give you something else to think about.
With your thread title, some people may miss that the thread is about vertigo.
There is am interesting link from Josh1234 in this thread that may be worth a look.
There are tons of dizziness threads on here so whilst this may not apply, it might be more people you can talk to.
A common indicator of HA is skewed perception towards the rare at the cost of not considering all the other possibilities, and the rare is always something nasty & scary. That's because of Cognitive Distortions in anxiety and depression.
As countrygirl has mentioned, neck problems come into play. Upper back soreness may suggest postural issues.
There are other threads on here with suggestions and even exercises that can prove certain things.
Swallowing problems are also very common in anxiety. It's not always that it has changed either, just that we are perceiving a normal bodily function incorrectly due to anxiety.
---------- Post added at 12:27 ---------- Previous post was at 12:18 ----------
Here is a thread I was thinking of.
The OP was worried about brain tumour, which it wasn't and it's a typical HA worry, but I'm pointing this out because it may initially be triggering for you. But the posts by Debs71 and pulisa might give you something else to think about.
With your thread title, some people may miss that the thread is about vertigo.
Thank you Terry,
That thread was very interesting. I'm not afraid of brain tumour though, because i already did a cerebral MRI scan a few weeks ago, with contrast product and all that, which went smoothly and gave normal results without visible anomalies.
No, i'm really afraid of something along the lines of vCDJ, because the results and tests can be perfectly normal within the first few months (early stages) and show nothing.
In fact, in most cases of vCDJ they usually shown nothing outside of the ordinary until it's too late and you already have severe cognitive impairment. That disease really is the "HA paradise", long incubation time (decades), can show up at any times, can show up as "standard" psychiatric issues or dizziness in the beginning, is always lethal because there's no cure or treatment, and is extremely hard to diagnose correctly antemortem.
It's very apparent that reassurance and factual statistics aren't making a dent in your fear (it never does anyway). That being said, there is the fact that you're posting this fear on anxiety forums so somewhere deep down you know what the real issue is. Are you getting help for your anxiety?
Positive thoughts
http://www.bseinfo.org/vcjd.aspx
Interesting stat that something called a "pulvinar sign" is fairly prevelant on MRI.
You've had MRI and it ain't there.
It's very apparent that reassurance and factual statistics aren't making a dent in your fear (it never does anyway). That being said, there is the fact that you're posting this fear on anxiety forums so somewhere deep down you know what the real issue is. Are you getting help for your anxiety?
Positive thoughts
I will start a therapy on Thursday.
Interesting stat that something called a "pulvinar sign" is fairly prevelant on MRI.
You've had MRI and it ain't there.
My MRI scan wasn't done in FLAIR.
http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs180/en/
Also, interesting stats of there never being a case in Switzerland and now only 2 a year in the UK where it was easily most prevalent.
I can't say anything as I've been going through my own personal hell for the last 3 months but of all the diseases you've picked this is probably the least likely there is! I wish I'd chosen this one as I'd be able to talk myself in to the fact that I definitely don't have it.
Don't get me wrong, i'm thankful for you answers Colicab and i'm not trying to "prove" anyone wrong, i'm just stuck in a loop i can't seem to get out from.
Yes there was no cases of vCJD reported in Switzerland, but i traveled at lot of times in Italy as a child and in Ireland too (it was a very short trip though, somewhere in 2005, three of four days at most and i don't remember eating meat).
Hi Laurent,i have been there and done this one,i was even worrying about it while having a chest x ray,thought i had lung cancer too.I am not a doctor but you do not have mad cow.dizziness and swaying are top of the list for h/a.I did the same as you big mistake,Fishmanpa is right your chances of having it are about as remote as being hit by a meteorite so let it go easier said than done i know, but you are fine apart from h/a
Thank geezer,
I feel bad today.
I have difficulties swallowing, like i have a sea urchin in the middle of the throat. I try to put that on the fact that temperatures are playing the yo-yo these past few days and maybe i caught a cold, especially yesterday since it rained and my socks were wet, but still, it adds to the anxiety and i really don't need that at the moment... :sad:
I can't deal with the anxiety anymore.
I obviously caught a cold (yellow mucus and itchy throat doesn't lie) but i have no fever.
But i feel so bad, so weak, dead inside.
I have difficulties talking to my relatives and when i do it's with a monotone, weak and tired voice. I have difficulties sleeping, in fact i didn't sleep last night, it seems i can't sleep anymore, anxiety either wakes me up or keeps me awake, i don't know.
Help. I just feel like all of this is a progression of the disease, i don't want to die.
I will start a therapy on Thursday.
Let us know how your therapy appointment goes today!
Positive thoughts
Let us know how your therapy appointment goes today!
Positive thoughts
It went... okay. He mostly asked some questions about my childhood and all that.
I guess a therapy need some time to show some effects, but i'm still anxious as ever. I'm still convinced i have vCJD. Plus i feel terribly unbalanced tonight, i can't stand on one leg, which is new...
It went... okay. He mostly asked some questions about my childhood and all that.
I guess a therapy need some time to show some effects,
Yep... information gathering session. It takes time and you'll need to work at it but things will improve. Congrats on taking a positive step!
Positive thoughts
It keeps getting worse and worse. The tiredness is out of this world and my eyes are literally burning.
The funny thing is that i'm not even anxious anymore. I'm just frustrated and tired beyond any kind of imagination.
I know for a fact that this is physical, or neurological, whatever. I know myself way too much. There's no way in hell such a state is "simply" due to something psychical.
Probably not MS since the MRI was clear on that regard, but vCJD remains entirely possible, so is everything else. There's nothing more awful than feeling worse and worse by the day while nobody wants to hear your complaints. The whole "anxiety" thing is overrated and overused by the medical community. This should be a ****ing crime.
I hear you loud and clear mate. At the height of my meltdown I completely rejected that a mental issue like anxiety and depression could cause such significant physical symptoms.
I had constant headaches, dizziness (like the ground was a bouncy castle), balance issues, tremors, twitching, exhaustion and crippling anxiety (crying, shaking, etc).
But, I'm getting siginicantly better now, this is due to acceptance, medication and support.
You are ok, I promise, you just need to allow yourself to believe you're ok. Get up in the morning and do the things you'd normally do, have a coffee, read the paper, go for a walk. Give yourself distractions and you will get better.
MyNameIsTerry
18-07-16, 13:52
If you're having a period of fatigue, the anxiety tends to go for a time. Mine has decreased many a time when fatigue has taken over.
It also happens after heightened periods of anxiety and panic attacks as stated by others on here.
You say you know it as a fact but then if your belief was total, I don't believe you would be talking on here. Doesn't some even small part of you doubt it?
If you're having a period of fatigue, the anxiety tends to go for a time. Mine has decreased many a time when fatigue has taken over.
It also happens after heightened periods of anxiety and panic attacks as stated by others on here.
You say you know it as a fact but then if your belief was total, I don't believe you would be talking on here. Doesn't some even small part of you doubt it?
Back a week ago ? I was doubtful, yes.
Now ? No doubts. I'm convinced there's something going on and that the anxiety is (and was) merely a side-effect.
MyNameIsTerry
18-07-16, 22:49
Convinced that something is going on but not necessarily what you fear? So, why can't it be something benign that you are then taking the symptoms and attaching to your greatest fears?
Gunnery Sgt
21-07-16, 00:18
Mate. I feel your pain, and I know exactly how you feel - and while we can offer words of encouragement - it won't convince you that you don't have this nasty disease, only time will do that.
How do I know? Because I had it about 15 years ago! Nobody could tell me otherwise, it's literally all I thought about, all I talked about, it robbed me of any joy and hope in my life, everything seemed so mundane when I knew for certain that I had 6-12 months to live and that I would die a terrifying, humiliating and undignified death....
I was having regular panic attacks and sleepless nights, I was off work for months due to stress and anxiety and lost a lot of weight.
Every little twitch of my muscles or dizzy spell was confirmation that CJD was taking hold and progressing...
And here I am - 15 years later and I've never felt better :)
I hope this doesn't come across as smug or dismissive - because I know you're going through a living hell at the minute as I was back then... but you're gonna be ok, keep getting the help and advice as it's all good for the healing process.
Keeping you in my thoughts
Thanks for the kind words Gunnery.
I'm still anxious, considerably less than before but still anxious.
I think i'm just starting to be tired of being anxious. I also think that i'm less anxious because i'm absolutely convinced that there's a specific physical reason (be it disease or something else, like a deficit or malabsorption, or vCJD) behind all my symptoms. Talking about vCJD, i'm still scared about it, but every specialist i saw laughed when i mentioned the disease so here's that...
All in all i'm still in pretty bad shape. I wake up every night, always between 2-5 AM and got some strong difficulties to sleep again after that. I'm still tired all the time, sometimes it's bearable, sometimes not. Still a bit confused too, like that derealization feeling.
But the worst symptom, and the main one that make me think that's it's not purely psychological is my eyes. They get tired and strained extremely quickly, and that strains correlates with my pseudovertiginous symptoms. I'm sure there's an interaction between my symptoms and my eyes. I don't know why the ophthalmologist didn't saw anything when i saw him more than a month ago, but there's something.
Laurent this was me 3 years ago, I was absolutely, utterly convinced I had a heart condition. In the warmer months I tend to wake up for the toilet during the night and I remember so distinctly being absolutely terrified of going to the toilet in the dead of the night as I was sure I was going to drop dead. Any physical activity scared the lights out of me. I was out of breath off just walking down the street etc, got palpitations, noticed my pulse was very strong etc.
But 3 years later I no longer have that fear. Perhaps once in a blue moon it will be a passing thought (I still have a very strong pulse but I've learned to accept it). I get less palpitations now, I no longer feel as out of breath with such little exercise (except unsurprisingly when I'm nervous).
One day you will look back and wonder how you overcame such a massive fear. But you will, because I and many others on here have done just that.
MyNameIsTerry
31-07-16, 14:19
Laurent this was me 3 years ago, I was absolutely, utterly convinced I had a heart condition. In the warmer months I tend to wake up for the toilet during the night and I remember so distinctly being absolutely terrified of going to the toilet in the dead of the night as I was sure I was going to drop dead. Any physical activity scared the lights out of me. I was out of breath off just walking down the street etc, got palpitations, noticed my pulse was very strong etc.
But 3 years later I no longer have that fear. Perhaps once in a blue moon it will be a passing thought (I still have a very strong pulse but I've learned to accept it). I get less palpitations now, I no longer feel as out of breath with such little exercise (except unsurprisingly when I'm nervous).
One day you will look back and wonder how you overcame such a massive fear. But you will, because I and many others on here have done just that.
I was the same, KeeKee. Not in a HA way that I thought it was something else, I accepted it was anxiety from the start, but any movement was a fear of creating more of the symptoms I was already terrified of.
I was was truly awful being at that stage.
Laurent this was me 3 years ago, I was absolutely, utterly convinced I had a heart condition. In the warmer months I tend to wake up for the toilet during the night and I remember so distinctly being absolutely terrified of going to the toilet in the dead of the night as I was sure I was going to drop dead. Any physical activity scared the lights out of me. I was out of breath off just walking down the street etc, got palpitations, noticed my pulse was very strong etc.
But 3 years later I no longer have that fear. Perhaps once in a blue moon it will be a passing thought (I still have a very strong pulse but I've learned to accept it). I get less palpitations now, I no longer feel as out of breath with such little exercise (except unsurprisingly when I'm nervous).
One day you will look back and wonder how you overcame such a massive fear. But you will, because I and many others on here have done just that.
Well i will need to stop being tired, confused and spaced out 24 / 7 and my eyes will need to start functioning properly for that.
I'm being ironic, but there's a clear and distinct physical issue behind the anxiety. There were some days where i was absolutely not anxious and still had pseudovertigo and insane fatigue.
As long as the physical root doesn't getter better, get diagnosed or treated the anxiety won't go away. It's a natural reaction to something that doesn't work like it should.
There were some days where i was absolutely not anxious and still had pseudovertigo and insane fatigue.
Keep in mind, that although you feel you were not anxious, you still have an anxiety bonfire burning inside of you. On the days you're really anxious, that fire is blazing and on the days where you don't feel as anxious?... There are still red hot coals burning inside. All it takes is a little fuel and BAM! you're in a highly anxious state again.
The fatigue you feel is your body's way of telling you it's tired of supporting the fire inside. Treating the anxiety is like pouring water on the coals and flames and like a campfire, it takes time for the coals to completely go out.
Positive thoughts
Keep in mind, that although you feel you were not anxious, you still have an anxiety bonfire burning inside of you. On the days you're really anxious, that fire is blazing and on the days where you don't feel as anxious?... There are still red hot coals burning inside. All it takes is a little fuel and BAM! you're in a highly anxious state again.
The fatigue you feel is your body's way of telling you it's tired of supporting the fire inside. Treating the anxiety is like pouring water on the coals and flames and like a campfire, it takes time for the coals to completely go out.
Positive thoughts
This. 100%.
I was a STATE! Tired, irritable, absolutely shocking dizziness and balance issues.
It will end, it has for me. I still have the odd day or 2 but on the whole I am a whole lot better and I, like you, was utterly convinced that there was something real going on.
Anxiety does that, it is an absolute shit.
I've been quiet for the past month as ive been struggling quite hard. I had some "correct" times, and some bad times. Right now i'm in a bad time.
The thoughts of vCJD are back in full force because it seems that i'm not able to determine which element in a visual scene is truly "right" anymore. Like i'm not able to determine if something is straight, or if i'm straight, or who is straight between the element or me, like a confusion that obviously creates anxiety. It's like i'm now unsure about the whole word surrounding me, i have no confidence in my most basic proprioceptive senses anymore. I just don't know anymore. I feel i'm going full blown crazy. This is purgatory.
You are NOT crazy, you are anxious. Stp googling possible illnesses and get your anxiety treated , everything else will then follow. I recommend this website www.getselfhelp.co.uk to everyone who has health anxiety or any other anxiety.
That sounds pretty awful.
I'm 100% confident that you don't have CJD. But it sounds like you're having a bad time, funnily enough I had a CJD obsessed few days but I realised that the likelihood of it is so intensely remote that it just isn't realistic.
You need to come to this realisation (sounds so so easy) but you do, logic needs to intervene and you will calm down and these odd sensations and feels will cease.
I haven't experienced what you describe but I have read about something called de realisation which is a pretty common symptom of anxiety.
Salut Laurent,
j'ai exactement la même chose que toi et je lutte. Je suis traitée depuis 6 mois pour des TOC (parce que oui, c'est cela que tu as). Je suis aussi passée par la phase émétophobe, comme toi....
Maintenant, c'est les prions et la ncjd, avec notamment des fixettes sur les croquettes de chats parce que j'en ai (peut-être) mangé 2-3 quand j'avais 7 ans, c'est les fixettes sur mes voyages en angleterre, c'est des fixettes sur la seule fois de ma vie où j'ai mangé des ris de veaux en France en 1991, c'est des fixettes sur.... bref c'est l'angoisse sur toutes choses que je ne peux plus changer, résolument...mais l'angoisse est là, tuante. Le bœuf, le veau et l'agneau n'ont plus le droit d'être mangé chez moi, les croquettes de chat me traumatise car il y a de la graisse de bœuf dedans, bref un enfer. J'apprends jour après jour à vivre avec grâce à la thérapie, il y a des hauts et des bas mais j'entrevois de l'espoir en tout cas par moments, ce qui déjà mieux qu'avant.
Je te souhaite beaucoup e courage, bon weekend
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.