HIV again...

[Db2grzi5]

I'm back panicking about this again. Slept with a guy using a condom last week (was a bit tipsy so don't remember every single exact detail) but he's someone I knew who had been in a long term relationship and he seemed like a nice genuine guy, no alarm bells. The week before we had 'hooked up' but didn't have actual sex although there was some brief contact 'down there' but not penetration and he didn't come. He didn't come this time either but happened to mention that his ex had some kind of immune system problem where she has to take medication every day. He also half drunkenly said there are serious things he wanted to ask me about. For some reason, at the time, neither of these things registered and we carried on until it became clear he had had too much to drink to finish and then (I think - this is one of the bits I can't remember details of) went to sleep.

Didn't think anything of it until a day later, with a bit of a hangover, feeling sorry for myself, but now feeling terrified that he was saying his ex was HIV positive in some casual way and now I might be too from him. And that this was the serious thing he wanted to talk about. At the time I just thought he meant stuff about his relationship and my recent break up etc.

I can't bring myself to ask him about it via text, will have to wait til I next see him, and yesterday I went to pharmacy, gp and casualty on a wild goose chase for the PEP but they said they didn't recommend me taking it and that it is quite serious medication to take. I felt OK about that then but had a sleepless night due to diarrhoea and cystitis and now am in a full blown panic.

Please help.

[Mercime]

There's lot of reasons somebody would be taking meds for immunity issues and HIV would be way down the list of probabilities, plus he used a condom so you should have nothing to worry about.
But, I've got to ask - if you have this fear, why on earth are you having sex with somebody when you're drunk enough to only remember certain details? It doesn't make sense really, does it? If you're that far gone, there is always a risk that the condom gets forgotten about - then you are putting yourself at risk.

[Db2grzi5]

Of course. But we all make mistakes and I have been miserable so long I just wanted to have some fun for once. I'm just praying it hasn't ruined my life.

[Lifelonganxiety!]

HIV is rare in the UK. Combine that with the fact it's actually very hard to transmit and that using a condom makes this a low risk encounter I'd say the chances of you catching HIV are slim to none from this.

The only thing you can do to be sure is wait and get a test, but also have a frank discussion with this guy and just ask him about what's on your mind. You don't need to be direct, just ask him what he meant by the serious things he had to say, if he keeps skirting the issue, then just ask him straight up.