Advice from parents - convinced my daughter is really unwell... [Archive]

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Mrschurchill

22-07-16, 19:56

jayware33

22-07-16, 20:04

Ok so there's no denying I've suffered from HA for a number of years now and I have FINALLY been referred for psychology treatment from my doctor!(yay!)
But lately, my HA has caused me to become obsessed with the notion that my 3 year old daughter will get cancer (only ever cancer).
She gets a high temp once every 2-3 months. She's usually got a sniffle or a cough. But the big big trigger for me (apart from the high temps which terrify me) are bruises!! She's been away with grandparents since Monday and came home today. I was getting her into the bath and noticed on her back, just left of her spine, a small yellow bruise. I'd say about the size of a 5p. I'm absolutely freaking out! How can she even get a bruise there?!
Please someone tell me I'm being a very overly worried parent.... Please!!! :scared15:

Hi,

I think that because you're already worried, you'll look for minor things, and blow them out of proportion. The fact the bruise is yellow indicates it's an older bruise and it's healing. She's a kid, she will play and bump into things; it's what they do :).

I think you're looking way too much into it. Nothing points towards cancer; only your mind makes you believe there is something more. Don't let your anxiety pass over to your kid; you'll only become paranoid about her every sniffle.

Mrschurchill

22-07-16, 20:19

Hi Jayware33,

Thanks for responding. I'm at the end of my tether HA wise and my referral cannot come through quick enough.
I've become obsessed with it now. Like you said, it's as if I'm looking for it! My other half says it's nothing to worry about.
It's the absolute worst thought in the world, losing my daughter. It actually pains me how much love I have for her.

jayware33

22-07-16, 20:25

No problem.

I think that's the issue right there, well, not an issue, as such. You said you're so scared and don't want anything to happen to her, and quite rightly so; however, it's become such an obsession that it's turned into an OCD. You are so focuses on her health that it's consuming your thoughts and if it continues, could become an unhealthy thing. You don't want it to escalate and continue. It's good to worry, but we need to know when it's getting too deep. Having anxiety ourselves makes it so much more challenging as were naturally going to worry, not only about us, but about others close to us too.

I think you need to seek some help for yourself first, this way, your own anxiety is eased, which means you'll not worry as much about your daughter.

Hope that makes sense ? :)

KeeKee

22-07-16, 20:35

Mrschurchill when I was bathing my daughter last night I seen a bruise on her back too. I mentioned it to her (she is 9) and she said it could have been from when she was leaning against a corner of a wall at school. It was almost healed. That worry came into my head for a split second but quickly faded as I know bruising when related to Leukemia is not a small bruise here and there. It's large bruises and shows alongside other symptoms too. I feared having Leukemia myself last year as I did and still do get many bruises on my legs. But I was told it 'doesn't present this way'.
As for the regular temps, very common in a child that age. My daughter was quite 'sickly' as a preschooler but grew out if it.

Mrschurchill

22-07-16, 20:39

It's definitely obsession. I can keep myself awake at night worrying about losing her. It's absolutely awful! I've never thought about it as OCD though. Always ring that with turning the light switch on and off 10 times before leaving the room.
You are right though! I need to combat this before it ruins my life (I do feel at this point it's taken over).
My doctor told me that worry wasn't a bad thing, it's only when it's gets to this stage!

---------- Post added at 20:39 ---------- Previous post was at 20:36 ----------

Mrschurchill when I was bathing my daughter last night I seen a bruise on her back too. I mentioned it to her (she is 9) and she said it could have been from when she was leaning against a corner of a wall at school. It was almost healed. That worry came into my head for a split second but quickly faded as I know bruising when related to Leukemia is not a small bruise here and there. It's large bruises and shows alongside other symptoms too. I feared having Leukemia myself last year as I did and still do get many bruises on my legs. But I was told it 'doesn't present this way'.
As for the regular temps, very common in a child that age. My daughter was quite 'sickly' as a preschooler but grew out if it.

Thanks KeeKee. She's been away to a caravan with her grandparents and cousin for the week so no doubt be jumping about crazy! It's very faint yellow but when I seen it I could have vomited! My other half literally shrugged his shoulders! :doh:

I am at my wits end! Why do I have to have these thoughts?

jayware33

22-07-16, 20:42

An OCD presents when we obsess about something, or, repetitive checking. I agree, dealing with the anxiety in yourself should ease it off about your daughter.

She seems fine, and remember, kids immune systems develop as the age, so, don't be afraid to let her out and get dirty; it's healthy and builds a strong immune system. Sniffles are common and kids will pick up a lot of bugs as their immune systems grow stronger with age.

John

Mrschurchill

22-07-16, 21:54

Yeah you're right. It's difficult at the moment as bruise aside, her temp is through the roof and she's got the most horrific cough! Poor wee lamb :( and we have a wedding tomorrow! God knows if I'm even gonna make it!

jayware33

22-07-16, 22:08

Aww, what a shame. Just make sure she has some paracetamol as this will bring down her temperature.

If it's been a few days then you could always get the GP to check her over. Likelihood is, it's a viral thing that will pass. Terrible timing though :).

Mrschurchill

25-07-16, 07:54

Wonderful.... She's just taken her first ever nosebleed! Anxiety is making me sick!

andysa

25-07-16, 09:58

Take a step back and breathe a bruise on a little on is the most normal thing in the world my daughter had so many on her legs the other day I was convinced day care would think she was being beaten. Also kids have nose bleeds just stop the bleeding and all will be ok don't let things build up

Mrschurchill

25-07-16, 10:08

I know. I know I'm completely over reacting! I honestly never thought of it as OCD but that's completely what it is! It was only one nostril and it stopped after 10 mins. She's had the cold for a couple of days and picks it a lot! (Wee midden!)
I know deep down if she had C she'd be really unwell and she's not! She jumps about daft and eat likes a horse! I'm patiently wait on my appointment with a counsellor so hoping soon it'll be less of an issue. X

KeeKee

25-07-16, 10:17

My daughter had her first nosebleed a few weeks ago and it was a shock, but I Googled it and nosebleeds in children are apparent common. Google actually helped me for once haha. Yes you are right she wouldn't be herself is she wasn't well plus she's just had a cold and some people get scabs up their noses with colds.

Mrschurchill

25-07-16, 10:35

Yeah my nephew gets nosebleeds quite a lot. They just tend to grow out of them. But the fact she has the cold and never has the finger out of it makes it 99% normal. That wee 1% still on my mind though!

Mrschurchill

25-07-16, 20:46

Are other parents just as bad with worry about their little ones or is it mainly themselves. I'd say I'm equal if not more obsessed with my daughters symptoms (if any!)