View Full Version : Anxiety, its all in our head??
Many moons ago around the age of 19 i found myself in my Drs office having a bad panick attack and getting some of the best and worst advice of my life. A nurse came in to take my blood pressure, it was of course off the charts because i was having a panick attack..the reason i was there. She looked around, leaned in and with a disgusted tone said to me "oh just knock it off, this is all in your head" she spat as she ripped the cuff off me and left the room. At the time, i was hurt, ashamed and wished it was that simple.
What ive learned over 20 years later is...it is that simple. Whats not simple is getting your mind under control. After countless counselors, therapists, books and soul searching ive come to a conclusion. Anxiety is brought on by one thing. Worrying about the future. It happens so fast sometimes, we dont realize were doing it. So what is the fix? There is only one solution, staying in the moment. It works believe me, the problem is staying in the moment for more than a few minutes and REALLY being there. This i have not even come close to doing, but i am slowly starting to at least try. It is the hardest thing ive ever done but it works when i do. Im reading a book on mindfullness, i would highly suggest it. I still suffer from anxiety but it is truly the only thing ive found that works..problem is trying to stay in the moment for those of us that have made a life out of worrying.
Thank you for your advice. I do see how that makes sense, and I must admit, I did find myself feeling much calmer after spending 5 minutes a day doing mindful meditation for 10 days in a row. However, I lacked the motivation to keep on doing that, so instead, I completely forgot about mindfulness. :( How are you practising it?
Thank you for your advice. I do see how that makes sense, and I must admit, I did find myself feeling much calmer after spending 5 minutes a day doing mindful meditation for 10 days in a row. However, I lacked the motivation to keep on doing that, so instead, I completely forgot about mindfulness. :( How are you practising it? i just have to keep going back to it, over and over again. All day, every day. It seems to be sticking but its a sloowww process. Example: i am staying at a resort now 4 hrs away from my house, a huge trigger for night time anxiety for me. I have a hard time falling asleep away from my comfort zone. Last night at 4am i was riddled with anxiety fretting the next day, wide awake no hope of falling asleep with my heart beating hard, sweating, so close to a full blown panic attack until i remembered to be in the moment. So in the dark, i forced myself to pay attention to exactly what was happening and call it out. The fan was white in color, and turning. The alarm clock light, was bright and red, it was quiet in the room. After about 15 minutes i fell asleep. It is the only thing that works for me, i just have to not give up on it and keep trying. Its not something i do once a day, its a continuous process of asking myself..am i living in the moment? I then focus on my surroundings and after about 15 min forget about it until a few hours later ill ask myself again, and again and again. Ive found its getting easier but slowly.
That's really interesting. I'm definitely going to try this myself as I often get depersonalisation, so being 'in the moment' might actually alleviate my symptoms, come to think about it. Thanks again for sharing your experience and advice. :)
Hi there,
That nurse sounded really insensitive. Someone suffering with anxiety especially in the early stages cannot just snap out of it that quickly.
Grounding yourself is a great practice to get you out of your head. Describing your surroundings and where you are can most times help you stop the huge panic-ridden scenario your brain creates.
Another good thing I do is a gratitude list of what is here and what is NOW, the good things in my life, what I'm grateful for etc. that also helps. Saying it outloud and sometimes writing it down helps alot too.
Hi there,
That nurse sounded really insensitive. Someone suffering with anxiety especially in the early stages cannot just snap out of it that quickly.
Grounding yourself is a great practice to get you out of your head. Describing your surroundings and where you are can most times help you stop the huge panic-ridden scenario your brain creates.
Another good thing I do is a gratitude list of what is here and what is NOW, the good things in my life, what I'm grateful for etc. that also helps. Saying it outloud and sometimes writing it down helps alot too.
Good one! Yes, sometimes when im flipping out it helps to remind myself im not in prison, im not in a concentration camp, what is really going on? Yes im laying in bed! No panick is needed...putting things in perspective!
---------- Post added at 22:34 ---------- Previous post was at 22:32 ----------
Yes that nurse was a complete bitch for saying that. This was back in 1988 so panick attacks was just being discovered, at least in my small town.
The hardest thing is knowing it is in our head and under our control however trying to access that in a highly anxious person is so difficult. I haven't had a panic attack in 12yrs but it is my biggest fear and the anxious thoughts still power through my mind. I started mindfulness 4 months ago and it definitely gives you a different relationship to things but it's not easy. Changing a life time of negative thinking will not be an overnight solution for me.
The nurse is clearly someone who has no understanding the complexities of the mind and if we could snap out of it there wouldn't be such an epidemic today. I see it as through evolution our brain remains essentially the same from many years ago which in today's high paced technological society it's not adapted enough to cope. I actually envy the tribes who live close to nature as they do not suffer from these conditions due to their simplistic lifestyle. Maybe I should go join them, who's with me?!
Hi Saltlick
'Living in the moment' - Wow, now that really does sound like good advice. Today, I have a somewhat stressful situation to handle. I shall indeed set about trying your advice. Many thanks for sharing the idea. Pip78
Well, nows my time to put up or shutup. Im about to face my biggest fear. In 2 days im taking a 5hr flight and staying for 7 days by myself in a strange state. So, here we are 2 days before and my mind is going nuts! I am trying to practice being in the moment but my mind keeps dragging me back saying "warning! Warning! Time to worry!! Have panick attacks! Fight or flight ahhhhhh!!!!" So its one thing for me to preach being in the moment but another thing to practice it in the middle of an attack. Its like holding a cat, then turn on the vacuum and tell him to calm down..doesnt work that great lol. But i keep trying and it is working..not every minute but now is the time to truly practice it.
I have to agree that these are definately words of wisdom (but also easier said then done in some cases). My doctor has repeatedly told me though, if you practice 'staying in the moment' and not obsessing about the future, your mind will learn from what you are doing instead of having anticipatory anxiety. Practice and doing it regularly is the key. Good luck with everything, have a nice time while your away. You have all the right ideas to get you there calmly. Tracy x
WiredIncorrectly
23-08-16, 13:55
Spot on, I agree with you OP!
I too was diagnosed around the same age. I'm 32 this year. It hasn't got easier to deal with. I remember even as a young boy I had anxieties. As young as 6 years old. I got a thorn stuck in my leg and was convinced it was going to get infected and I'd have to have my leg removed. Shortly after that I believed I was going blind. And after that I believed I had diabetes. These things plagued me for months and I went from one fear to the next at such a young age.
Therapy doesn't help, medications are useless. It's just a crappy situation all around.
Anyone who tells me it's in my head and can be cured ... I call them a liar. It's fantastic news to sufferers who have been cured and can live a normal life, but I think we all suffer differently and the reason for panic attacks is very personal and different amongst sufferers. Those who can't seem to cure their anxiety (like myself, and others) likely have a different genetic makeup that makes us more prone.
I was born premature. Born with Aspergers too. I think they both play a huge part in why I suffer with anxiety. From what I've learnt about Aspergers there's only ever coping strategies and never a cure.
I'm not saying anxiety can't be cured in some people. I believe it can. But those people may have anxiety for different reasons.
I for example have anxiety about almost everything. Here's a short list:
* Fear of choking when eating
* Fear of going outside
* Fear of being around other people
* Fear of being alone
* Fear of failure
* Fear of sleeping
* Fear of hunger
* Fear of any ache and pain in my body
* Fear of open spaces
* Fear of heat
... This list for me is very long and I couldn't list them all. To tackle all of my fears would mean tackling one at a time. I've tried it. Done therapy. My therapist was confused when I didn't respond to treatment.
So I'm now just left to deal with it. I've accepted it and accepted thats this will be with me for life.
Certain things do help. Eating good. Exercise. Having a steady income and not being broke most of the time. That will increase my mood, but the anxiety is still ever present.
I'd love to take part in a research trial, because I believe I'm an extreme case.
It's not in my head. It's because I'm wired incorrectly from birth.
:bighug1:
Many moons ago around the age of 19 i found myself in my Drs office having a bad panick attack and getting some of the best and worst advice of my life. A nurse came in to take my blood pressure, it was of course off the charts because i was having a panick attack..the reason i was there. She looked around, leaned in and with a disgusted tone said to me "oh just knock it off, this is all in your head" she spat as she ripped the cuff off me and left the room. At the time, i was hurt, ashamed and wished it was that simple.
Obviously in the wrong job.
So what is the fix? There is only one solution, staying in the moment.
I agree.
AlwaysOnEdge
11-12-16, 12:49
It's just so hard to believe that Anxiety can produce such real physical reactions. I have big time health anxiety so I am always performing a self diagnostic scan for any slightly abnormal feeling. Currently I've had ear buzzing since last night, somewhat worrisome as it came out of the blue but this too I guess can be anxiety.
I tried meds recently and had to stop after one dose of Zoloft, bad reaction and ended up at ER. and after two doses of Paxil, felt like I could actually feel it screwing with me and loss of control is not something I'd be willing to deal with.
So I just get up everyday, some days free of anxiety and some days not, and get through it somehow.
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