Vacation anticipatory anxiety

[worried 101]

Hi there.
I go on holiday next weekend and I am so anxious about it. I have suffered with anxiety and depression for years and holidays have always been a source of anxiety for me. However the last two holidays I went on i actually enjoyed even though I experienced anxiety before them both. Due to this I wasn't expecting to feel this anxious this year as I have conquered quite a few major anxiety provoking events such as moving house and getting married. Both I did on a high dose of my medication at the time which I have significantly cut due to my success with tackling these issues and I have been doing OK upto this point. Now I'm struggling really bad. I try to rationalise with myself, but it's like no positive thoughts can get through and I'm having panic attacks alot.
Has anyone been though similar and can give me any advice would be really appreciated.
I feel like I know what to do but my mind and body just won't do it.
Thankyou

[Sunflower2]

Hello,

I have struggled with this a lot. I travel a few times a year and most of the time I'll be anxious before hand to the point where I'm wishing I wasn't going! Recently I went to Lithuania and the weeks beforehand, I was in a right anxious state! I just worried about everything that could go wrong, Unknown food, Unknown place, Unknown hotel.. It was all quite overwhelming.

But, I had a really good time despite some difficulties. It was one of the more challenging places I've been! Before I went I tried to focus on the present and every time I had a worry about it, I would try to rationalise it and look at it logically. I also made up plans to help me feel more prepared. I took lots of home comforts with me too.

After the first night I was fine the whole time! I even tried new things and really enjoyed myself. It's really worth it in the end!! :)

[worried 101]

Thankyou so much for your reply. Though I'm sorry you also suffer from this is good to know I'm not alone!
We are going to a new place so I think that's adding to the anxiety a bit. I've tried to look at pictures to familiarise myself with it all but even that had me thinking stupid things like "you'll be there in a week and you'll be really anxious" which I know does not help the situation but it's like I can't control my thoughts even when I'm trying my best not to think negatively and do something positive.
I'm trying so hard to not let it beat me that its exhausting and the thought of being like this, waiting for another week till we actually go is horrible!
It's so silly as it's a week away and should be nice i feel ungrateful for being like this
I'm tempted to go to my doctor and ask for something to take in the short term which might help in moments line these.
Thankyou again.

[Sunflower2]

Oh I looked at a lot of google maps before I went! And researched the hotel and places I was going! I know it's impossible to think this, but really what you anticipate never actually happens. I did get anxious on holiday, I did cry, I didn't eat enough.. But, the world didn't end. It wasn't half as bad as I was expecting and in the moment you do always deal with it! In fact, I faced more challenges on holiday than I was actually expecting too, and I even managed them!

But yes, I also felt ungrateful, especially as it was a family wedding I was going to!! Here I was getting worked up over an event to celebrate a marriage!

I sort of just accepted that I was probably going to get anxious. I was most likely also going to get a bit homesick and it was going to be hard. Accepting that made it seem a bit easier to deal with because I wasn't fighting with myself about trying to be fine all the time.

[shotokansho]

Hey there.
I totally get this and you have my sympathy. Im exactly the same. Im so anxious before a holiday that I begin to wish something would happen to prevent me from going. However when I get there and I've settled I do have a nice time, although I can feel a little over alert. Im going to benidorm in 4 weeks and I can already feel the panic slipping in, I think I'll be off to the doctors this time before I travel.
Hope things work out for you.
Kez xx

[worried 101]

Thankyou to you both for your replies :)
Annoyingly I started to feel a bit better yesterday eve but woke up again feeling really anxious. It's like being on the worst roller coaster ever.
I think my issue is one holiday I couldn't hack it and I suffered a nervous breakdown (this was not just because of the holiday I had alot of other issues) but part off me is so scared of getting that poorly again and the fear of it happening again even though my last two holidays have been fine plays on my mind alot. I was on a much higher dose of meds before so I don't know if that played a part in the lady two being easier to handle even though I did experience anxiety before north.
I feel sort of disappointed in myself as been through so many challenges and done really well but there's something about holidays which I still really struggle with.
Thankyou for your support guys. Although my husband is very understanding I think it's hard for him to get any interest can be so anxious about something nice! Nice to speak to people who get what its like.
Kez I hope you can get the support you need from your doctor and that the anxious feelings don't become too overwhelming. However if it does don't for get youre not alone. X

[shotokansho]

Hey!
Have you maybe asked for some diazepam for when you travel? I find it really helps to settle my nerves and takes the edge off a little. I used to get quite tipsy at the airport but I don't do that anymore so the diaz helps. Xx

[worried 101]

Hiya.
I have lorazepam and diazapam so they are there if I need them. What is probably going to sound even more silly is that in not actually going on a plane or anything like that, and yet I'm still so worried! Thankyou for your advice though as its some comfort to know that its thereally if things get to tough. The thing is I know I'll most likely be fine once I'm there. It's just all the waiting that's so hard.

[AZgirl]

Hi! I'm new here, just posted a plea for help in a new thread before I found yours. I will be traveling overseas in a few weeks, 8th time to same place, but anxiety returns worse every year! Even on short trips this tends to happen. Sounds similar to your experience, in that I'm fine once I get to the airport or on the road. It's the lead-up time before travel that is debilitating. Hope someone can offer more insight!

[m431]

Hi all
New here! Just posted a similar thread. I've had a couple of bad experiences leading up to past holidays and this time i guess im afraid that the same thing is going to happen again. I try reminding myself that anxiety and worry is somewhat of a self fulfilling prophecy - I'm convincing myself that something is going to go wrong and i'm associating this holiday with all the bad things that have happened before, and If i carry on like this then i'll probably talk myself in to something going wrong.

What i'm trying to do, and what i'd encourage anyone else to do, is quite simply to focus on the positives that have happened before.
You've travelled before and you've gotten through it.
The anxiety leading up to travelling might have been rough but you got through it. Anxious feelings cant last for ever; we know that.
You got through the anxiety and got on holiday.
If you experienced any anxiety on holiday you obviously got through that because you're here now!
I'm trying to convince myself of the phrase "I might not like it but I can do it" - I just hope that If i can get myself to the airport in one piece and settle down then i'll be alright.

I hope some of that helps... I'm not coping that well myself at the moment either and I could definitely do with practising what i'm preaching! Personally I quite like being able to talk to others and try help others with similar anxieties as it almost helps me gain a little more understanding in whats going on in my own head and gives me that bit of confidence that If i can help someone else understand their thoughts and deal with something then I should be able to help myself!

When's everyones holiday dates? I'm feeling some sort of ongoing support group here; make sure we all get through our holidays in one piece!
I fly early morning Thursday 18th August, so i think Tuesday & Wednesday will be the big days for me...

Hope to speak to everyone soon!

C

[wantpeace]

Yes. Got exactly what you described a few weeks ago. All we were doing was going from East London to the south coast of Wales for 14 days. My mood dipped horrendously and my anxiety really spiked for the 2 weeks before. A few days before, I felt I really, really did not want to go.

The journey was 7 hours. It should have been 4 but the traffic was terrible near Bristol and Cardiff.

Even so, about an hour before I got to the destination I started to feel ok about it. When we were there, I was fine most of the time. I even started to feel my old self. During the holiday, I had the best 2-3 days I've had in the past 9 months.

I think a lot of it was to do with routine. I don't like changing routine. Also, when I'm in a goood routine, I don't like it interupted.

[Budgieboy]

Do many of you take Diazepan for flying anxiety?

I have avoided planes for years and the thought of flying and crashing terrifies me.

Strangely, when I was younger I loved flying. :(

Cheers, Jon

[worried 101]

Thanks to everyone for their posts on this,its good to get advice from others and know im not alone. Jon I havent taken diazepam before flying so i dont know how effective it is. I have taken in before and found it very relaxing to the point of it pretty much knocking me out, but that will differ with person and dosage I imagine.
Supporting each other sounds like a good plan. Sometimes its just reassuring to know there are other people experiencing the same thing.
I feel the same as you C as I know what I need to do and can give others advice but actually using it myself I struggle with. Even when Im trying to be logical and control my thoughts they seem to just go haywire and my body just dosent listen and the panic sets in.
I've got a week till we go and Im just hoping the sooner it comes the less anxious I will feel. I know im catastrophizing the situation in my head but I just wish I knew how to stop!:doh:

[wantpeace]

I've got a week till we go and Im just hoping the sooner it comes the less anxious I will feel. I know im catastrophizing the situation in my head but I just wish I knew how to stop!:doh:

It's awful isn't it. I get anticipatory anxiety for so many things, incluidng flying, and it's so difficult to stop it. Are you able to break things down into the tiniest steps, so it's not one huge monster you're facing? Maybe list all the things you will do, in the minutest detail and challenge any of them that make you feel anxious, e.g.

from....


Make a list of the things I need to take on holiday
Work out which suitcase I'm taking
Put the suitcase in a place where I can pack it
Empty the suitcase
Add each thing from item 1 to the suitcase

to (on the day, and the night before)....


Prepare the clothes I'm going to do the journey in.
Wake up at x time.
Brush teeth
Take shower.....

and continue through to arriving at your destination.


If you break it down like this, the while experience might seem a whole lot less onerous.


Wishing you peace of mind.
WP

[worried 101]

That's a good idea want peace thankyou. I will definitely try it. I did an online shop yesterday for the holiday and got through that with only a little panic feeling. Breaking it down might be helpful so it's not so overwhelming.
Thankyou again.

[Papakool]

Hi,

I am in the same situation. I always get so worked up before a trip it is ridiculous. It really does seem irrational at times but nevertheless it happens. Doesn't help that the IBS kicks in worse when this happens which of course makes the anxiety worse - you get the picture...big bad circle...lol. You'd think after dealing with this for so long my body would recognize it and settle in but it has this never ending ability to stress out. I agree with m431 with the tips. I also have some Ativan as support in case I need it - which many times I don't, but just having it available helps. I find too that once I get to the destination, taking a bit of time to walk around and familiarize myself with the place and even saying hi to the staff etc. helps to get me relaxed faster.

Good luck worried 101 and know that you are not alone in your fears but stay brave!

[Annie0904]

I get like this before holidays too even though I have enjoyed previous ones. I am now trying hypnotherapy and have my 4th session this week.

[worried 101]

Thankyou for your replies,advice and support :)
Papakool I am exactly the same when it comes to anxiety thinking I should recognise the irrational fear by now and no how to handle it but every time it knocks me sideways!
I'm actually feeling alot better now that it's getting closer and although the anxiety is still there, it's alot less which is such a relief as last week was a really bad one.
I have been tempted by hypnotherapy and tried it fot a very short period and found it wasn't quite for me. However I know alot of people have found it very beneficial so hoping it's working for you Annie.

I hope everyone else is doing well if they're on their travels or feeling ok leading up to it.