Do you question yourself?

[Andy1718]

So I ask myself everyday - how am I feeling today?
I wish I could stop this as it adds to my anxiety and just go with the flow. It is amazing that with anxiety you question every rise in heart beats, every thought, every ache and so on. It's exhausting! I have been feeling really good lately but I am having a few doubts. I am due back to work in three weeks and it scares me to death. I don't get the anxiety as much thinking about it but I can't stop the thoughts of what ifs! This is going to be a massive test for me and I am wondering how I will feel nearer the time? My body aches with tension 24/7.
It's make or break for my career but got to give it a go. I am scared physically whether I can teach more as my chronic back condition doesn't help and the anxiety adds to the pain! Was feeling great but not so today, welcome to the cit roller coaster.

[Mojo61]

Oh yes Andy, I could have written this post myself! When I'm feeling good I don't even think about the anxiety, I'm "normal" if you like, but as soon as I start feeling a bit odd again (or thinking I'm feeling odd) I start all the questioning again - is it coming back? Will it ever truly go? How long am I going to be down for this time? Is the insomnia and racing thoughts going to reappear? Perhaps I need another increase? and blah de blah de blah.... drives me bloody nuts!

I think it's where we've had such a dreadful few months, I don't know about you but I've never suffered from anything like this before in my entire life so it came as such a shock, and still in the back of my mind I think there must be a physical reason for it all because how can something like anxiety make one so unwell?

I've been told it eventually goes and not to let blips or setbacks etc bother me so I try to remain positive and hopeful and say to myself "Gill, you ARE getting better but it is just going to take a long time" That seems to help.

What are you going this weekend, have you anything planned?

[Andy1718]

Thanks for your reply. Hope you are on the road to recovery. Going away with family for three days so anxiety is a little high but just got to suck it up and get on with it. Really felt that tablets were working but had a couple of blips now. The tiredness is killing me! Might ask doc for some sleeping tablets.

[Mojo61]

Are you not sleeping properly Andy?

---------- Post added at 18:28 ---------- Previous post was at 18:27 ----------

The tablets will be working, you have to accept blips as an inevitable part of the recovery process.

[Andy1718]

I suffer with back pain and muscle tension from the anxiety so sleeping is not good at all. Can't stop thinking of work either.

[Mojo61]

Perhaps a muscle relaxant would help?

[dale12345]

I really hope you feel better

[skymaid]

So I ask myself everyday - how am I feeling today?
I wish I could stop this as it adds to my anxiety and just go with the flow. It is amazing that with anxiety you question every rise in heart beats, every thought, every ache and so on. It's exhausting! I have been feeling really good lately but I am having a few doubts. I am due back to work in three weeks and it scares me to death. I don't get the anxiety as much thinking about it but I can't stop the thoughts of what ifs.

I know exactly what you mean I often describe the feeling as being "stuck in my own head". sometimes I'm so obsessed with my own thoughts I'm doing stuff in real life without actually doing it (like getting out of the shower then realising if forgot to actually use the soap and having to get back in).

constant what ifs and self analysis are utterly exhausting.

sometimes I think "how is my anxiety at the minute?" probably a lot less if I stopped asking myself that