Fear of Pancreatic Cancer

[AlexBogues]

Hello everyone, so a short backstory I am 24 Years old recently married (7months) and I think I struggle with Health Anxiety. Back in May I had it convinced in my head that I had Brain Cancer and had a brain MRI done (all clear).

Well recently this month my upper left abdomen started hurting, and then it started radiating to my back. It used to be on and off and now it is near constant. I have had an abdominal ultrasound (they couldn't see my pancreas clearly) that they said was normal, I had an Upper GI with Esophogram (chest X-rays where they make you drink dye). Then just a regular chest X-Ray.

Well I didn't know when you drink that contrast stuff it makes your stool white (and the place where I got it done didn't warn me either). So I went to the ER thinking all my worst fears had come true and that I was dying. They did another abdominal ultrasound (didn't look at the pancreas for some reason) and said it looked fine. I have had multiple blood tests all coming back normal as well. My doctor even let me have a CA 19-9 blood test to test for Pancreatic Cancer and that came back normal. He is a great doctor and listens to my fears.

My back and left abdominal pain is still there, I have started looking up online about the CA 19-9 that it can seem normal if your in a certain Lewis negative blood group (which I do not know if I am or not) and am still worrying. My wife and I have talked and I am going to go to a counselor soon.

I do not know what I hope to gain from posting here, I just kind of wanted my thoughts out there. I do not want to die already, I just found my beautiful wife and I do not want to leave her and my family behind.

[Fishmanpa]

Based on all the clear medical tests, you're not going anywhere for a while :)

That being said, if you constantly live in fear of health issues, then you're really not living and it seems you have a lot to live for! Have you looking into some professional help with your health anxiety? (and yes, still doubting and fearing illnesses after getting scientific medical proof you're Ok is a symptom of HA). Being in the US, we have access to mental health care in all 50 states and it's just a phone call away.

Positive thoughts

[AlexBogues]

Thanks, I appreciate the response. I do plan on seeing somebody sometime soon. My wife and I actually just lost one of our cars (the nicer and newer one unfortunately) So I have to take the bus to work for now. Which is not much of a problem but makes it hard for me to do anything after work for now.

Yeah I really want that to be true, I want to be around for a long time. I do not have any family history of really much other than high blood pressure and some minor heart disease.

[skymaid]

thing is with that particular cancer is that the symptoms are vague if any until its already far along and hard to treat. only 4% survival rate so in a weird kind of way its not even worth worrying about.

its also very rare too.

not sure that was reassuring as I hoped it would be. but try and put it out of your mind.

[AlexBogues]

Yeah that is what has me so worried is that it is so easily missed and so deadly especially if it is late.

I feel like I have two main worries is my life. Not knowing things, and dying. I am a christian and I have been for a while but I just don't feel comfortable dying already at 24 years old.

I have also been having a tightness on the left side of my head and neck area, which could easily be stress but it is weird it is only on one side. I struggle with cancer especially because it feels like something I can do almost nothing about. I have never smoked, I only drink occasionally, and am pretty healthy and fit.

[Fishmanpa]

I'm a survivor of two heart attacks, bypass surgery, stents and Stage IV head and neck cancer. I have a son and daughter your age. Take care of yourself...common sense approach. Eat right, exercise, don't smoke (you don't) and don't abuse alcohol (you don't).

At 24 and with your current health, you have a 1.5% chance of getting this in your lifetime!

I'm not one for offering reassurance because it never works but sometimes hard facts help. Essentially I'm saying no way!

As suggested, call the mental health hotline (https://www.mentalhealth.gov/get-help/index.html). You can find help in your area.

Positive thoughts

[AlexBogues]

Thanks again fisherman, yeah I looked up the stats on it and someone getting PC at 24 is like .01 percent or something crazy. I always just think about me being that one case that happens a year.

It does help though, I have trouble working and focusing with all this worrying and it doesn't benefit me in anyway. How old are you by the way Fisherman? That is impressive to survive all those things congrats on beating cancer.

[Fishmanpa]

How old are you by the way Fisherman? That is impressive to survive all those things congrats on beating cancer.

57... 1st heart attack at 47, 2nd heart attack and cancer at 53. I abused the crap out of myself though... smoker (ex), partied like a madman, ate like poo etc.

Like I said, I have kids your age. My daughter suffers from depression and anxiety. She had a rough time but she came to me and I, along with her Mom, made sure she got help. She's in therapy and takes meds. Aside from a blip here and there, she's doing great now.

That train of thought... the "what if?" stuff is hallmark HA thinking. It really should be "F^%$ it" and enjoy your life. Read my signature... take it to heart ya hear?!

Positive thoughts

[AlexBogues]

Thanks, I appreciate it. Yeah I just need to figure out the cause of these left side back pains and just accept that if something bad happens, there is really nothing I can do to change the situation.