There's no happy or right way out

[elik]

I'm just so completely perplexed...

My anxiety causes me to miss out on things and experiences etc so I feel I don't have a lot to say for myself. Underneath this I am intensely sociable and want to be seen in the best version of myself. I feel when I'm talking to people I'm so ashamed of who I am and how embarrassing I am as a person that I am not authentic or 'real' with people because I cannot stand the idea of people associating me with anxiety etc and being branded and stereotyped as they would do. Therefore I am either pushed to avoid people and be real with myself or be around people and feel awful and inferior or be someone I'm not to please people which makes me feel guilty and horrible. I am a mess of a person and I am so ashamed of myself it's not believable. I'm envious of everyone and how they have jobs relationships etc because I won't allow myself any of this because of the way I get....

I have to protect myself from even more embarrassing circumstances

[Cherryade]

I have had anxiety for the past 10 years and I have always hidden it apart from close friends. Now I am a bit more open about it. If I am invited somewhere and I cannot go due to anxiety, I just say, sorry, no can do, am feeling a bit overwhelmed at the mo - it will pass but not just yet. Most folk have understood. I am getting past the stage now when I worry too much about what other folk think. Or I say that I would love to come for a wee while but may leave early - is that ok?