Weight Loss Paradox - can anyone relate?

[Kathryn313]

Hi

I am looking for some opinions and experiences with weight loss. You will see from my posts that weight loss (amongst other things) triggered this bout of HA.

Whenever I lose weight I get concerned that it is due to something underlying, primarily cancer, so then I test this theory by trying to gain weight. If I gain weight then I tell myself that it is unlikely I am ill.

However I am approximately 3 stone over weight, so I know rationally that by losing weight I would be helping myself to get healthy and less prone to illness and (HA voice speaking....) if i was ill, I would give myself a better chance of recovery.

But i am scared to try and lose weight because if the weight loss was due to cancer, it would be disguised as intentional weight loss and not considered an issue until it was too late.

I don't know of anyone else who thinks like this? Can anyone relate?

[Joe Hayes]

Absolutely positively 100% right now. It is a messed up way to think that I am currently engaged in as well.

[ServerError]

Diagnosing cancer is about more than weight. If you had cancer, there'd be other things for doctors to go on. Medical professionals know what they're doing.

Try to be rational: if you make a concerted effort to lose weight, and then notice you've lost weight, try to see the cause and effect.

If you did have cancer, it would make itself known. It wouldn't hide behind any achievements in weight loss.

[dale12345]

Just went to the dr, he said weigthloss alone not a sign of cancer, believe me I obsess all the time about cancer!

[Colicab85]

At the height of my anxiety I lost nearly 2 stone. Completely freaked out about cancer, when it was obvious why I'd lost the weight. My metabolism was in spaced five and I was eating a lot less. But the HA demon just convinced myself that I had cancers throughout my body.

I have subsequently put the weight back on and more.

[Kathryn313]

Thanks for all your replies.

It's odd isn't it...it's my testing behavior which i find unusual, so I lose half a stone then have a couple of days of consuming calories to check I can put weight back on.

[Minivil]

I have been really concerned about this myself. In a year when I was my unhealthiest, I lost about 20 lbs unintentionally. Then was diagnosed with diabetes, and went strict low carb. Now I've lost in the span of fve months another 30 pounds INTENTIONALLY, but of course I'm worried about cancer they didn't find.

[Kathryn313]

Its your final sentence that would sum me up in your circumstance. Its just so illogical, like the brain is stuck in a feedback loop and keeps feeding you the same messages... am going to try and intentionally lose some weight throughout October but the thought of seeing a few pounds lighter on the scales is filling me with dread as opposed to how happy i would have been a few years ago with that outcome. But I know I have to expose myself to this fear.

[Kathryn313]

I am considering going back to Slimming World as I need to get to a healthy weight to lower my risk of the thing I fear.

However I can already sense the panic that will come when I lose 2-3lbs. Even though I would have the evidence of why. I could also imagine me not telling the doctor that was why I was losing weight in order to get investigations. Now that is a dangerous thought!!

[Mercime]

Kathryn, I think the idea of being proactive regarding your weight is an excellent one - it is challenging your thought process.

Without going into detail too much, weight loss is just one symptom of cancer, and what you need to remember is that you have had blood tests etc. It isn't a significant symptom, as other things would present first - the weight is usually significant too, not a few pounds. Also it is continuous, or it was in my experience. I'm talking stones, not pounds.

Go to SW, get yourself healthy. Lots of support and distraction too xx

[pulisa]

That's excellent advice, Mercime. With your insight you have the power to control your HA ruminations, Kathryn, and I'm sure you will!