Going on a 'date'

[Pete_uk]

There are a few local ladies on a well known dating site whom I feel I have a lot in common with. :hugs: However, I'm nervous around new people and they expect to go out on a date and do something like go to a event of some kind. The problem is I've never dune such a thing and my mind goes blank just thinking about meeting up :shrug:

Socially I'm quite backwards but I'm also desperately lonely and want a woman in my life and its ripping me apart inside :weep:

I don't know how to approach the matter or anything :shrug:

[Phuzella]

To start with don't worry about making a first date an event or anything too special. First meet ups from dating sites are usually a drink in a pub or cafe or similar public place. If you've been chatting to these women for a while, you maybe have an idea of what they're like but be cautious.
Right that's the warnings out the way lol. Going on a first date is always nerve wracking so your date would probably be as nervous as you. You'll never know till you try. Hopefully even if romance is not instantly forthcoming you'll get some experience of going out and meeting people :)

[Neutralview]

There are a few local ladies on a well known dating site whom I feel I have a lot in common with. :hugs: However, I'm nervous around new people and they expect to go out on a date and do something like go to a event of some kind. The problem is I've never dune such a thing and my mind goes blank just thinking about meeting up :shrug:

Socially I'm quite backwards but I'm also desperately lonely and want a woman in my life and its ripping me apart inside :weep:

I don't know how to approach the matter or anything :shrug:

I'm the same. The only thing that loosens me up ( before going on a date for example) is either drinking or taking a tranquilser (xanax or diazepam). I'm nervous & uptight on a daily basis let alone when I go on a date. If only doctors/gps would understand & accept to prescribe tranquilsers cause they are specifically used for Anxiety/Social Anxiety

[swipka777]

Don't be nervous, everything would be ok

[Shezney]

Perhaps you could explain your anxiety to them before meeting up? If it goes well they would find out anyway, better to get it out in the open rather than them thinking you're not interested when you make excuses for not doing certain stuff

[alechamilton]

You have nothing to lose from going on the date, just go for it, as soon as you meet up and get chatting you'll forget you were even anxious!

[randomforeigner]

Write down a few topics you could use to talk about on a notepad and stick it in your pocket.

Might mention I'm a big fan of Debrah Fine and her audiobook "Fine art of smalltalk", there is some stuff on YouTube.

[Betsy9]

Well, first time probably not gonna be easy but you just have to deal whit it and do it. :)

[G.Samsa]

Well done Pete on getting to this stage! And I love your charismatic use of emoji!

I'm certainly not one to give advice about this sort of thing, but yes don't feel bad at all about keeping it simple.