Sincerelyali
29-09-16, 00:23
Lately, my anxiety has been through the freaking roof.. It is probably because there is SO MUCH change in my life right now. New location, new home, new job, new relationship, new people, getting rid of my kitties.. All in literally the past month and on top of that, i have a pile of medical bills on my night stand and 69 cents in my bank account tell tomorrow night.. Before I explain my entire life.. I need to go back to the main question here.
What I feel-
I feel drained. I am 21 years old, and i am exhausted. I get 8+ hours of sleep a night and I just have no energy. Coffee doesn't even help. I feel so lazy, I really have to force myself to make dinner. Sometimes i wish i could just have a feeding tube. I usually get anxious eating anyways in fear that i will choke. My whole body just feels so weak lately and my eyes so heavy.. Almost like my body just wants to shut down. And you know what my mind thinks of that? My mind doesn't care.. My mom is saying "do it, we need a break". But then.. listen to this.. I NEVER feel relaxed. I can not relax. Whether its in a bath tub with lavender and candles, my own bed watching my favorite tv show. NOTHING. I feel hopeless. :( I just want to cry and cry and cry because it somewhat (just a little) gives me some relief. And i want to not get up for work, or for shopping, going out or anything i just want to lay in bed.. all day long. Staring at the wall.
What I feel-
I feel drained. I am 21 years old, and i am exhausted. I get 8+ hours of sleep a night and I just have no energy. Coffee doesn't even help. I feel so lazy, I really have to force myself to make dinner. Sometimes i wish i could just have a feeding tube. I usually get anxious eating anyways in fear that i will choke. My whole body just feels so weak lately and my eyes so heavy.. Almost like my body just wants to shut down. And you know what my mind thinks of that? My mind doesn't care.. My mom is saying "do it, we need a break". But then.. listen to this.. I NEVER feel relaxed. I can not relax. Whether its in a bath tub with lavender and candles, my own bed watching my favorite tv show. NOTHING. I feel hopeless. :( I just want to cry and cry and cry because it somewhat (just a little) gives me some relief. And i want to not get up for work, or for shopping, going out or anything i just want to lay in bed.. all day long. Staring at the wall.