breakdown.. please don't be mad at me.

[Stephenie.welch]

I was laying down on my side and felt a pea sized very mobile what I think is a lymph node on my left collarbone when I get up and stand it's gone I can't find it. I don't understand why is this happening to me?? I hate this life. There's no way my Dr will send me to a ultrasound because she probably won't be able to find it and I'm just breaking down it moves around with barely any pressure and it isn't big should I worry? I'm going to make an appointment but ,you husband says it's ridiculous and so does the rest of my family

---------- Post added 01-10-16 at 01:44 ---------- Previous post was 30-09-16 at 23:38 ----------

All these reads and no reply? :(

[dale12345]

I completely understand I am the same way, health anxiety is a horrible thing to live with.Are you seeing a therapist. I hope you feel better.

[Stephenie.welch]

Yes I'm see a psychiatrist he even prescribed me Cymbalta I'm just so scared my son's pediatrician who Is also a family friend told me it's not concerning as its very movable and pea sized but I can't stop worrying

[ServerError]

Stick with your medication and tell your therapist everything. This is the best way to deal with health anxiety that we have yet come up with.

As for your lump, if a doctor isn't worried, neither should be. You've found an imperfection and your anxious mind has latched on to it and catastrophised the situation. It is this pattern of cognitive behaviour that we all must challenge, see through, and ultimately defeat, if we want calmness.

[Stephenie.welch]

I'm going to keep going to therapy. I just want this shit to end. It's ruining my life. I got a chest x-ray and it was clear tonight. The bump feels smaller than a pea now . still there and very very mobile just rolls around.

[Joe Hayes]

As I have understood it moveable is a very good sign that you are not dealing with something sinister in these things.

[Captain irrational]

I'm going to keep going to therapy. I just want this shit to end. It's ruining my life. I got a chest x-ray and it was clear tonight. The bump feels smaller than a pea now . still there and very very mobile just rolls around.

If it's getting smaller then it's almost certainly of no concern. Try and leave it alone for while, poking lymph nodes only irritates and inflames them.

[Stephenie.welch]

I went to see an ENT and he said he really doesn't think this is lymphoma should I trust him and move on?? I can't stop crying ,y doc ordered a ultrasound but please pray for me.

[ServerError]

If you can't trust a doctor, who will you trust? There's nobody better qualified to comment than a trained physician.

To answer your question - YES! Move on! You've got your answer. You don't have lymphoma.

However, you need to continue to work on your anxiety. This is the illness you do have, and it's clearly hurting you.

[Mercime]

Ok, this is going to sound harsh but I'll chance it. "Pray for me" is melodramatic and ridiculous - why on earth would you need prayers when two doctors and a chest X-ray have told you there's nothing wrong?
Tumours don't reduce in size. They don't disappear when you stand up. They don't roll around, move position, hide from you - they are solid and they grow.

You need to concentrate on your therapy Stephanie. What has your therapist suggested you do to deal with your fears?