Is it best to confront your anxiety?

[Scrugger]

Hi, I have GAD and am on a lot of medication.

My anxiety is closely related to work. Example thoughts are, am I good enough, they will laugh at my presentation, I'm going to have a panic attack at the client site/hotel etc.

I work as an IT Consultant so there is pressure.

I really want to confront and move through my anxiety rather than let it control me.

Has anyone done this successfully and do you have any tips?

[Lady Penelope]

Hello
I have not done this yet but I have just started one to one CBT with a therapist and that is the advice she has given me. I have read some good books which seem to make sense but I know it's easier said than done! Have you read the Dare book?

[brucealmighty]

from personal experience it is definitely a good idea to confront your fears, but I would add to do it gradually, there was a technique used called flooding where your fear of lifts would be dealt with by getting in a lift with your therapist who may then press the emergency stop so your fear would be maximised. this would cause you to realise that it was all fine really. Or if it was me I`d very possibly beat the therapist to death and wait for the authorities.

I would try to accept that there will always be some level of fear, nerves, excitement etc when you are in front of people. peter kay for example gets dreadful panic before a show and many musicians would look down, or even keep their eyes closed because the thought of a huge crowd was too much so they had their own coping mechanisms.

I have been in meetings before I ever had anxiety and when told about job losses I felt hot, slightly sick, noticed my heartbeat etc - all the symptoms of borderline panic. fast forward 20 years and I`d link those feelings to panic, and maybe set myself off even now. So the awareness is always there.

I would certainly try to do things that make you slightly nervous, in my case to begin with this was going outside, it progressed to going to a shop etc so with you it might be a presentation even when you feel a bit off - the audience won`t know so if you sip water, cough, or have to excuse yourself you can blame a bug or whatever - the key thing is to have a few little tricks ready.

I really wish you well, I would be in a heap on the floor trying to do your job so realise that it isn`t easy, but you`re totally capable of doing what you need to. It might not come easy but nothing worthwhile ever does

[unspoken]

CBT might help with that, see if your GP can refer you, or in my area you can refer yourself for an assessment. My CBT therapist got me to think about the possible good outcomes and also to keep a record of the worst case scenario that I was worrying about and then later to record whether that actually happened or not, to show that most of the time the really awful consequences don't happen. I have similar fears at work and it's really hard to deal with. It might be easier to challenge your anxiety with the help of a therapist, I don't know if you've tried that before. Medication can only do so much.

[MusicDevote]

Has anyone done this successfully and do you have any tips?

Yes to a point.

When I worked as IT Consultant I usually did more preparation with myself than the task/project at hand. I knew all the technical stuff, however dealing new people was the difficult bit; especially when you get that one client who is more trouble than it is worth (emotionally).

It took patience, determination and pushing myself out of the comfort zone to get through the day. Things I used to do before meeting new clients was:

- Checking out the Company and their values
- Looking at stakeholders LinkedIn Profiles
- Reading reviews Glassdoor or forums

Now I am no longer working as an consultant, but still working within IT. My role is internal only and pays well (less than a consultant). The major personal benefit is having more time to focus on me to keep my anxiety in check.

Hope you find methods in managing your anxiety within high pressured world of IT..

[Scrugger]

Thanks all.

I'm in a new job and 1 month in. I'm supposed to have my first client engagement on Tuesday where I will be away from home 2 nights a week. I felt ok initially about this but my anxiety shot right up last Thursday. This weekend I've been doing everything I know I should to help. I've written my thoughts down and challenged them/worse case etc., kept busy, gone to the gym and seen my therapist. Last night I broke down in tears, felt really low and exhausted. My GP has signed me off for 4 weeks but I felt if I could just push through it I would be fine. Now I'm not so sure...

What does everyone think? I'm so confused and anxious