Had enough

[Lost all hope]

Just want to crawl under a rock and die will solve all my problems had enough of this crap
If I can't help myself no one else can help me.

[Buster70]

Hi , I've had days somtimes months like it you just have to hang in there somtimes things just click and get better , I've tried and tried to get better somtimes it happens when you do sod all , just keep getting up in the morning and doing what you can , wish I had the answer for you , take care .

[ana]

Even though what you are saying is true (i.e. that you're in control of your feelings and thoughts), it is not as simple as that. Please don't be so hard on yourself. You didn't bring this on yourself, nor did you wish your life to be difficult. It's very easy to blame yourself for the state that you're in (I'm guilty of the same thing, too), but placing blame on yourself isn't productive; taking action is. Therapy, medication, support from friends and family, just getting on with life. That's what will result in success. :)

You will feel better. I promise x

[Lost all hope]

Hi buster thanks for replying it's really hard to see beyond this sometimes it just takes over!
I'm hoping an praying that one day when or if I get better il look back an think what was all the fuss about!

---------- Post added at 21:06 ---------- Previous post was at 21:03 ----------

Hi ana I know what your saying about blaming myself it seems the easier option!
I don't have support off family they tell me to just get on with it.
I'm starting therapy on Tuesday an I'm on venlafaxine an propranolol but don't think there working x

[lotusblossom]

I know just how you feel and think the same I know its wrong but when you are in the grip of anxiety with all its symptoms constantly and there seems to be no let up its consumed you and all you can see is no end to it my blip as they are called has gone on for 5 weeks now and no end in sight in some ways its getting worse because I know take to my bed I feel so ill and theresno way I can go for a good walk or exercise because I have other health conditions that limit my activities as some people on here recommend but if it works for them then that's good I seem to be all out of positive thinking. I have read the book At Last A Life and its brilliant and that book was my therapist for long enough and it worked and I managed to live a reasonably good and happy life and when I could feel my avxiety raising its ugly head I would get my book and read a chapter and I could feel myself calming down I recommend the book because he certainly knows his stuff but right now I am just lost in the maze of symptoms feelings and sensations and its not a good place to be I hope I will recover enough and be back to where I was before this latest blip

[Lost all hope]

It really is awful I'm like u i seem to symptoms everyday all day without any hope insight, I know I should be fighting this but I have no fight I'm exhausted, an now with my foot like it is I think iv got some sort of disease that's killing me slowly because it just came on I can't sleep it's too painful

[Beej22]

I have had times like this too, but I then look at how I am now to what I was like months/years ago. Try keeping a diary to monitor yourself, seeing improvements help concentrate on the positives. In your diary only write your accomplishments or goals met, I look back in my diary and can now see days where I wrote 'went to tescos local today :):):)', makes me happy that now my goals are far greater.

[PunkyFish]

Just want to crawl under a rock and die will solve all my problems had enough of this crap
If I can't help myself no one else can help me.

Hi

Sorry to hear you're having a tough time at the moment. I have days like this when all I want to do is just stay in bed and be miserable. It's horrible when you're faced with problems that make you feel like this. Have you been to your doctor for any advice? A few months ago I was in a bad place, lost a lot of my motivation and could not be bothered to fight anymore so I just stayed in bed! however a few months on I'm doing much better and I'm much more positive and now when I look back at the past few months I laugh to myself and think why did I get into such a state and become so down because of my problems and issues.

[ana]

It's a shame your family are not supportive, but it's difficult for non-sufferers to understand what this disorder feels like. I get good and bad days, everyone does. I was feeling so anxious at work today. I was panicking, thought I couldn't cope and would have to leave after 2 hours. I wanted to jump out of my own skin, and the depersonalisation was so bad. But you know what? I had felt this way before, may times, and nothing bad happened then, nor did it happen this morning. As badly as it feels, anxiety is just a feeling. Feelings pass, things get better.... then they get worse, too, but they also get better again! :winks:

[Lost all hope]

Hi I'm at docs tomorrow my Meds got put up a dose but that was 3 weeks ago so don't know if it's anything to do with that?
Your right it is hard for people to understand when they don't have it but they don't even try to understand it my partner doesn't help at all I wish he was a bit more supportive!
Iv had this like 3 years now an iv been this way before an know I get a bit better after it, so why can't I realise what it is an just accept it? It's so frustrating

[lotusblossom]

I have come to the realisation that you cannot fight it because you wont win, and its not the way to deal with it I have been told that you have to accept it and live with it until it bothers you no more easier said than done and I don't think I am strong enough to do that and the disappointment that I feel now going through this horrible time when I was doing so well just crushed me so now my symptoms are coming thick and fast how many times must we get better only for it to come back twice as bad and stay twice as long spoke to my doctor this morning and shes upped my duloxetine to 60mg until I get to see the psychiatrist to discuss a possible change of meds but I certainly know how you feel,I don't want to get better for it to come back and wreck my fragile recovery it willalways be in the back of my mind sitting on my shoulder just waiting to pounce

[Lost all hope]

I no what u mean I don't think I'm strong enough to fight it either, an like u said it's always going to be there an waiting for us to make a wrong move as to whether where going to think about it as in one day we could be feeling ok then ask our self's why were feeling ok then bam anxiety is back on top form!
Sorry if that doesn't make sense!
Hope u start to feel a lot better soon

[ana]

There's no point in fighting it, I agree. You'd just be fighting yourself, and how could such a fight ever result in victory? Perhaps you could have your partner read up on anxiety, you could inform him on it better. Sometimes people don't react well to our condition out of fear as they don't understand the condition well enough. I think it's quite normal to feel changes in your mood after starting a new medication, or changing medication.

[Lost all hope]

Your right ana it's to exhausting to fight, I just find it really strange that we know it's anxiety so why can't we get that into our heads or is that just me lol?
Iv gave him stuff to read an tried telling him how I feel but might aswel talk to the wall maybe one day he will want to understand.

[ana]

I find the exact same thing! I keep thinking 'if it's all under my control, why can't I make it go away?! :mad: What frustrates me is the fact that I can't seem to be able to learn, not even after 15 + years, that the anxiety can't and won't harm me and that I shouldn't fear it.
I really hope your partner shows a bit more understanding and interest in your anxiety disorder...

[Lissa101]

Someone who is more science-y could probably explain this a lot better than me but its basically because your body thinks its in a permanent state of danger and logical reasoning doesn't have much impact on that, in the short term anyway.

I find it helps to try and appreciate that my body and brain are trying to keep me safe from danger, that they are working for me even though the dangers they perceive as threatening are, in fact, not. I think this is what people mean when they say to 'make friends' with your anxiety. It helped when I had panic attacks before sleeping, every time I would nearly drift off - bang, a huge wave of adrenaline and dizziness would hit. Then I would remember that my body is doing this because it perceives danger and, of course, sleeping is not a good thing when your brain thinks there is danger everywhere.

Re-conditioning your physiology and mind to be less reactive can be a long, slow, difficult process. I had a breakdown nearly five years ago and it took around 18 months to feel really normal again. I'm going through a relapse at the moment and feel the same as you do in many ways. However, I got through it the first time and between then and now I've done and achieved many things and have been very happy.

So don't lose hope, you're in a black hole now and can't see a way out but there is one and it is worth getting through all the horrid days to be there :) x