Im falling to pieces cant take much more

[ella32]

I can't take much more of this constant fear and worry. I can't stop thinking there is something sinister wrong with me and the doctors keep missing it. I'm so convinced I'm going to have a heart attack every time I get chest pains which is every day regardless of doctors telling me I have no underlying heart problems , it doesn't matter how many ecgs I've had how many blood tests I've had or chest X-ray's it doesn't register that I'm OK . The last time I was checked in hospital was Saturday but here I am today dealing with chest pains and thinking I'm going to have a heart attack and die . It doesn't matter what I do I can't stop the fear or the thoughts. Every day is a continuous struggle to get through the day. I can't get it to stop and it's driving me crazy .I've never felt so low as I do right now . I can't take the physical pain or the constant thoughts anymore . I'm scared 24/7 I have no life anymore.I'm so bloody lost.

[ServerError]

Ella, I don't mean to sound unpleasant, but what do you want from us here? You post the same thing over and over, and receive the same advice. If you just want understanding, you'll get plenty because we're all current or former anxiety sufferers. But what more can we do at this point? How long have you had these worries? Have you come to any harm? Why would the doctors have missed anything?

We all need help with our anxiety, but some of that help has to come from within. If you want these fears to go away, it starts with you.

[Sar89]

Oh sweetheart I feel your pain as do most people on here. That is the vicious cycle of HA. There is nothing wrong with ur heart the doctors have checked you. You have given yourself psychosomatic symptoms. I have done this before phantom pains and symptoms which just reinforce ur belief that something has been missed that I are that 1/5000. The good news is that deep down you know it's ur HA that's why ur writing on here... Have u seen a doc about your mental state ? Xx

[Beachlady]

Ella, the way out resides with you.

YOU have to give yourself a good shake, and stop the destructive self-talk. You need to look in the mirror and tell yourself the truth: that you are a lovely, healthy person who has an anxiety issue. That the chest pains are anxiety. Period. That you will be FINE.

Sometimes that’s all that's needed. Mind over matter and all that. Demand this of yourself. You deserve it.

[ella32]

I don't know how. I'm doing everything I can possibly do I'm going to therapy I'm on medication but it just doesn't stop . I try to distract myself but that doesn't work either because it's a constant thing. I'm physically,emotionally and mentally drained over this. I don't know what else to do

[Beachlady]

Ella, what if you DID have have a heart problem? Would you buy yourself a coffin and jump in?

The point I’m making is that even IF you had a heart probem (which you don’t), it wouldn’t be the end of the world ANYWAY. Millions of people have heart issues and lead active, happy lives.

I think part of your problem is in assuming that any health issue is catastrophic. It isn’t.

Again, it begins with you, and changing your thinking.

[ServerError]

These things don't go away all at once. So whatever you do, you're stuck with it for the time being. So the best thing you can do is just allow it to be there. You need to lose your fear of these feelings. Observe what they actually do. Notice that nothing you feel ever causes you any harm. Just let it all be there. This is so much better than the constant fighting, which only adds more stress.

I know it sounds impossible, but pretty much everybody who's gotten to a better place - no matter what particular methods they used - will have been forced to tolerate, put up with and accept unpleasant feelings. It's not that you have to like them. You just have to see them for what they really are not fear them. You can do this.

[ella32]

I try to tolerate the pains but then I get caught with the what if thoughts and I can never seem to tolerate them or let them pass they actually consume me and I break all the time. It's not normal to go to the doctor as much as I do , the need for reassurance is so strong I feel that I have to tell someone what physical symptoms I'm feeling so that if I collapse then they can tell the hospital. I have never been as bad as I am now the thoughts are so overwhelming I can't think rationally at all because it's always worst case scenario always.

[jessicaf1323]

I completely know how you feel. I feel like I am prisoner trapped in my own mind. :hugs:

[paranoid-viking]

I can't take much more of this constant fear and worry. I can't stop thinking there is something sinister wrong with me and the doctors keep missing it. I'm so convinced I'm going to have a heart attack every time I get chest pains which is every day regardless of doctors telling me I have no underlying heart problems , it doesn't matter how many ecgs I've had how many blood tests I've had or chest X-ray's it doesn't register that I'm OK . The last time I was checked in hospital was Saturday but here I am today dealing with chest pains and thinking I'm going to have a heart attack and die . It doesn't matter what I do I can't stop the fear or the thoughts. Every day is a continuous struggle to get through the day. I can't get it to stop and it's driving me crazy .I've never felt so low as I do right now . I can't take the physical pain or the constant thoughts anymore . I'm scared 24/7 I have no life anymore.I'm so bloody lost.

I know exactly how you feel. My worries has disabled me. I had quite a good life until June. Not perfect but good. But after that it has ascendened into darknes.
Now my fear is somehow different from yours but; if what you fear is hearth attack and hearth disease you should not worry; such tests are very accurate. I had a fear of that as well some years ago but it calmed downed after some tests.
Remember too that most people survices a heart attack these days; not that I think that you are at any risk of getting one.

[Ceri78]

Just want to give you a "big hug" and to tell you your not alone xxx

---------- Post added at 09:50 ---------- Previous post was at 09:49 ----------

Just want to give u a "big hug" your not alone lovely xxx

[escapeartist]

These things don't go away all at once. So whatever you do, you're stuck with it for the time being. So the best thing you can do is just allow it to be there. You need to lose your fear of these feelings. Observe what they actually do. Notice that nothing you feel ever causes you any harm. Just let it all be there. This is so much better than the constant fighting, which only adds more stress.

I know it sounds impossible, but pretty much everybody who's gotten to a better place - no matter what particular methods they used - will have been forced to tolerate, put up with and accept unpleasant feelings. It's not that you have to like them. You just have to see them for what they really are not fear them. You can do this.

This has been one of the most helpful things I have read in a while! Thank you.

Ella, I hope you find peace in the company of others who are going through this - we are all suffering in similar ways. things that help me:

--I have a list of conditions that I have worried about that never materialised.

--I look at the chances of me having X at the age and health condition that I am in. It'susually less than 10% and usually a lot less!

--I get out for a walk - this has been helping my numbness, tingling and other neurological symptoms lately.

--I have started counselling. Is this an option for you?

As others have said, try and help yourself see your thought patterns as what they are: thought patterns that you get trapped into. Why would the doctors be missing something that is so easy to diagnose? Trust in your doctors!

All the best

[ella32]

This has been one of the most helpful things I have read in a while! Thank you.

Ella, I hope you find peace in the company of others who are going through this - we are all suffering in similar ways. things that help me:

--I have a list of conditions that I have worried about that never materialised.

--I look at the chances of me having X at the age and health condition that I am in. It'susually less than 10% and usually a lot less!

--I get out for a walk - this has been helping my numbness, tingling and other neurological symptoms lately.

--I have started counselling. Is this an option for you?

As others have said, try and help yourself see your thought patterns as what they are: thought patterns that you get trapped into. Why would the doctors be missing something that is so easy to diagnose? Trust in your doctors!

All the best

I try to trust my doctor I really do but because of what if thinking it is hard. At the moment I can visit my doctor up to twice a week because of pain and thinking it something sinister only to be told it anxiety making me feel the way I do. I can't even tell you how many times I have been to hospital over pains in chest where they have done bloods,ecgs and chest X-ray's and every time it's OK but yet the thoughts that something wrong are so overwhelming and strong they keep me in this hole I find myself in and nothing I do helps.

[Mercime]

Ella, do you mind if I ask you a couple questions? Do you live alone, or with family? I'm guessing you don't work (not sure of your age), and you've mentioned panic disorder in the past - how does this affect you?

Reasons for asking x

[ella32]

Ella, do you mind if I ask you a couple questions? Do you live alone, or with family? I'm guessing you don't work (not sure of your age), and you've mentioned panic disorder in the past - how does this affect you?

Reasons for asking x

I live with my family . I'm nearly 40 . Every part of this disorder affects my life. I'm afraid to do anything or go anywhere on my own. X

[Mercime]

Do you have children to look after? Wondering if you suffer panic attacks as well? Your family must know about your fears I guess

[ella32]

Do you have children to look after? Wondering if you suffer panic attacks as well? Your family must know about your fears I guess

I have 3 kids my youngest is eleven. I do get panic attacks had a bad one today. My eldest daughter is the only one who's know how bad this has gotten for me because I hide it from my other two.x

[Gary A]

I have 3 kids my youngest is eleven. I do get panic attacks had a bad one today. My eldest daughter is the only one who's know how bad this has gotten for me because I hide it from my other two.x

I think the fact you run off to your doctor or to A&E at the merest hint of any type of twinge in your chest is just keeping your mind fixed on the possibility of something fatal.

Why don't you resist temptation next time? If you can go at least a few months without some medical visit then perhaps your confidence will increase.

[ServerError]

I think you're one of the posters we see sometimes who comes on here in a state of panic, pours her heart about the state of suffering she's in, gets advice, then goes away for a few days before returning to repeat the process. It's clear that anxiety is not just a facet of your life, but the entire focus on your life.

The above is not a criticism. It's just an observation. Like so many of us, you're firmly trapped in a particular cycle. But it's a cycle you can and have to break. As I've said before, anxiety doesn't go away at the drop of a hat. But you can begin your recovery right this second by taking that first step.

Otherwise I have to ask again, what are you looking for from us on here? We can and do relate, but do you want to live the rest of you life in this state, relying on supportive messages from people online? It starts with you, Ella.

[ella32]

I think the fact you run off to your doctor or to A&E at the merest hint of any type of twinge in your chest is just keeping your mind fixed on the possibility of something fatal.

Why don't you resist temptation next time? If you can go at least a few months without some medical visit then perhaps your confidence will increase.

I hope so because every day is a struggle to get through it. X

---------- Post added at 18:48 ---------- Previous post was at 18:46 ----------


I think you're one of the posters we see sometimes who comes on here in a state of panic, pours her heart about the state of suffering she's in, gets advice, then goes away for a few days before returning to repeat the process. It's clear that anxiety is not just a facet of your life, but the entire focus on your life.

The above is not a criticism. It's just an observation. Like so many of us, you're firmly trapped in a particular cycle. But it's a cycle you can and have to break. As I've said before, anxiety doesn't go away at the drop of a hat. But you can begin your recovery right this second by taking that first step.

Otherwise I have to ask again, what are you looking for from us on here? We can and do relate, but do you want to live the rest of you life in this state, relying on supportive messages from people online? It starts with you, Ella.

I don't know what I'm looking for anymore. The pains and fear and constant worry just get too much and I have to get what's in my head out. I feel so isolated and trapped in my own mind.

[ServerError]

I'm not saying that you shouldn't share. We all need to talk these things through. I'm just saying that you need to have a very honest conversation with yourself. Your current approach to the situation isn't working.

I do believe you can get better, Ella. Everybody has it within them. But there's going to come a time when you have to say 'enough is enough' and to stop letting these unpleasant feelings rule your life. They do begin to fade when you stop letting them control you.