Obsessed with looking at my eyes and hand

[paranoid-viking]

Because; in the fear that I have I have read(sorry) that one gets jaundice. And I am looking inside my eyes and on my hand palms too see if I am developing yellow color. Tonight when panicking and woke up I turned on the light looked at my palms and felt OMG I am turnining yellow. But with a further look probably not. Same with the eye; I am looking closely in the mirror suspecting but mostly see redness due to stress and lack of sleep.
Anyone else gets such hysterics obsessions when thinking about a disease thinking "OMG here comes the symptoms"?

[Gary A]

Why would you get symptoms of an illness that you clearly don't have?

You mentioned that your pancreas had been scanned recently and declared fine, so where's the issue?

The problem here is that you insist on continually scaring yourself by utterly refusing to stop googling stories and information about this illness.

Just....why?

This forum seems to be a place that some people come almost demanding help, yet they just cannot and will not even begin to help themselves.

[paranoid-viking]

Why would you get symptoms of an illness that you clearly don't have?

You mentioned that your pancreas had been scanned recently and declared fine, so where's the issue?

The problem here is that you insist on continually scaring yourself by utterly refusing to stop googling stories and information about this illness.

Just....why?

This forum seems to be a place that some people come almost demanding help, yet they just cannot and will not even begin to help themselves.

Well, I have answered that elsewhere; but I can do it again: I have read som much many places that abdomonal ultrasound is not enough. And that is what scares me. Plus I have abdominal discomfort that gets worse every day.
I do not have a simple answer to why I do it. I am obsessed and have no life anymore. This scare has disabled me. I just exist; I dont live; I cry every day for those I fear I will leave behind. I have a hard time looking my parents in the eyes when I met them.

[MyNameIsTerry]

To you question, and as a non HA sufferer who had been reading this board for years, yes - a lot of people on here do that. There are plenty of threads about "do you think of symptoms and then they start?"

You can't cause a disease through your own thoughts, thinking you can is Magical Thinking. Thought Action Fusion is another term more closely related to the belief that you.

You need to work on recovery and initially a therapist is very likely to want you to stop exposing yourself to these stories because you can't handle them yet and they will want to use structured exposure to work up to this so you can no longer be triggered by them.

You need to learn to stop acting on the urge to check, it's a reinforcing compulsive behaviour. This may be very hard at first and not everyone can just stop, so come up with an extinction plan like in ERP to work on reduction.

Cognitive Distortions are well worth reading about too, it's easy to see them in your posts like everyone else posting on here, once you've put in the time to truly spot them like I have (it's always easier practicing on others first, that helped me spot mine more intuitively).

---------- Post added at 12:20 ---------- Previous post was at 12:17 ----------


Well, I have answered that elsewhere; but I can do it again: I have read som much many places that abdomonal ultrasound is not enough. And that is what scares me. Plus I have abdominal discomfort that gets worse every day.
I do not have a simple answer to why I do it. I am obsessed and have no life anymore. This scare has disabled me. I just exist; I dont live; I cry every day for those I fear I will leave behind. I have a hard time looking my parents in the eyes when I met them.

Yes, I'm glad you can see this about yourself because not all can do. You are telling people how to rationalise this same behavior on plenty of threads, I've seen you discussing it as well as simply saying why the thinking is flawed to individuals. But doing it with yourself is the ultimate test because the power of anxiety is involved, unlike when a stranger on a forum asks.

[SLA]

You become what you focus on. That is all I will say.

A very good start would be start focussing on other things. If you say you can't, then you won't ever change.

I would seek the advice of a counsellor or therapist.

Posting here continually won't solve any of your problems if you don't stop to listen to the advice.

Good luck.

[axolotl]

Please stop reading about illness, we're not qualified to understand what we're reading, and we're certainly not qualified to diagnose ourselves. That's why it takes seven years of gruelling education and on-the-job training to make a doctor, and they get paid so well. Thinking we know better than doctors is hugely presumptuous and a little arrogant when we really think about it.

[Fishmanpa]

PViking,

Over the course of the last several months, you've had many fears that all have turned out to be unfounded and attributable to your anxiety. Scientific medical testing and medical professionals have confirmed this. You're very presence on this site affirms this.

Now, for whatever reason, you've latched onto another irrational fear and have become focused on that. At one point or another, you're going to have to take some action and stop the cycle. I know you stated that getting help takes time in your country but your GP can prescribe some meds in the meantime. You have to do "something" to try and help yourself because posting here is just feeding your real illness.

Positive thoughts

[Kathryn313]

This scare has disabled me. I just exist; I dont live; I cry every day for those I fear I will leave behind. I have a hard time looking my parents in the eyes when I met them.

The good thing is you are still meeting them. Everyday you spend crying is a day wasted. Even more so if you do have what you fear. Could you tell me one thing that went well today?